Disclaimer, I hate admitting this but no, I don't own Voyager or any of its crew.

Angst, not my usual style but I was in a dark mood.
 
 

Part 1: Nadir
 

He had never wanted to make it home.

It was the best three years of his life, an apparition of the perfect life.

A taste of knowing what it's like to have friends.

And now it was over. His chimera was being shattered, replaced by the cruel reality that was his life.

Voyager had returned home.

The Marquis had been pardoned, himself allowed to hold onto his commission.

He didn't care about that, he knew the only reason he was still a lieutenant was his father and he didn't want to obtain respect by standing in someone else's shadow.

Janeway was gone, off with Voyager and a mostly new crew though he knew Harry and Tuvok were still aboard. They'd gone off on a mission, off to save some world no doubt.

He had had the option of remaining on Voyager as well but it would have been too painful. He'd only be deluding himself if he remained aboard he knew he would just pretend that nothing had changed.

Everything had changed.

All his friends were scattered, leaving him behind. He was stuck in some monotonous desk job in San Francisco while they made lives for themselves.

He was alone. Again he was alone. He ignored all the communiqués form his family he refused contact with his friends. He knew it was his fault he was alone but that didn't help him feel any better.

What if he were to end it?

Unravel this reality just as quickly as his delusion aboard Voyager had been ripped from him.

It would be so easy.

And that's what Tom Paris always did, right?

Take the easy way out.

If you give me good enough reviews I may consider writing more to this story.

If you give me bad reviews I may do it anyway, what do you think of that?
 

TBC