Title:   No Regrets 1/?
Author:  T'Pam
Codes:   C/P, P/T, P/K (sort of), All
Rating:  NC-17 overall (rather tame)

Summary: A/U.  (Humor mixed with occassional angst.)
A rehash of the old stuck in a lift and its consequences.

This story is set early season six, before the episode
'Fair Haven' and Chakotay's rather personal admission to
using the holodecks for sex.  In this story he is staid
and true, pure and chaste.  Well, perhaps not, but he
certainly hasn't gotten it on with any of the

Warning: M/M sex and some coarse language.
As I said above, it's rather tame, but I wouldn't like
someone under 17 to read it, hence the rating.

Archiving:  To all those I've already given permission to -
yes.  Others - please ask.  Don't worry, I'll probably say
yes.  I just like to know where my stories are going to.

Disclaimer:  Tom Paris, Voyager and all its crew belong to
Paramount/Viacom.  No profit will be made from this story.

Special thanks to Monica for her thoughtful comments and
for just being there as my 'guinea pig' and 'sounding board'.

Dedicated to Jeanette for her never ending encouragement,
support and enthusiasm.

And now, on with the show.

No Regrets - Part One
by T'Pam


"Get in, Paris."

I hesitate.  "Shouldn't one of us stay up here, just in

His voice is soft, but deadly.  "Get in, before I throw you

I gulp as I look at the small narrow lift and then back
at him.  I know I pushed him too far... and when am I
going to learn to keep my big mouth shut, anyway... but
torture?  I mean revenge is one thing, and I'm willing to
take what he dishes out, but he shouldn't be allowed to
torture people.

And this will definitely be classed as torture.  The lift
itself doesn't look too safe, but it's the thought of the
narrow crevice that it'll be traversing down that really
has me worried.  I shudder as I imagine what it'll be
like.  Dark and eerie with rock surrounding me on all

Everyone knows I'm claustrophobic.  It was the standing
joke on Voyager for weeks after we traveled through that
area of space in those stasis chambers, and I wouldn't
stay in mine.

Not everyone teased me, of course.  There was a lot of
genuine concern and offers of help, but, the point is,
everyone knows about it.  And that means that the
Commander does too, and he's still ordering me to get
into the lift.  Asshole!

I make my way over there as he contacts Voyager to let
them know we'll be out of communications range for a

The mineral deposits that Carey and Vorik are so excited
about - well, Carey is, anyway - are a long way beneath
the surface.  They're already down there with our
Alsorian guide, waiting for us.  Voyager's transporters
are unable to function through all this rock, so the only
way down there is that lift.

And I really don't want to get in that lift.  I'm not
worried about being underground, or even being in a small
working area.  I can be in a crowded room or a small
area of space without it affecting me.  But put me in a
confined area - especially a small, suffocating, confined
area - and the claustrophobia kicks in.

I scowl at the Commander as he continues to speak with
Janeway.  Of course, if I hadn't ticked him off the way I
did last night and this morning he wouldn't be taking out
his revenge on me in this way.

But he deserved it.  I mean he'd stuck his nose in where it
wasn't wanted and for some reason he's always had the ability
to stir me up more than anyone I've ever known.

It doesn't take much for me to lose my cool where he's
concerned and last night was another perfect example.


I'd been working on a holoprogram for one of the Delaney
sisters when he'd decided to give me some advice on how to
treat B'Elanna.  Who the hell did he think he was, anyway?
I'd made a crack about his love life, which he hadn't exactly
appreciated, and stormed off.

But, hell!  When's the last time he even had a love life?  I
think he may have got down and done the nasty with that Borg
woman from that freed collective a few years ago, but since
then if he's got it on with anybody, I can't remember it.

I'd made my way to B'Elanna's and immediately gotten into a
huge fight with her.

"If you've got a problem with me working on the holodeck you
should tell me, not bitch about it to the Commander," I'd
accused as soon as I'd entered her quarters.

She'd glared at me and put her hands on her hips.  "Two
things, Tom.  One, I did not bitch to Chakotay.  I haven't
said anything to Chakotay except to tell him where you were.
Clearly, everyone on the ship has noticed the way you neglect
me when you're busy with one of your little projects."

I'd opened my mouth to accuse her of the same thing, but
she'd hurried on.  "Two, I have told you how I feel about you
and that stupid, damned holodeck.  Evidently you weren't
listening.  Big surprise there."

"But I explained to you about this.  It isn't even for me.
Megan asked me to help her."

"I know all that," she'd cut me off.  "But it's always
something.  And I'm sick of it."

"Don't I always ask you to join me?  I try to include you,
but you're just not interested."

"That's right, I'm not.  Finally, something's penetrated
through that thick skull of yours."

"Are you interested in anything besides your goddamned
engines?" I'd shouted.

She'd hit me then, and it wasn't part of the Klingon mating
ritual, I can assure you.

So, I'd woken up in a bad mood this morning and things had
just gotten worse.  The Commander was still smarting over my
comment about his lack of sexual encounters recently and
decided to find fault with everything I did.

He'd just finished criticizing the flight path I'd mapped out
for our away mission and I'd had about all I could take.
"You know, Commander, I've been thinking.  There's really no
need for me to go on this little away mission.  You're
obviously a much better pilot than I am.  This new flight
path, you've just drawn up, proves that.  I think I should
stay here."

I'd been able to practically see the steam coming out of his
ears.  "You know, Paris, I've been thinking too.  Only, I'm
wise enough not to tell you what I've been thinking while
we're on duty.  It's a pity you don't have the same
restraint.  Meet me in the shuttlebay in one hour.  Let
Carey and Vorik know our departure time."

He'd stalked off, apparently planning his revenge.  And,
now, this was it.


He's glaring at me, so with a deep breath I step into the
lift.  I can do this.  The trip only takes a minute at the
most.  My claustrophobia's not that bad.  One minute.  What's

For one minute I'll be encased in rock, surrounded on all
sides.  Just like in a tomb.  Tomb?  What the hell did I
think that for?    Not a tomb.  Not a tomb.  A... a coffin.
That's what it is.  A coffin of rock.  Oh, gods!  I mustn't
think about it.  It's just one minute.  One minute.  I'll
count the seconds off.  It's not a coffin or a tomb or...

My palms are sweaty and my hands are shaking.  We haven't
even started yet.  The Commander's squeezing in next to me.
There's not enough room in here for both of us.  Not enough
air.  How the hell did Carey, Vorik and the Alsorian guide
fit in here?

The Alsorians are tiny people and Vorik's rather slight, as
well.  Chakotay's big, though.  Too big for this lift.  He'll
use up all the air.  I'm panicking.  I mustn't panic.  Keep
calm.  Deep breaths.

Chakotay grunts.  "Bit of a tight fit.  I guess it'll be all
right for a minute or two."

Two?  Keep calm.  Deep breaths.  No panicking.  I can do this.
Count to sixty.  Easy.

He presses the button and we begin to move downwards,
blackness engulfing us.

I swallow painfully and hold my breath.  If only I hadn't
needled him.  If only I'd kept my big mouth shut.  If only.
Not a coffin.  Not a coffin.  Oh Gods!!!!!


*Chakotay's POV*

"Get in, Paris."  I can't believe just how perverse he can be
sometimes.  His whole argument, as to why I should go down to
meet Carey and the others and he should stay up here on
guard, is totally unreasonable.  This is a friendly, peaceful
planet.  There's nothing to guard against.

He's doing it deliberately, just to needle me.  I've had
about all I can take from him.

He tries once more.  "Shouldn't one of us stay up here, just
in case?"

"Get in, before I throw you in."  In fact, throwing him in
sounds like a damn good idea.

He glares at me as he makes his way over to the lift.  I
contact Voyager and let the Captain know what's happening.
We'll be out of communicator range the whole time we're down

I remember Tom's parting shot to me the night before and grit
my teeth in anger.  Smart-mouthed wise-ass.  The last thing I
need at the moment is to be on an away mission with the
insolent prick.

I'd been genuinely concerned about B'Elanna.  She'd seemed
upset when I saw her in the mess hall.  She was very quiet
and subdued, not like herself at all, and I'd asked her if
there was anything wrong.  She'd said nothing she wasn't
already used to.

I'd wondered where Tom was, thinking that maybe he could
cheer her up, and she'd told me he was in the holodeck.  I'd
realized immediately what was wrong and decided to go and
have a quiet talk to him.

I was worried about the both of them, actually.  Their
relationship is a puzzle to me.  They say that opposites
attract and I know that's true, I've seen it for myself, but
Tom and B'Elanna are not really opposites.  They are alike in
many ways, but share absolutely no interests in common,

They don't even appear to enjoy one another's company all
that much, spending more time apart on their off duty hours
than together.

I have no doubt that they care about one another.  Certain
events over the years have proven that, but as to whether
they share a deep and abiding love... well, somehow I doubt

B'Elanna is like a little sister to me and I hate seeing her
so troubled.  And Tom is like a... well... Tom is Tom.  It's
hard to define our exact relationship.

We're more than mere officers serving together... shipmates,
comrades-in-arms.  I'd like to say that we were friends, but
I don't know if that's true.  He was a burr in my side for
many years, and right now he is again.  And all because I'd
tried to offer some friendly advice.


I'd found Tom in the holodeck, just finishing working on a
rather picturesque seaside town.

"So this is what you've been up to," I'd said.

He'd smiled and nodded.  "What do you think?  Do the seagulls
look all right to you?  I've had a lot of trouble getting
them to look realistic enough."

"Well they certainly look realistic to me.  What is this

"It's a birthday surprise for Jenny Delaney.  Megan asked me
to give her a hand with it.  Apparently this place has some
sort of significance for the two of them."

"I see.  Well, I'm sure she'll be pleased.  You've done an
excellent job, as per usual."

He'd given a small laugh and bowed.  "Thank you, kind, Sir.
I do have one small problem, though.  I'm going to have to
wait for Megan to approach me about this unless you can tell
me which twin's which?  I don't want to accidentally blab to
Jenny that it's finished and ruin the surprise."

"You don't know which twin Megan is?"

"Afraid not.  I'm always getting them mixed up."

"But I thought that Megan Delaney was the woman of your
dreams a few years ago."

He'd frowned.  "Not really.  And, anyway, that was in my BB

"BB years?"

"Before B'Elanna."

"Speaking of B'Elanna, that's actually why I'm here.  I'm a
little worried about her."

"Oh?"  He'd looked instantly concerned.  "Is she all right?"

"Well, no, she seems a bit depressed.  Maybe you should try
to spend a little more time with her.  Make her feel like
she's important to you.  You know she's not completely over
her depression yet.  I think she needs to know that you're
here for her.  That she can lean on you."

Tom's face had instantly tightened.  "Is that so?  Well,
thanks for your concern.  I'm sure we'll work it out."

"I hope so, Tom.  She really needs all the support she can
get.  Perhaps you could forgo the holodeck for a little

"With all due respect, Commander, if I were you, I'd worry
about my own love life - or lack of it - instead of ours."

"Tom, I'm only saying this because I'm concerned."

"Yeah, well, concern yourself with something else.  Like
maybe strengthening the muscles in that hand and wrist of
yours.  From what I can see, they must be getting a fairly
good workout."

With that he'd stormed off, leaving me seething.  All right,
perhaps I shouldn't have interfered, but there was no need
for that.  Smart-assed arrogant shit.