Pairing C/P C/others
NC-17 ***WARNING*** This is NOT a nice story, there is rape and pain and psychological torture.
Set shortly after the Jonas incident.
Archive: Cha-club, TPDorm, and Paris Nights only.
Disclaimer: The boyz don't belong to me (all hail mighty paramount) but this story does!
Hostage by Morticia
Kathryn Janeway looked solemnly around the faces of her senior staff and then slowly she allowed a wide smile to infuse her features.
"He did it," she said quietly and enjoyed the dawning realisation on their faces.
"Tom found Chakotay?" BíElanna asked excitedly
"I have just received an official complaint from the Qren Government."
"YES!" Harry whooped and then flushed, "sorry, Captain."
Kathryn gave him an understanding smile, "I think a little exuberance can be allowed Harry. The Qren have Neelixís ship under quarantine and say there are two occupants."
"Are they going to allow us to come back and collect them though? They were very explicit about refusing a second rescue attempt," Tuvok asked.
"They have held the ship in quarantine for 48 hours and are satisfied that even if Tom and Chakotay ARE infected with this supposed virus, they are not obviously homicidal since they are both still alive. They arenít prepared to run the risk of contamination themselves but have said that since Tom wasnít acting under orders, we can make our own decision whether to bring them on board."
"Well thatís great, then. Tom genuinely thought we had all fallen for his routine again. He acted on his own when we all told him we were leaving." BíElanna said with a feral grin.
"It really hurt him," Harry snapped back "I only hope heíll understand why we did it and forgive us."
"It was my decision to leave him out of the loop, Harry. When our first rescue attempt failed the Qren refused to let us try again. They threatened to shoot us down as potential disease carriers if Voyager re-entered the grid. I knew they would detect a ship as large as Voyager so I couldnít take the risk."
"I donít understand why we couldnít tell Tom the truth though," Harry said sadly.
"The Qren ordered us not to make another attempt at rescuing Chakotay. Itís only the fact that I proved to them that Tom acted independently that is allowing us the chance to retrieve him. They are so impressed by Tomís lone act of self-sacrifice that they are prepared to give him a chance of survival. Had he been simply acting under orders I believe they would have destroyed the ship as soon as it emerged."
"I have arranged the quarantine area in sickbay, Captain. Of course itís impossible to guarantee the crewís safety until we have some idea of exactly what form the infection takes," the Doctor said pompously.
"We will quarantine the whole deck. BíElanna has already isolated the air filters so that there can be no airborne contamination. Only you will have any contact with them. The Qren say that both Tom and Chakotay are alive. Chakotay has been exposed to this infection for six weeks and Tom for nearly a month. The fact that they are still alive suggests that the disease is not necessarily fatal after all. The important thing now is to get them on board and then take it from there."
Neelix tapped his fingers nervously on the table and cleared his throat.
"Yes, Neelix?" Kathryn said with an encouraging smile.
"I donít want to speak out of place, Captain, but Iím still a little confused about all this."
"In what way?"
"Well, you have obviously accepted that the disease is real and could have been fatal and you knew Chakotay was already exposed to it so Tom was likely to be flying to his own death. The chances of him saving Chakotay were so slim that I can only assume that Tomís own life meant nothing to you."
Before Kathryn could reply, Kes turned to Neelix and took one of his hands in her own.
"Tom HAD to try, Neelix. The captain knew that. You saw how Tom fell apart when Chakotay was left behind. He would never have recovered from the loss."
"I donít understand," Neelix said in confusion, "you make it sound like they were in love with each other and everyone knows they couldnít even stand in the same room without fighting."
"Chakotay has been in love with Tom since the Maquis," BíElanna said quietly.
Neelix gaped. "You mean all that aggression was just passion?"
"I didnít see it myself either," Kathryn confessed, "it was only the way Tom behaved after the Bírechík took Chakotay that gave me a clue. I thought both he and Chakotay really hated each other. I couldnít understand why he was so distraught."
"Logical, since Lieutenant Paris doesnít understand his own feelings either." Tuvok added.
"So Chakotay loves Tom but pretends he doesnít to everyone else and Tom loves Chakotay but pretends he doesnít to himself?"
"Humans are very confusing," Neelix concluded.
"Undoubtedly," Tuvok agreed.
"Tom, TOM, wake up!" Chakotay gasped excitedly. The effort of speaking in the thin air made him choke a little and it was the heaving of his chest muscles that finally broke into Tomís haze.
Blue eyes fluttered open, blinked a little and then closed again as Tom snuggled back into his arms with a little sigh.
"Itís Voyager, Tom, on the viewscreen, LOOK!" Chakotay managed before a coughing fit left him too weak to say any more.
Tomís bleary eyes opened again, slowly focused on the ship, gradually passed the appropriate message to his brain and his mouth opened to emit a low growl.
"Tom?" Chakotay asked in confusion as the growl deepened and lengthened.
Tom raised his head off Chakotayís shoulder with effort. He looked at Chakotay, looked at the approaching ship and began to snarl in earnest, his teeth bared.
"Whatís wrong, Tom?" Chakotay pleaded even as Tomís alarm stirred his own need to protect his kítech.
"Youíre MINE," Tom hissed.
"Two weak life signs registering, Captain. It appears that the ship is badly damaged and they are rapidly running out of breathable air. However, the life signs are NOT human," Tuvok intoned.
A gasp of horror from Harry filled the sudden silence in the bridge. For a long moment no one spoke as hope died.
"Is it possible that this Ďdiseaseí could have altered them sufficiently for them to read as non-human?" Kathryn finally asked.
"Only if it has caused a mutation at the genetic level, in which case they may no longer BE the Commander and the Lieutenant anymore. It is also possible that the ship is actually piloted by Bírechík. The Bírechík may have taken the ship from Mr. Paris." Tuvok replied.
"Is the quarantine barrier completely impervious to physical penetration?" Kathryn asked
"Then lock on to the life-forms and beam them aboard. Even if they are Bírechík, they may know what has happened to Chakotay and Tom."
Chakotay felt the tingle of the transporter beam and he roared in fury. His body had reacted to Tomís feeling of threat and had swamped him with adrenaline. There was danger to his kítech. He had to fight. He had to protect the source of the essence.
He grabbed Tom and pulled him close to his body, tucking him firmly into his side so that his arms were free to fight.
He screamed in defiance as their molecules dissolved and rematerialised in an alien room. Then he saw the Bírechík who would steal his kítech. A puny balding Bírechík who was no larger than his kítech. He pushed Tom protectively behind him and charged with a deafening howl.
"Report," Kathryn ordered stiffly, only her paleness betraying her own shock.
"Although their appearance is completely alien, there is sufficient of their original DNA remaining to conclusively prove that they ARE Chakotay and Paris."
"What the hell has happened to them?"
"They have been changed at a genetic level. The changes are not only physical but mental as well."
"You say there is no risk of contamination from them?"
"What I SAID was that the disease is not airborne. It requires direct exchange of bodily fluids. Primarily it appears to be a sexually transmitted disease. It IS possible that infection could occur through saliva exchange.
"Furthermore, the changes in the Commander are not only physically different from those in Lieutenant Paris but also chemically different. They appear to have developed a symbiotic relationship. They are mutually addicted to the chemicals they each produce."
"And these chemicals are exchanged sexually?"
"At regular intervals. When the Commander attempted to attack me he was rendered unconscious by the force field. I took the opportunity to separate them into isolated quarantine areas. Quite apart from the mental anguish this created in them both, within seven hours I detected severe physical withdrawal symptoms in them both. By nine hours they were in extreme physical discomfort. Had I failed to release the barrier and allow them sexual contact, I believe they would have literally died."
"The Qren said the disease was fatal."
"They made an assumption based on inadequate information. As far as I can ascertain, as long as a Bírechík AND a kítech are together they can survive indefinitely."
"But only as a sexual couple."
"Have either of them spoken yet?"
"No. The Commander seems to see me as a rival for Tomís affection. I obviously look like another Bírechík to him. He has repeatedly attacked me whenever I attempted to approach. I made an adaptation to my program and changed my appearance so that I was blond instead."
"And that time Tom attacked me instead."
Kathryn rubbed her face tiredly.
"Perhaps they wouldnít be threatened by me," she finally said.
"I strongly advise you not to try. When I pretended to be a Kítech, Tom bit me very savagely. To be honest he attacked me like a rabid dog. If he were to bite you, there is a chance you would catch the infection."
Kathryn paled further at his words but straightened her shoulders decisively.
"So we will just have to wait until you cure them to find out their story. In the meantime I will keep a complete communications blackout and the quarantine restriction will continue to be applied to the whole deck. I donít want to run the risk of anyone finding out about this."
"You can be assured of my complete discretion."
"I had better be." Kathryn snapped, horrified at the thought of the nature of Tom and Chakotayís infliction becoming public knowledge. God alone knew how they would deal with what had happened to them anyway without them being subjected to rumour and speculation too.
"Have you made them comfortable?" She asked.
"Given Chakotayís extreme size I have been unable to provide them with a bed, but they do not seem unduly concerned with niceties anyway, they seem content with the floor. They have no more awareness than animals when they copulate."
Kathrynís eyes flashed dangerously. "COMMANDER Chakotay and LIEUTENANT Paris are senior officers on this ship. You will replicate whatever is necessary to treat them with the basic dignities that HUMAN BEINGS deserve."
The Doctor looked at her askance. "In view of Voyagerís energy restrictions and the fact th-"
"Sod the energy restrictions, Doctor. Members of my crew will NOT be kept like animals. Do you understand me?"
"Yes, Captain," the chastened Doctor agreed.
"Chak?" Tom whimpered quietly.
The tremor in Tomís voice broke through Chakotayís dozing and sent a fresh rush of adrenaline through his body. His kítech was distressed, his kítech was threatened. He sat up in panic but could detect no threat. The strange Bírechík was gone.
"Where are we?" Tom asked
Chakotay shook his huge head in bewilderment. He kept catching the tail end of a stray thought. He knew if he could just hone in on that elusive thread that the answer Tom wanted would be within his grasp, yet Tomís very distress prevented him from being able to concentrate enough to catch it.
"I donít know," he finally confessed and Tom trembled in his arms.
The invisible barrier that had separated them for so many hours had broken something in Tom. He now wouldnít let Chakotay move even an inch from him for fear that the invisible barrier would separate them again. Even when his body had insisted that he should eliminate waste he had dragged his Bírechík with him.
The inability to physically separate himself from his kítech meant that Chakotay couldnít escape Tomís fear and the way it flooded his body with the imperative to protect.
Like an electrical circuit, the loop of Tomís fear and Chakotayís rage fed endlessly upon itself and they descended further into blind animalistic madness.
"We have to separate them," the Doctor told the Captain.
Kathryn looked at him in horror.
"You said they would die if they were separated."
"Completely separated, yes, but the actual sexual transfer only takes two periods of about four hours each day. The rest of the time their constant contact seems to be harmful. They are effectively overdosing by remaining together."
"How successful have you been in your search for a cure?"
"Iím making definite progress. I have managed to isolate the DNA strands that have caused the change but itís a long process to unravel their secrets. In the meantime, I honestly think that the REAL Tom and Chakotay are being seriously harmed by their constant contact with each other. Unless we start breaking the cycle of dependence even a cure to the disease wonít be enough to repair the mental damage."
"How are you going to separate them?"
"I will create a smaller quarantine area for Tom. After their sexual contact I will simply transport Tom back into the other area."
Kathryn shuddered at the distress this would inevitably cause the men but she bowed to the Doctorís opinion. It had been three weeks now and as far as she could see both Tom and Chakotay were only getting worse.
"Very well, keep me posted."
For the first two days the Doctor was sure he had made a terrible error. Whenever he separated the two men, Tom would howl and wail and throw himself over and over at the force field in a vain attempt to return to Chakotay. Chakotay in turn would go ballistic and attack the barrier back with the fury of an enraged bull.
Yet the Doctor persisted, closing his ears to Tomís screams of anguish and Chakotayís bellows of outrage. He changed the property of the force field to eliminate sounds and yet still Tomís now silent screams elicited a crazed response in the Commander.
On the third day, his gamble began to pay off when his experiments with the DNA showed him that the sense of smell was an essential part of the change. He changed the force field to prevent the penetration of odours. Then he transported Tom and noted that this time after his initial outrage Chakotay settled back down and was barely moved by Tomís continuing silent anguish.
Unable to elicit a response from Chakotay, Tom finally gave up his attempt to penetrate the barrier and curled into a ball of misery on the floor.
On the fourth day, the Doctor waited until Tom had again given up his attempts to keep Chakotayís attention and then he walked into Chakotayís cell. For a moment the familiar rage flashed in Chakotayís black eyes and then the fire died and was replaced by a definite spark of intelligence.
"Commander?" The Doctor said softly.
Chakotay blinked, shook his head and then finally focused.
"Doctor? Where Ė where - "
"Youíre on Voyager, Commander. Youíve been back for nearly a month."
"A month?" Chakotay queried in disbelief then he jumped to his feet in agitation "Whereís Tom?"
The Doctor gestured to where Tom was sat rocking silently, his arms hugging his knees, face buried by his unbound hair.
Chakotay rushed forward in concern only to find a force field preventing his approach.
"What have you done to him?" he snarled, "Let me through."
"No. Separating you has been the only way to break through to you, Commander. Itís as though his constant presence prevents your ability to think."
Chakotay considered the Doctorís words.
"He is frightened and his fear blinds me, I become pure emotion," he finally said and the Doctor sighed with relief at the fact that Chakotay could actually manage an abstract thought once more.
"I have NEARLY found a cure but thereís something that keeps eluding me. I need your help, Chakotay. I donít understand enough about this disease. I need you to tell me everything you know about it."
"How do you feel, Tom?"
Tom blinked as the Captainís gentle voice slowly penetrated his haze. He cautiously opened his eyes and focused on her face. To his surprise she was smiling at him kindly.
"Iím on Voyager again?" He asked
"Yes, Tom, youíre home." She replied and squeezed his hand.
He was a little bewildered by her attitude, considering he distinctly recalled that his parting words to her had been something on the lines of "Youíre a heartless bitch".
"What happened?" he asked.
"What do you remember?" she countered.
"I went after Chakotay and Ė " his voice trailed off as memory returned in all its humiliating detail.
Kathryn saw the way he paled and then flushed and she squeezed his hand again.
"Is Ė is he okay?" Tom mumbled
"Heís fine, Tom. The Doctor had to synchronise your cures obviously, but he treated Chakotay first and he woke up a couple of hours ago."
"Does he Ė does he look Ė "
"Not yet," Kathryn interrupted, understanding Tomís question.
"The Doctor is still devising a means to return you both to your original appearance. He has however removed the chemical addiction from your bodies. You may still both look Ďchangedí but your dependence on each other has been severed."
"Where is he?" Tom asked in a small voice, stunned by how empty he felt. Where was the relief? He was cured, so why the hell did he feel so damned bad?
"He returned to his quarters. He said he needed to meditate. Now you are no longer contagious, thereís no reason why you canít return to your quarters too."
He left without me, Tom realised and the thought knifed him. He couldnít fucking wait to escape me. He felt tears prickling at his eyes and he shook his head furiously.
"Iíd like that, Captain," he said meekly and then he flushed again, "Oh, do I still have quarters?" he asked nervously as he remembered how he had left.
"I think I need to tell you the truth now, Tom," Kathryn said.
Chakotay stared in his mirror in disbelief. He had KNOWN he had changed of course but it hadnít really been real because he hadnít really been himself. Now his mind was restored he could only look in horror at what he had become.
The Doctor said it was only a matter of time before he found a way to restore his previous looks.
He couldnít restore his tattoo though. Sure it could be replicated cosmetically but it wasnít the same. It was an integral part of his identity but it had never been the actual mark that had mattered. That had only been an outward sign of a spiritual change. Restoring the tattoo would not rebuild the roots that had linked it with his soul.
Chakotay wasn't sure he still had a soul.
He had even lied to the Captain. He had said he wanted to meditate. The truth was he had simply wanted to hide. He couldnít bear to stay as Tom woke and realisation dawned in those blue eyes.
His kítech was gone now. Tom Paris was back and if the pilot had hated him before, only the spirits knew what new resentment would be revealed in that face. The disease had tricked Tom into thinking that he wanted to be the sexual slave of a man he hated.
Tom would never forgive him.
Surely tomorrow was soon enough to face the scorn and humiliated resentment of the man he loved.