Title: Triangles of the Heart
Author: Kim Riley a.k.a. MYSTIC
Pairings: (DS9/Voy) C/? P/?, B/?
Notes: Sequel to Dark Dreams and part IV of the Dark Desire series.
Disclaimer: Ok, as usual, none of these characters, besides Nolan
Osgood, belong to me, they belong to Paramount, and again I'm getting
them out of the `closet' to let them be happy.
Tom sat on the corner of the sofa in the room he now shared
with Chakotay, staring out into the dark vastness of space. //Lord,
what have I done? // He cried to himself. His reflection was now a
stranger to him as was his entire world. He reached up and touched
the warm moisture that was falling down his cheeks, and was startled
to find that his tears were now the color of blood. "Shit!" he cried
with frustration and some concern.
He moved to the bathroom and when he turned on the lights got
a better look at what Tom Paris had become. From the outside he
looked like an angle of sorts, but inside he felt twisted and dark,
but not completely.yet. He washed his face from the red stains not
wanting any sign of his crying. But the tears refused to stop
flowing as his mind whirled back to what he witnessed first hand.
It started shortly after their first night on board the Veil.
Tom had gotten up and out of habit scrounged for some food and after
eating it was immediately in the bathroom, now more of a luxury and
cover than a necessity, throwing up.
"I'm sorry, love. I thought I mentioned that our system will
reject most foods now," Chakotay said warmly as he came up behind the
young man caressing his back. "Our system only requires the nutrient
we get in the wine, that's why there's so much of it and we all learn
how to make it.in case."
"In case of what?" Tom asked innocently.
"In case we run out. We need to feed our hunger more than the
average person does, so to avoid.hurting anyone, we all know how to
make the drink. I'll show you. I was going to wait but perhaps I
should show you now," he smiled.
Tom followed his love out of the bathroom and sat down and
listened to what his lover and now Captain told him. The method was
relatively easy if not a bit gross, but.no one would have to die,
like in the old days. This pleased Tom and Chakotay very much. Then
after that was settled they both headed to the mess hall were the
crew gathered to share their so-called meal in attempts to keep some
sense of normality to their lives.
Tom and Chakotay arrived and saw Rebecca was already there
and waiting for them at the `Captain's' table. "Morning, Captain,"
she smiled warmly.
"Morning, Rebecca," Chakotay replied with just as much
Tom greeted her too, but couldn't help smile more at noticing
how much more relaxed Chakotay was around his new crew. //He wasn't
like this when he was in the Marquis, must be.something? // He
thought, but didn't care to go into it.
The three of them drank and talked about things to occur.
They were heading to the Alpha quadrant via a little known wormhole
two months away from their current location.
"Are you sure we shouldn't tell the Captain.err.Janeway," Tom
Chakotay smiled at his love, "If I tell her right now, she
may decide to interfere with our mission."
"Why would she. She doesn't even know what it is?" Tom
"Exactly. She's on edge as it is about what's happened over
you and me. She's suspicious of our wanting to accompany her and I'm
sure she is only bidding her time in attempts to find out. If I tell
her that I have the coordinates to a wormhole that will lead `us'
back to the Alpha quadrant her suspicions will quadruple. She'll
demand to know our intentions, and I don't plan on telling her. It's
none of her business. Thus she'll do what she always does and get her
hackles up and fear the worst and try and stop us."
Tom sat back, "I didn't think of that," he concluded. Then he
gave his most charming smile, "Guess that's why you're the Captain
and I'm just.your top pilot."
"He's only the Captain because he fucks well," a deep voice
growled out somewhere in the hall.
All the voices died as silence filled the room. Chakotay
looked around surveying the room to see if the one who spoke would
have the guts to face him. The guy did.
A tall, medium build man with reddish brown hair and a
matching goatee stood up. Tom knew he'd never seen the guy before,
but he didn't know over 90 percent of the crew, so this wasn't new.
He looked to see how Chakotay was going to handle the matter and was
not sure if he was nerved or glad at the amused smirk on the big
Chakotay looked the challenger in the eye and smiled
mischievously, "Why yes.I do fuck well. But that has nothing to do
with why I'm the Captain. I happen to be very qualified."
The challenger cut him off. "Qualified? My ass! You're a baby
compared to anyone here, anyone except your whore, that is."
Chakotay's eyes narrowed dangerously as he slowly raised up
from the table and moved around it. Tom wanted to get involved but a
hand from Rebecca and her mouthing the words, `let him handle it,'
kept him seated.
Chakotay was in the isle as was his challenger, calm,
collected and looking very fierce. "I suggest very strongly that you
apologize to Tom. He's the best pilot anyone of you will ever see,
and I don't care how old you are. As to my qualifications," he said
coolly as he took a slow step toward the other man. "I am Captain.
that is `all' you need to know. The rest will be proven, I'm sure in
time. Now.apologize then get back to work before I get angry."
Chakotay's words sent a chill down Tom's spine. He knew all
too well that Chakotay was really upset but not truly angry. He'd
seen the former Marquis angry once, not even on Voyager had he seen
that temper flare as hot and fierce as it could be. The other man
just didn't know how lucky he was getting off. He saw Chakotay look
his challenger in the eye then when he was sure his message had
gotten across he moved back toward the table. He was only twelve
steps away when everything went into slow motion.as far as Tom was
Tom's mind could process the events as they occurred not
knowing that to most of everyone else in the room it was a matter of
seconds. Tom saw the challenger change from man to beast and lunge
for Chakotay. Before a sound could be made, or Chakotay even move
another step the man seemed to hit something.like a barrier. Then
crumpled to the ground. Chakotay turned quickly and stared at the
man. The tall threat was now clutching at his throat then his chest
as if in server pain but for no apparent reason.
Tom caught a glimpse of darkness in his love's eyes that
frighten him. The gaze was intense, clear and focused on the man now
writhing in pain at his feet. Chakotay seemed pleased.too pleased
with this result. He then moved back to his seat and took up his
goblet as if no longer concerned about the man now screaming in pain
on the mess hall floor. Tom watched as Chakotay finished his drink
and gave a warm loving smile in Tom's direction and then looked calm
as he addressed the crew. "Anyone else wish to challenge me? No?
Well, we have work to do people. I suggest you get to it," he said
too calmly then gave Tom a kiss on the cheek as he headed out of the
Tom stared. Some seemed frightened by what was happening to
the man, still writhing in pain, as others seemed very pleased,
almost proud of what Chakotay had done. Tom turned to
Rebecca, "What's going on?" he asked with concern. "Why isn't anyone
doing anything to help that man?"
Rebecca placed a warm knowing hand on Tom's arm. "Chakotay
had to prove himself today, and that `man' dared to challenge him.
He's paying the price. Everyone on board needs to understand that,
just because Chakotay is.a child, in comparison to us, he `is'
Captain and capable of keeping that title. I told you, as did he,
Tom. Our world can be very dark at times, now is just one of those
"So, that man's just going to lay there in pain?" Tom asked
unsure of what he should do and what he wanted to do.
"No, Tom. He'll only be there in pain for a little longer
than it'll be over," she replied. But her tone was filled with
"What do you mean?" he asked unsure if he wanted to know.
"He'll be dead soon," she replied, this time making her
meaning clear. "The Captain is strong, stronger than anyone was
willing to give him credit for. He has made it clear, again, that he
is capable of keeping his position on this ship and that he `is'
qualified. Even our Lord has ruled with a heavy hand at times, but
only because he has had too." Rebecca senses Tom's distress. "Tom, I
know your upset at what just happened here, but he wasn't given a
choice. If he let that man live, it would have been viewed, as he was
weak and not capable of it. That alone is not a good sign in a
leader." She gave a sigh. "There is so much for you to learn, Tom.
But no matter how much you want to, you can't learn it all in one
day, much less one life time," she smiled warmly. "We have a shift.
Care to escort your first officer to her station?" she asked with
some levity, hoping to get Tom's mind off what was occurring around
him, it didn't work.
Tom nodded and took her arm, but his attention was on the man
on the floor who had stopped shouting and was now only twitching. As
he moved by with Rebecca pulling him along he finally turned to
her, "What.what did he do?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied honestly. "Since I can't do it, I
can't say. We all have different gifts that.suite our soul as it
were, but everyone is different. Since Lord Nolan was his creator his
is of strong blood, and since you are of him, you are too, but not to
the same degree."
Tom remained quiet for the rest of the journey to the bridge
and during his shift. He was glad that it was routine for his mind
was light years away taking everything in.
Janeway sat at her desk in her ready room while Tuvok had the
bridge. Her mind was filled with a thousand questions as to what
happened to Chakotay and now Tom. She kept thinking about the
readings Geron showed her when they met Chakotay at the inn.
According to the tricorder, the Commander was.dead? But that couldn't
be, for he was standing right in front of them as a live as anyone.
Then.then with only a thought the table flipped over and him shouting
that power would be the only reason `we'd' believe. //Why would he
think that? Chakotay has never been power hungry.so why? // Her mind
questioned for the hundredth time, still not coming up with an
//And Tom too? Why? // She asked her self, almost the same
amount of times as she asked the first question, still no answers.
The readings were given to the EMH and he couldn't make any sense out
of them. In fact, he had the audacity to ask if the Captain was
playing a joke on him. Her look changed his mind very quickly. He
told her the only way he'll learn anything concrete is to examine
either Commander Chakotay or Mister Paris in person. So that led to
her next question.//how? //
She sipped on her coffee as she continued to contemplate the
matter. //Chakotay's too smart of a man to fall for anything lame and
asking out right is not an option. He's obviously hiding something.
Plus, why is the Vamir so interested in the Alpha quadrant? Why is he
helping them? Why any of this? // She sighed and sat up, realizing
she was just going around in circles in her mind.
She looked over the pile of current reports that Tuvok had
handed her, missing the light banter she had with Chakotay about them
being due on time. She missed him, his presence, his.she was about to
say opinion when a light in the darkness finally turned on. //When
was the last time he gave an opinion? // She asked herself. This time
there was an answer, //better question, Kathryn is when was the last
time you listened to find out? //
She placed down her mug in shocked realization, //Damn! //
She finally realized that she had been pushing Chakotay away, almost
to the point of totally ignoring him. Hell, she had been ignoring him.
for Seven. //Shit! This is my fault! // She leaned into her hand as
the wave of reality struck her hard. //Oh, Chakotay, I'm sorry, //
she pleaded in her mind. But she knew it wouldn't do any good and
wasn't sure it wasn't already too late. She had pushed Chakotay away,
and though she was sure there was other reasons, this one was clear
and it made better sense than any quest for power.
//But Tom? // She wondered. There, again there were no
answers. Her face filled with grief and guilt as she moved the pile
of reports aside when one fell to the floor. When she picked it up
some of the lettering caught her eye, and she had an idea. //Harry
Julian had been in his office when he felt the strong
presence enter. He had plenty of practice at determining when others
like him more or less were about, in fact, he could now tell when
Changeling or hidden Jem Hadar were present too, but he never found a
logical way to explain that, so didn't. But this was no founder or
lackey sent by Vladimere.no this presence had power, enough to make
Julian nervous. He turned to see the origin of that presence walk in,
tall, dark complexion with uncustomary blue eyes. He knew his
adversary even if he didn't know the man. "Not here," was all Julian
Over the years, he had struggled to keep this portion of his
existence as far from DS9 as possible, always making up some
conference or scientific exploration or whatever to deal with this
mess. Of course, Vladimere eventually knew where Julian was located,
just like he knew where the self proclaimed Count was, and Julian did
know that it was the war that kept his area safe.but that no longer
seemed the case. Though Vladimere was permanently locked to the
Earth, he seemed to have found someone capable of doing his dirty
work for him. Julian felt his soul constrict, but he wouldn't go
down easily and certainly not here.
There was a slight feeling of relief when the strange
alluring man stopped and nodded, as if understanding the request.
Julian made up an errand that he was going to be attending too and to
contact Doctor Giranni should anyone need anything. Then he grabbed a
PADD, not caring what was on it and headed out of the infirmary
knowing that he would be followed. He walked purposeful down the
promenade not paying any obvious attention to the presence that
followed him and moved around to a dark hall and waited. When the man
joined him, Julian again found a source of unknown courage and
spoke, "I know where we can go, if you are willing?"
Cain had noticed Julian possessed a lot of power for one so
young and was growing in leaps and bounds compared to most of their
kind. Vladimere had told him of Julian's obsession of being a self
proclaimed Prince, and that he schemed to have everyone bow down to
his will. Cain was told a lot of things, and though he told
Vladimere that he'd take care of Julian, he never said how.not till
he saw first hand what the situation was, for he had lived far to
long to be manipulated by the likes of that butcher.one Count
He hadn't been too surprised to see how beautiful Julian
Bashir was, that was far from an uncommon trait among his kind, but
to hear he was a doctor, a healer in the midst of war.Starfleet no
less, that was what made Cain wonder at the truth of the situation.
Now seeing the dark beauty and his obvious concern not to involve
anyone in what was sure to be perceived as a conflict by the young
man was.touching. "Of course," Cain agreed, his voice even without
emotion, thousands of years of practice at work. He would let this
young one play his hand, not fearing for a second that this child
could hurt him in any manner, so much so that he would let Julian
take them there, "Were ever you like," he added.
Julian knew that the other man's confidence in himself wasn't
over exaggerated, for he could feel the power oozing from him. Julian
snapped out of his thoughts, someone was coming and there was no more
postponing what may be the inevitable. He waved his hand and a quick
fog of mist enveloped him and Cain and soon when it evaporated they
were in the bows of the station, where no one ever went.and the rest
of the people would be safe.
"What can I do for you?" he asked as calmly as he could.
Cain had every intention of testing this so-called Prince. If
he failed then what Cain was going to say next would be the
truth, "Die." Then he reached out his mind to envelop Julian in a
wall of illusions that the majority of his kind couldn't withstand
and the result would be fatal.
Julian found himself suddenly no longer on DS9 but in another
dark room alone with Cain. The tall alluring man was slowly
approaching him, his blue eyes inviting him in. His very presence was
becoming overwhelming, and Julian felt his body ache with need to
touch this man, even more so knowing that to do so could be
dangerous, even deadly. "What.what did you say?"
"I said," Cain said, his deep voice now husky with
desire, "Be mine," he finished as he moved next to Julian's slim form
and let their presence and awareness of each other crackle like heat
lighting before a storm. "You're a very beautiful man," Cain replied
as his strong slim fingers caressed Julian's face.
Julian wanted to move away from the touch, but it was like
fire and ice to his body and he found himself leaning into the touch
rather than away. Then he felt another strong hand unbuttoning his
shirt and caressing his chest. He couldn't help but release a very
soft moan, for the touch was overwhelming, and he craved more. His
mind was crying out to his body to just melt into this man'' arms
and let him take him anyway he wanted.
However, deep in Julian's mind he knew this was bad, that he
was in more danger than he could comprehend, and most of all he
needed help if he was to gain any control of the situation before it
was too late, for he was no fool, he was more than smart enough to be
scared shitless of this man even if his body was betraying him with
every moment that passed.
Tom was feeling much better after a few hours of flying, and it
helped to brighten his day when he received a personal communiqué
from Harry. Harry wanted to see him, talk, anything that could help
him understand what had happened. Tom was thinking how good it would
be to see his friend again, but knew he'd have to clear it with
Chakotay first. The man, his love, his Captain, was very.protective
of him, and when he allowed himself, he could understand why. If he
went to visit Harry, the Captain could try something, and Tom wasn't
a hundred percent sure that Chakotay would take it as calmly as his
old Captain might think. No, Chakotay had changed, that much was
certain, but in some way so had he.
There was a big part of him that wanted that familiar life of before,
but that meant not being with Chakotay, and that was totally
unacceptable. He wasn't sure how, but he'd find a way to deal with
Harry, and keep their friendship. In another few hours he'd be off
duty and he could talk with Cha about it. He made the tiny course
corrections with very little effort, but then he felt strange.
something was wrong. //Someone's in trouble! // His mind whirled. He
felt it, like a calling, a pulling that his soul couldn't deny.he
wanted to go.
Soon he was no longer sitting on the bridge of the Veil but
in a dark room and before him was the face of a man he thought long
gone from his life.Julian Bashir. //Julian! // He soul cried out. He
couldn't comprehend what was happening, only that Julian looked older
than he last saw him and he was being surrounded by some dark energy
that was.killing him. "Julian!" he shouted.
At the sound of a long forgotten voice, Julian snapped to
attention away from the illusion, and saw the face of his first true
love. He and Tom were at the Academy together, though Julian was in
medical school as Tom was about to graduate, but none the less they
had met there and fell in love. But fate was cruel and the two lovers
forever parted by situation and circumstance. He had heard rumors
that Voyager was not destroyed and lost in the Delta Quadrant.//Delta
quadrant! // His mind finally put the piece of the puzzle Nolan had
offered him together. Voyager and Nolan had crossed paths and he was
sending them home to help him! He was sending home Tom! "Tom!" he
replied weakly, but it was enough to snap him out of the mental
seduction that Cain was pouring over him.
Tom looked around still puzzled then saw a strange man that
was staring at him with a mixture of puzzlement, annoyance, and.
pride? Then he turned back to Julian, "What's going on? Are you
okay?" he fired off, feeling that his connection here would soon be
Julian only smiled, "I needed help, you came. I'm fine and
will be even better once you home, Tom."
Tom was about to ask more but felt his hold on this place
quickly sliping away and all he saw was Julian's warm smiling face.
Then the next thing he knew he was blinking up looking at a very
concerned Chakotay. "Cha?" he asked weakly.
"Tom!" he said with relief in his voice and love in his
eyes. "Are you are right? What happened?"
Tom took a moment to clear his head then looked around; he
was back in their quarters. "I.I'm not sure. The last thing I
remember was flying Veil and then I was in some strange room with.
with Julian?" Tom said as he slowly started to sit up and was glad
for his love's assistance.
"Who's Julian?" Chakotay asked, wondering if it was someone
on the ship he would have to deal with.
"Julian is.well, he and I were lovers a long time ago," Tom
said a bit shyly. "That was when I was just about time I ended my
career. Anyway, I was in some room and there was another strange man,
and I knew, I just knew Julian was in danger and this other man was
killing him. But when I got there Julian suddenly opened his eyes,
and all was fine. Strange, if you ask me."
Chakotay narrowed his brow, "You know as much about why we
are going to the Alpha quadrant as I, do you think.this.this has
anything to do with it?"
"I'm not sure. I know that the quadrant is in danger due to
the one called Vladimere's desire to control it and try and establish
the old ways of power that would throw the quadrant into chaos and
blood shed. I also know that the rightful Prince, according to Nolan
is out there.alone dealing with it." Tom's word trailed off. "That.it
couldn't be," Tom insisted. "That would be far to close of a
Chakotay looked suddenly a mixture of concern and jealous,
only part of which Tom liked, but only a part. Then Chakotay too
easily schooled his expression for Tom's liking, but Tom wasn't ready
to confront this now, if ever. //One day at a time, Paris.one day at
a time. //
"I'll contact, my Lord. Why don't you rest," he smiled
easily, as he helped Tom get comfortable. "Rest and I'll see what I
can find out," he promised then left Tom with his thoughts.
//Why is Chakotay always saying, `My Lord'? Everyone else
says his Lordship or our Lord? // Tom thought this was a trivial
matter, but it was nagging at him something fierce. He was going to
try and rest and just forget about it so shifted to his side and
closed his eyes.
Julian was a mixture of relieved and saddened that it was Tom
that came to him in his need of help. He never stopped loving the man
and seeing him again brought up old feelings; but did Tom have what
it took for this existence? He would have to think about that later,
if he could, for he still had Cain to deal with and Cain truly
outmatched him and they both knew it.
"Why?" was all Julia asked.
Cain had seen the young Prince, for he now knew the truth,
for only a Prince could call in assistance at so great a distance
when the need arises. That `was' exactly what he was looking to see
if it would happen. Cain didn't think it would for beside himself,
any other of their kind was by Vladimere's doing, so he didn't think
there would be anyone to come to his aid. He couldn't but help
feeling glad he was wrong. "First, let me apologize, young.Prince,"
Cain said giving a very proper bow.
Julian arched his brow in Vulcan fashion and couldn't help
but wonder what was this guy up to now.
"I was told many things back on Earth and wanted to see for
myself if any of it was true. So.I tested you. Had you of failed,
well, sadly you would have died. But since you still stand, and only
by the Powers possessed by a Prince among our kind is that possible,
than your claim stands true and at least some of the accusations
against you stand false," Cain said very properly as if nothing bad
had almost occurred and it was all a matter of business.
Julian narrowed his eyes at the alluring stranger, "Who are
you? I know Vladimere sent you, but from what I'm hearing and
feeling, you are no lackey to the likes of him."
Cain smiled, //the young one is bright as he is
beautiful. // "I do not know how versed you have become on our kind,
young Prince. But I am Cain."
The very name caused Julian to pale as realization of truly
how close to true death he had just came and still could face. "Cain?
They.Cain?" he asked, his nervousness clear in his voice, though he
was able to school his form.
Cain could see that the young one was versed in some
knowledge of him from the reaction. "Yes," he chuckled. "They.Cain."
"But." Julian stopped. He needed to take a moment and gather
himself before continuing. "But you are to be in sleep? Why are you
awake?" he asked, fearing he knew the answer all too well.
"It would seem, young Prince, that Vladimere fears you more
than he is willing to let on," Cain smiled. "He found a way to reach
me and convinced me.well to at least check things out for myself.
Since you are a Prince, and there has not been a true Prince since my
time.that would only mean one thing. Nolan."
Julian heard the disdain in Cain's voice, and he felt a knot
in his stomach. But he wasn't about to lie, there was no need, but he
would be careful. "Yes, Lord Nolan is the one that.well you know, but
not by regular means."
This had Cain's attention, "What do you mean, he created you
and not by regular means? You didn't summon forth one of entities and
took its power?"
Julian had heard only a bit about the first one that took the
powers from Dark Haven back to this universe and a lot more of how
Vladimere did it. So by Cain's very words, he knew that the Count
didn't give Cain the full picture at all. "No, I didn't. Nolan sought
me out, and." he let his voice trail to brace himself not sure how
Cain would react to what he was about to say. "He and the others are
no longer stuck in the shadows of our dreams. Dark Haven is now real."
"Impossible!" Cain growled dangerously.
"No it is not!" Julian snapped back. He knew he couldn't
really win an all out battle against this one, but he sure wouldn't
cower either. "Dark Haven is formed, but in the Delta Quadrant."
Julian almost let slip that if he wanted proof just wait a few
months, but that would be foolish.
Cain sized Julian up, and to his dismay saw that they young
Price was telling the truth. "So be it," he replied softly.
"Are you for or against what is going to happen?" Julian
asked, wanting to know who all his enemies would be. If Cain was
against what was going to occur, his chance of success was very
small, but if he was for.
"Neither," Cain stated flatly. "I came to see for myself if
certain things were true or not. You are young, but you are the
Prince much to Vladimere's displeasure. As to this.battle, it doesn't
Julian felt a pang of loss, Cain could have been a great
ally, but it was just as good not to have him as an enemy. "So, then
what will you do?"
"I haven't decided yet. But I can tell you this much," Cain
replied as he took a few steps easily forward. "When I do.you'll be
the first to know," he said in a very seductive voice, then like a
breath of fresh air he was gone like the wind, leaving Julian to
wonder about his words and the fate of the Alpha Quadrant.
Tom couldn't stand it, he wasn't tired and he wanted to know
more of what was going on so he got up to look for his love. He moved
to the living room and for the first time noticed an doorway that
wasn't there, or least he had noticed, the last time he was in the
room, and that was this morning. He moved very quietly, suddenly not
wanting to be seen or heard. He slowly made his way to the open
archway and saw the flickering of candle lights all about.
Tom was just at the edge of the room and saw Chakotay moving
about the odd room with reverence. Tom wasn't sure, but he could have
sworn that Chakotay looked in his direction but made no indication of
seeing him. Tom watched as Chakotay lit the last of some of the
bigger candles that filled the room. The room was the size of the
bedroom, three walls filled with a tier of candles all lit, but three
of them highly decorated with strange symbols.
It was then that Tom noticed that there were strange symbols
on the wall and on the floor in the center and he had never seen such
things before. He wasn't sure, but his instinct told him to remain
quiet as he watched Chakotay continue with what ever he was doing.
Chakotay finished with lighting the last of the larger
decorated candles then moved to the doorway where a small table stood
bare. He then proceeded to remove all his cloths and fold them neatly
and place them on the table. Tom couldn't help but make mental note
that that was so Chakotay. But seeing the older man kneel in the
center of the symbol on the floor made Tom uneasy for some reason,
but he continued to watch.
After a few minutes of Chakotay looking like he was praying,
he began to sweat. That wouldn't have been a big deal perhaps a month
ago, but now it was for they.their kind didn't sweat. If they gave
off any moisture it was a blood like substance and that was not what
was forming off his love's skin. Again, his instincts told him to
remain silent and still and watch. He continued to do so as he saw
the sweat roll down Cha's dark bronzed body and pool on the floor
then turn to mist.
After what felt like a small eternity, the mist filled the
room then seemed to solidify in front of Chakotay and suddenly there
was Lord Nolan, in person.all this distance, he was here. Tom stared
with some disbelief. He saw Nolan reach out and caress Tom's
Chakotay's face like a lover would, and Tom felt his own hackles
raise, but again he remained silent. He then saw slim fingers gently
pull on Chakotay's chin and the older man opened his eyes.
Tom's heart and soul constricted at the sight of the look in
Chakotay's eyes. It was a look of worship, love, admiration beyond
all sense, and it was for Nolan. //He's mine!" Tom's mind shouted.
But he remained were he was unmoving.
Nolan gently gestured for Chakotay to stand up and when he
did leaned in and drank deeply of his firm lips as strong arms
wrapped around him. He let his slim fingers trace the strong muscles
in Chakotay's back pulling his body closer and allowing the other man
to freely take of him.
Tom couldn't believe that his.his Chakotay was kissing,
touching, caressing Lord Nolan not only like a lover, but as if they.
they had been lovers. But seeing the passion not only in Chakotay's
eyes, but his actions was more than convincing that this was not the
first time being with each other. Then Tom's mind whirled some more
as he watched Chakotay kiss his way down Nolan's strong slim muscular
body, parting the robe just enough so he could touch and kiss Nolan's
The jealous fire that was burning in Tom only flamed more as
he watched Chakotay take Nolan's erection into his mouth and
pleasured him in ways that Chakotay had not done to him. In fact, it
was Tom that would be in Chakotay's place if it were just the two of
them. Seeing his love and lover doing for Nolan what he hadn't,
possibility wouldn't, do for him only fueled the anger
more. //Chakotay is mine!// Tom's mind shouted again, feeling a sense
of betrayal since he gave everything up for that man, only to find
out that.that Chakotay wasn't.what faithful? His alone? //Yes, damn
it! I gave up my world for him, how can he do this?//
Tom was taken back by the voice that he heard in his
head, //He does it for he is mine,// the familiar voice stated. It
was then that he noticed Nolan was staring right at him as Chakotay
was still worshiping his body. //Chakotay is mine, as `you' are his.
Make no mistake little one, I love my love's well and let them have
their.toys, but I will not tolerate interference. Also remember, life
is far from short to spend on just one love, now isn't it.//
Tom couldn't help but winch and seethe at the smirk he saw
Nolan gave him as he raised Chakotay off his knees and gave him what
is know among their kind as a `real' kiss. The penetrating of the
flesh and drawing of blood. The erotic sensation had no equal and
thus was said to be like a lover's kiss. Nolan was making sure that
Tom understood, Chakotay could have other lovers, but belonged to him
and him alone.
That was how come Tom was not in the bathroom crying, his
soul all a wreck. He didn't know what to do, if he could do anything.
But what he did know was that he loved Chakotay but couldn't deal
with sharing him. //He's my love.my destiny!// Tom's mind shouted
over and over as he cried harder. To wondered how he was going to
face Chakotay, and how the other man would react to him knowing. A
part of him was afraid of finding out but another part of him had to
deal with this.
Tom felt lost, alone as he slid back against the wall and
down to the floor. //I so wish I had someone to talk with about all
this.// Tom felt more alone that he ever did in his life.err,
existence. Part of him wanted to reach out and see if Julian was
real, another part of him wanted to shake Chakotay till he came to
his senses, while another wanted to turn back the clock and say no to
all this. //But it's too late. Once you're a member.you can't go
back,// he reminded himself, the same words Chakotay had said to
him. //Why? Why didn't he tell me?// Tom wanted to know. He deserved
With a fire he didn't realize he had he gathered himself
together and moved back out to find Chakotay, not caring if he was
still with Nolan. He had a right to know the truth and he was going
to get it. To his relief, Chakotay was sealing up the room that to
most would look just like another wall, all dressed and in a good
mood. This only fueled his anger more. "Damn you, bastard! Why didn't
you tell me? Didn't you think `I' had a right to know!" he shouted.
Chakotay turned and looked puzzled at Tom and his
anger. "Know what?" he asked in that irritating calm manner.
"Oh, I don't know.. That you are cheating on me? That our
relationship is far from exclusive? Pick one!"
Chakotay stood there a moment then like an epiphany," Ah,
this is about my Lord Nolan," he said easily, as if Tom had just
simply misunderstood things.
This only served to irritate Tom more, "What is it with you
always saying.my lord? And yes, it's about Nolan. How can you stand
there and act like it's nothing?" The hurt and anger was all to
clear on Tom's face, as that what now served as tears flowed down his
Chakotay took a step toward Tom as if to sooth a
child, "Love, don't be like this. I don't see why your so upset. Tom,
you're my love and Nolan is my Lord. I belong to him."
Tom was floored by how easily Chakotay just said that he
belonged to Nolan. Chakotay, belonging to anyone.like property was
unthinkable. "You are `my' love! `My' destiny! How can you stand
there and feel it's okay that you.you.ahhhh!" Tom shouted. The look
of puzzlement on Chakotay's face was driving Tom mad. //He doesn't
get it? He just doesn't get it?// Tom thought.
"Tom.it's just the way things are. Why are you so upset.
We're together and we will be for a long time, nothing is going to
change that," Chakotay said, trying to ease Tom's anger.
"Until Nolan decides otherwise," Tom snapped.
"He wouldn't do that."
"And what makes you so sure he wouldn't?" Tom asked not sure
what to believe anymore.
"Because he won't," Chakotay replied easily with conviction.
Tom wasn't sure what scared him more, Chakotay's sudden, if
sudden, blind devotion to Nolan or the dark anger of hate that was
filling him toward the Lord. //I need some space.to think about
this,// he thought. "I.I can't handle this," Tom stated.
"Tom, please," Chakotay tried to say but was cut off.
"Cha, I need something familiar around me, and I'm not
finding anything here I want to be around at the moment. I'm going to
contact Voyager and go see Harry. I `need' to see if.see things I can
handle. This isn't .." He growled he was getting frustrated beyond
"Tom, it isn't safe."
"Harry wouldn't do anything you know that!" Tom snapped
back. "And I have to get out of here," Tom said as he hurried out of
Janeway was going over some reports in her office when her
com unit beeped. "Yes," she replied.
"Sorry, to disturb you, Captain," Harry stated. "but I
thought you would want to know. I Just heard from Tom. He's coming
Janeway couldn't help but grin, "Thank you, Ensign. I'll
notify Mr. Tuvok and we'll put our plan into action. And Harry." she
"You know this is for the best don't you?"
"Yes, Captain. I.I just want Tom back," he stated, not even
bothering to mention the Commander.
Janeway knew there were a lot of deep seeded feelings in the
young Ensign, and a part of her hated using them in this manner, but
if she were to get her crew back and to the bottom of this mess, she
had little choice. "We will, Mr. Kim. We will."