Title: Things Change 9
Author: Maxine
Pairing C/P
Rating R
Disclaimer: Paramount owns them,
I just wanted to have a little fun.
Feedback: Why not? I can take it
plainedge77@yahoo.com
Warning: Major character death in
this part.
Things Change 9
Once Tom was finished unpacking he
joined Chakotay and the
rest in the living room. Chakotay
moved to make room for him to sit
next to him, when he did Chakotay
immediately put his arm around him
and pulled him into his embrace.
Tom let out a soft sigh, he liked
being in Chakotay's arms. He looked
at the others in the room and saw
that they were okay with the scene
before them, he relaxed even more.
"All done?" Chakotay asked placing
a kiss on the side of
Tom's forehead.
"Hmm, yeah for now." Tom closed his
eyes briefly just
enjoying the feel of the man sitting
next to him.
"Tom did you think Harry finally
got the message?" Ken asked.
"I don't know Ken but to be perfectly
honest I don't really
care. Whatever his problem is, it's
his not mine." Tom sighed and
snuggled in closer to Chakotay,
he didn't want to think about Harry
anymore tonight.
"I can understand that. It's just
too bad he turned out to be
such a prick. I would have like
to get to know him better, not now
though." Ken seemed a bit too resigned
for Tom.
"Ken are you or were you interested
in Harry?" Tom was really
curious about this turn of events.
"Well let's just say that until Chak
had his heart attack and
Harry started acting like an asshole,
I was contemplating the idea of
asking you if you thought Harry
would be interested in me." Ken
really hated having to admit that,
he couldn't bring himself to look
at anyone for a moment.
"Wow! Now that is a surprise." Tom
just couldn't believe it.
"Well it doesn't matter now, even
if I hadn't threaten to
kick the crap out of him, I don't
think I would comfortable with him
knowing how he feels about certain
things."
"Yeah well the kicking the crap out
of him idea could put a
damper on things. But don't discount
Harry completely Ken. He is
really just angry with me, he isn't
angry with any of you." Tom could
not believe he was defending Harry
after everything that happened,
but if he could help his former
friend find happiness elsewhere he
would.
"No Tom you don't get it. Just think
about this for a minute.
Harry got pissed at you because
you wanted to make friends with
people besides him. Can you honestly
say that he would not have a
problem with anyone he was involved
with and them having friends?
Other people to do things with besides
him? I mean come on, I
couldn't see myself giving up any
one of my friends just to be with
someone. No matter what I felt for
them." Ken was frustrated he had
been angry for weeks. Angry with
himself for being fool enough to be
interested in someone like Harry.
Angry with Harry for disappointing
him.
"Ken, if you were interested in Harry
why did you threaten
for hit him? I don't understand."
Gerron asked seemingly truly
confused.
"Why? Because I was pissed at him,
pissed that he wasn't what
I had hoped he was, what I thought
he was. I always thought he was
this great guy, I mean he didn't
seem to care about Tom's past.
Knowing that I figured there was
a possibility he would see passed my
screwed up past also. But instead
what I ended up seeing was this
shallow self-centered prick and
he said some really shitty things
about Chakotay."
"He said those things to get me angry
Ken, I don't think he
really meant them."
"Tom how can you defend him? After
all the crap he laid on
you."
"Ken, Harry was my friend when there
was no one else. Okay it
was for a selfish reason in the
long run, but that doesn't negate the
fact that when no one else wanted
to have anything to do with me
Harry did. I can't forget that and
I wouldn't." Hearing the serenity
in Tom's voice Chakotay, who had
been silently wishing he could break
Harry Kim's neck, hugged the younger
man.
"Well none of that matters now, I
will not set myself up to
be hurt like Harry hurt you. I have
no intention of telling my
friends sorry but my lover doesn't
want me to have anyone but him in
my life."
"You don't know he will do that Ken.
It's different, you have
friends, people who you have been
through hell with. People who have
been there for you when things were
so bad you didn't want to go
through another day. Harry knows
that, he wouldn't ask you to give
them up." Tom truly believed that.
"Okay, let's just say that he wouldn't
have a problem with me
having other people I want to be
with. He isn't going to forget that
I threatened to space him."
"Well that might be a problem but
Ken you might regret not
finding out." Greg finally had enough
of Ken's little pity party.
"Just find out Ken, the worst that
could happen is he will
deck you. Which by the way no one
would blame him for." Greg laughed
and the rest joined in.
"Yeah well I will think about it.
But now I have to go, I
have a date with my pillow." Ken
stood and shook hands with the four
men.
"Chakotay, Tom, I am happy for you
two I am sure everything
will work out for you. You are both
too damn stubborn for them not
too. Good Night."
"Thanks Ken, Good Night." Chakotay
and Tom said together.
"Damn talk about your revelations!
I had no idea Ken was
interested in Harry." Greg was still
shocked at his friend's
confession.
"Oh, come on Greg, I can't believe
you had no idea." Gerron
laughed
"You telling me you did?" Greg pulled
him on to his lap and
gave him a hug.
"Of course I did, all you had to
do was watch him. As soon as
Harry would walk into Sandrine's
or the Resort and Ken would sit
straight up and watch his every
move. I really think at one point he
was jealous of Tom. I could see
him sitting there and I would swear I
saw smoke coming out of his ears.
I think he thought Tom and Harry
were lovers." The young bajorian
looked at the three older men and
laughed.
"What, you didn't think I saw things
like that?" Gerron
chuckled.
"Umm no it's not that. I know you
are very observant, I just
didn't realize you were watching
Ken." Greg recovered first.
"I wasn't watching him really but
it was hard to miss, when I
first noticed it I started paying
closer attention." Gerron state
plainly.
"I am surprised that Ken would admit
to something like that
if he felt it was hopeless." Chakotay
said.
"No he doesn't think it is hopeless.
He admitted it because
he wanted us to talk him out of
thinking it was." There was no doubt
in Gerron's mind he was right and
you could hear it in his voice.
"When did you get to be so smart?"
Greg hugged him and kissed
his cheek.
"When I fell in love with you." He
answered with a kiss of
his own and a smile.
"Good answer." Greg shifted a bit
Gerron never failed to get
him aroused with the simplest of
touches. Deciding that they needed
to take the matter home, he patted
Gerron's leg, his sign to
say 'it's time to go'. Gerron understood
and got up.
"Well it's time for us to go. I am
sure you two have better
things to do than sit around and
entertain us all night." Greg stood
took Gerron's hand and walked to
the door.
"Thanks for the help and the show
of support Greg and Gerron,
you don't know how much it means
to me." Tom stood and shook both of
their hands.
"The pleasure was ours Tom you are
a good man." Greg shook
his hand then gave him a friendly
slap on the back.
"Thank you Greg for everything."
Chakotay hugged his old
friend.
"Hey anytime Chak. You be good to
him or I will kick your
ass." Greg joked as he hugged him
back.
"I will I promise." Chakotay smiled
and stepped away.
"Good Night Gerron, don't keep him
up too late, he's an old
man." Chakotay winked at the younger
man and Gerron blushed.
"Chief! Don't embarrass Gerron like
that!" Tom blushed along
with Gerron.
"Oh he knows I am teasing him." Chakotay
laughed wrapping his
arms around Tom.
Good Night guys, see you soon." Greg
said as he walked out
the door.
Once they were alone Chakotay
kissed Tom and hugged him tighter. Tom
responded by deepening the kiss
slipping his tongue over Chakotay's
lips, he moaned and allowed it entrance.
They stood in the middle of
the living room holding on to one
another and just allowed the
passion they felt for each other
be told through that kiss. Finally
the need for air became too great
to ignore, they ended the kiss
together as if in silent agreement.
"Tom I think it's time to go to bed."
Chakotay panted as he
looked at Tom, seeing the blue eyes
bright with arousal. Tom couldn't
speak he was so overwhelmed by the
feelings that kiss had produced he
just nodded his agreement. They
made their way to the bedroom slowly
not letting go of each other, kissing
and removing clothes that
suddenly seemed to be in the way.
Once they reached the bedroom
Chakotay turned so his back was
to the bed, he pulled Tom with has he
fell onto it.
Tom took at advantage of his position
he sat up and straddled
Chakotay. He ran his hands over
the smooth chest slowly, enjoying the
feel of his skin. He kept his touch
light memorizing each inch, as
his fingers skimmed across one of
the taunt nipples Chakotay let out
a moan. Tom decided to see if he
could increase the volume of the
moan so he lowered his head and
licked the nipple and surrounding
area when he did he was rewarded
with strangled cry of pleasure. He
moved to the other nipple and repeated
his actions, Chakotay's
moaning seemed to be louder now.
Tom made his way down his chest,
placing butterfly kisses randomly
as he went. When he reached
Chakotay's belly button he darted
his tongue out and into the
sensitive area. He was nearly bucked
off for that little taste. Again
his mouth was on the move, kissing
and licking Chakotay's skin. Tom
by passed his erection for a minute
and gave a long slow lick to his
balls causing Chakotay to gasp.
He chuckled a bit and then licked his
way up the shaft ending his travels
by dipping his tongue into the
small opening at the tip to retrieve
some of the salty liquid leaking
out. That caused Chakotay to whimper
then scream as Tom took the head
into his mouth and sucked on it.
"Yes! Tom that feels so good." His
hands were in Tom's hair
now, not holding him there just
holding on.
Encouraged,
Tom took more in sucking and swirling his tongue
over the head as he did. Tom's hands
were not idle either, one
sliding over Chakotay's skin lightly
causing him to shiver while the
other went between his legs, parting
them so he could take hold of
the sac and gently kneaded his balls
around. Chakotay's hips bucked
trying to push himself deeper into
Tom's mouth. Tom pulled back and
let the throbbing member slip from
his mouth. Chakotay groaned at the
loss of the hot wet mouth around
him.
"Tom please!" Chakotay begged the
need for release so great
he couldn't bare it.
"Chak?" Tom knew what he wanted but
he was afraid to ask, he
had never entered a man before,
what if he hurt him.
"Please Tom I want you inside me."
Chakotay answered the
unasked question.
"I have never." He was visibly nervous.
"It's okay, just do what feels right
Tom." He pulled the
younger man on top of him and kissed
him. "I trust you." He
whispered.
The rest
of the evening Chakotay showed him just how much he
trusted him and Tom found that he
could make Chakotay feel as
gracious as he had made Tom feel.
@@@@@@@@@
Next day Tom returned to duty, Chakotay
was no longer
considered "recovering" he had been
moved to "convalescing". The
doctor said he didn't need to have
someone with him all the time,
although he might feel uncomfortable
with it. He mentioned that to
the captain.
If Tom was apprehensive about leaving
Chakotay it was nothing
compared to what Chakotay was feeling.
Kathryn had sensed that
apprehension and asked Tuvok to
work Beta shift, suggesting that he
spend the free time working with
Chakotay on the end of the security
simulations he and Tom had developed
over the past six weeks.
Chakotay appreciated the company.
He and Tuvok had become
good friends during his medical
leave. Tuvok showed up just as Tom
was leaving for duty. The
two men shared morning greetings, Tom
kissed Chakotay good-bye promising
he would be home for lunch and
left. Tuvok watched the exchange,
quite pleased that the two men had
decided they were well suited for
each other.
"Come in Tuvok, how are you this
morning?" Chakotay offered a
chair.
"I am well thank you. How are you
Chakotay?" Tuvok responded
as he sat.
"I feel a lot better thanks. What
brings you here this
morning?"
"The Captain thought you and I could
spend the morning
finishing up the security hologram
program."
"That is a good idea, I will also
have to remember to thank
her for being so tactful in saying
I might feel uncomfortable being
alone today." Chakotay smiled and
Tuvok acknowledged his assessment
of the suggestion.
"She is worried about you, as is
the rest of the crew."
"I know, I have a feeling it will
be a long time before she
doesn't worry about me. It's good
to have friends like Kathryn and
you. Thank you again for everything
you did for me in the past six
weeks Tuvok."
"You are quite welcome Chakotay.
Now why don't we get
started, I am sure you would like
to be done by the time Tom comes
back." Without actually saying it
Tuvok gave Chakotay his approval of
the changed status of the two men.
Chakotay nodded and they went to
work.
@@@@
Down the hall Harry was in his quarters
getting ready for his
shift. He felt quite pleased with
himself. He had come to a decision
earlier that morning. He knew that
he had to make up with Paris but
in his own way. He had a plan and
he would do everything in his power
to implement that plan as soon as
possible. He wasn't going to just
run to Tom and say he was sorry,
Tom would be suspicious of that.
Besides he wasn't sorry, he had
nothing to be sorry for. He would
just let Tom think he was sorry,
let him get comfortable enough to be
willing to hang out with Harry without
the jerks around. Then he
would be able to do what he knew
he had to do.
"Let's just hope the captain goes
for it." He said to
himself. He was sure she would,
everyone could use a break right
about now. All he had to do was
find a planet that was inviting
enough for shore leave. Confidence
emulated from him as he left his
quarters. It was a good day, the
first day of his proving to Tom
Paris that he did need him as a
friend.
#####
On the bridge things were tense for
awhile, Harry ignored
Tom, not wanting to raise any eyebrows
he couldn't just suddenly be
okay with Tom. Tom tried his best
to just brush the uneasy feeling he
had aside. B'Elanna was at the engineering
station watching Harry,
Greg was at Tactical keeping an
eye on Tom. No one said much of
anything for about two hours, when
Harry spoke.
"Captain, I have found an M-class
plant, senses are showing
that it is uninhabited and it's
rich with dilithium deposit."
"Very good Ensign. How far are we
from it?"
"Five light years ma'am"
"Wonderful, send Lieutenant Paris
the coordinates, Tom lay in
a course."
"Aye, Captain." Both men responded.
The rest of the
morning went somewhat better, everyone was busy
getting information and arranging
for people to be a part the away
team. Kathryn escaped to her ready
room, she had some things to think
about. Namely if this planet they
were heading for was uninhabited
and safe, shore leave could be an
option. She commed Tuvok who was
still with Chakotay and the three
of them discussed the
possibilities. All agreed that if
circumstances allowed they should
not pass up the opportunity that
had presented itself to them.
After lunch the
senior staff gathered in the ready room to hear
the outlined course of action they
would take. Having received
confirmation that the planet was
in fact uninhabited and there were
no alien cultures near by that might
have a claim on it. It was
decided that there would be four
away teams assigned to collect
dilithium and search for food sources.
Once that was completed shore
leave would begin. Each member of
the crew would be entitled to two
days. While they were at it they
would use the down time to do any
repairs and maintenance that may
be required.
Harry sat
back and listened to the plan quite pleased with
himself. Step one was done, on to
step two. He would make sure he was
part of one of the away teams so
he could survey planet. He would
need to know as much as he could
about the planet that could only be
learned on the surface. Once that
was done he could move to step
three.
After
shift in his quarters he went over his plan again very
carefully. He had to be sure that
Tom would be respective to the idea
of the two of them being alone together
for a few hours. Harry was
confident he would succeed in that,
he knew exactly how to get to
him. Tonight he would begin that
part of the plan, he called for a
location check and from that Tom
was in his quarters. Once decided
Harry changed and went to pay Tom
a visit, only there was no answer
at Tom's door.
Asking the computer
again for a location check and again being
told that he was in his quarters,
Harry let himself in Tom's cabin.
When the door slid open Harry stepped
in and was immediately stunned
to see that the cabin was empty.
Nothing of Tom's was there, the
place had been cleaned thoroughly.
Confused, Harry asked for the
exact location of Lieutenant Paris,
when the computer gave the answer
Harry was livid.
Why in hell was
Paris still in the commander's quarters? Why was
the computer now stating that those
quarters were Tom's also? Harry
knew that the commander had been
taken off the recovery list that he
would be returning to work before
they left orbit. Paris didn't need
to be playing nursemaid anymore,
he stomped off swearing under his
breath convinced more than ever
that Paris needed to be taken in hand.
&&&&&
Personal Log: Ensign Harry Kim
"Well that's it, Paris has just proven
to me beyond a shadow
of a doubt that it is time to take
him to task. Still playing
nursemaid to the almighty Commander
Chakotay, what in hell was wrong
with him? Is he waiting until the
commander booted him before he
leaves? Stupid bastard! Well once
we get down on the planet and I
show him that I am the only one
he needs he will be grateful I spared
him that bullshit. Now I just have
to make sure that our shore leave
is scheduled at the same time, preferable
among the last of the crew
to be given shore leave.
The captain won't waste much time
looking for us once shore
leave is over. I know just how to
make it look like we
both "disappeared" without a trace.
Convincing Paris that Voyager
left without us might present a
problem but not much I am sure. I
have already replicated the necessary
items to make sure he isn't too
confrontational. He will thank me
once he realizes that we are
supposed to be best friends forever
and there is no one around to
fill his head with the stupid notion
that he doesn't need me.
Not returning to the Alpha Quadrant
is something he would
prefer anyway. There isn't anything
for him there, just a prison
sentence to finish out and a father
who will manipulate him for the
rest of his life. It's best that
we stay here for good. End log."
Feeling somewhat better Harry settled
in for the night. He would talk
to Tom in the morning about patching
things up between them.
In another cabin
the computer beeped, alerting the occupant that
there had been an unacceptable log
entry made. Going over to the
computer to retrieve the source,
and the extent of the log, once
read, the person frowned. This is
not good and it will not due.
Storing the log in a secure file,
the computer was switched off and
the thoughts ran wild, this must
be prevented.
@@@@@@@@
Tom and Chakotay were sitting on
the couch talking quietly
when the door chime rang.
"Enter" Chakotay called out. When
the door opened it revealed
Tuvok on the other side.
"Good Evening gentlemen, I was wondering
if we could discuss
your shore leave?"
"Sure Tuvok come in and have a seat.
Can I get you anything."
Tom was the one who answered.
"Thank you, but no I am fine. Chakotay
because of your recent
health problems the captain and
I thought that it would be best for
you to take shore leave first. Knowing
that Tom would of course want
to join you the captain has scheduled
helm maintenance for the latter
part of our stay. I know that is
it presumptuous on our part to make
these decisions for you both, but
be reassured that we have both of
your best interests in mind."
"Tuvok, I think that would be a great
idea and I don't think
you and Kathryn are being presumptuous.
I know Tom could use the
downtime especially after having
taken care of me all this time.
Thank you." Chakotay was touched
by the concern both Kathryn and
Tuvok continually showed him.
"Yeah, thanks Tuvok and thank the
captain for me too. It may
seem like I have been on vacation
all this time but it has not been a
picnic in my book. Chief here can
be one hell of a tough patient."
Tom laughed as he ducked away from
Chakotay who tried to slap his arm.
"Very well gentlemen, I will not
take up anymore of your time
this evening. Plan on taking your
shore leave in three days. Good
Night." Tuvok left after the two
men said their good nights.
"Wow chief shore leave and together.
What are we going to do
while we are down there?" Tom snuggled
back into Chakotay's arms.
"Oh, I am sure we can think of a
few things." He smiled and
kissed Tom's cheek.
"I wonder if we can do some hiking.
I could use a good leg
stretch."
"I can think of another way to stretch
those legs Slim, and
it will be less wear and tear on
me." He kissed Tom again.
"And I know for a fact that you will
be exhausted when we are done."
Leaning in further he took Tom's
mouth with his own and kissed him
with everything he had. Just to
make sure Tom had no doubt as to what
he wanted to do once they beamed
down. Tom responded with a deep moan
and wrapped his arms around Chakotay
neck. They spent the rest of
the evening going over Chakotay's
plan, just to make sure they were
both in agreement.
####
Harry tried for three days to get
Tom to talk to him, of
course he wouldn't come right out
and say anything. Tom needed to be
the one to approach him. But he
was sure Tom saw that he was willing
to talk. Well just two more days
and they could go on shore leave
together. Harry would figure out
a way to do it.
He was feeling rather cheery
this morning as he walked into the mess
hall. His first sight was Tom and
the commander sitting at a table in
the back talking. His mood slipped
slightly, but not enough to cause
him any worry. He got his breakfast
and picked a table close enough
to watch the two men but not so
they would notice. Suddenly his mood
went black.
"So Chief, you ready to get out of
here and start our shore
leave?" Tom seemed way too excited
about this for Harry's liking.
"Of course I am Tom, getting off
this ship even for 24 hours
would be great." Chakotay was smiling
way too much at Tom. Harry was
getting pissed.
Harry didn't notice the other person
watching him watch them. He was
too wrapped up in what was going
on at the other table.
"I am really excited about this,
I mean going down to a
planet and not have to worry about
any aliens trying to kill us or
charge us with crimes we didn't
commit." Tom laughed remembering far
too many times things like that
happened in the past.
"Tom, now just because there aren't
any aliens doesn't mean
there can't be trouble." Kathryn
stepped up to the table smiling.
"Oh captain I promise I won't cause
any trouble." He smiled
back with his best look of innocence.
Chakotay and Kathryn laughed,
Harry had seen enough he decided
he wasn't going to wait. Things had
gotten out of hand, finishing his
meal trying to hide his disgust he
got up and disposed of his tray.
Not noticing he was being watched he
stormed out of the mess hall.
Tom had noticed Harry's abrupt departure
and frowned.
Chakotay also noticed, he took Tom's
hand and gave it a loving
squeeze. Turning back to his lover
Tom smiled and shrugged his
shoulders as if to say, not my problem.
"Well gentlemen, I just wanted to
say I hope you enjoy your
shore leave. There is something
I must attend to." Kathryn got up
from her place.
"Thanks Kathryn see you in two days."
Chakotay smiled and
nodded to her.
"See ya later Captain." Tom didn't
sound as happy has he had
just a few minutes before.
"Everything will be fine Tom, I promise."
She whispered to
him as she bent and gave him a peck
on the cheek. Kathryn then walked
away.
"Come Tom let's go and finish getting
ready." Chakotay stood
still holding Tom's hand. Tom followed
suit and they left.
@@@@@
Back in Harry's cabin he was throwing
things in a carryall
while he cursed under his breath.
The commander was not going to win,
Tom would spend his shore leave
and the rest of his life with Harry.
Harry knew that he was condemning
himself to a life without love and
children, but he would have his
best friend back and that was what
was important.
Once he had everything he needed
he checked the computer for
the time that Tom and the commander
had decided to leave. He had to
be on the surface before them. He
had to leave quickly, he had
discovered they were scheduled to
leave in an hour. Double checking
his bag and satisfied he had everything
he needed he headed for the
door when the door chime rang.
"Enter." Harry couldn't keep the
annoyed tone out of his
voice he didn't have time for whoever
was there. The door swished
open and Ken Dalby was standing
there.
"What do you want Dalby? I am in
a rush!"
"Hello to you too, Ensign, I was
wondering if you had a
minute." Ken was nervous he wasn't
sure why he had been approached,
but he had his orders, get Harry
Kim to deck 4 Observation Lounge as
soon as possible.
"No I don't I am late. Get out of
my way." Harry tried to
push passed him.
"Hey give me a break, I just have
a message for you okay?"
Ken was pissed he hated being pushed
around. Suddenly glad he decided
to lose the idea of pursuing this
jerk he was just going to do the
job he was sent to do.
"Whoever you have a message from
I am sure I don't want it.
Now get the hell out of my way!"
Harry now too pissed to care he
could be provoking the man standing
in front of him.
"So even if it's from Tom you don't
want to hear it?" Ken
spat out and Harry quickly stopped.
"Why would Paris ask you to give
me a message?" Harry was a
bit curious, maybe he had read the
situation wrong earlier.
"The hell if I know, he just asked
me to come and ask you to
meet him in the Observation Lounge
on deck 4 in five minutes."
Message delivered he thought, he
didn't really believe the message
was from Tom. He couldn't put his
finger on what bothered him about
it, but than again he didn't care.
"Fine thank you. Now get out."
"You know Kim if I didn't like Tom
so much I wouldn't have
delivered the message and I would
make damn sure you wouldn't show."
Ken turned on his heels and left.
Ken gone Harry let out the breath
that he had been holding,
Tom wants to talk to me, good maybe
he is ready to admit he needed
me. Once again he mood changed,
he was happy again. Putting his
carryall down, he figured Tom didn't
need to know what he had been
planning just yet. Hell at this
point maybe Tom would be willing to
go along with it. Feeling better
then he had in quite some time he
left his cabin and made his way
to the observation lounge.
When he got there it was dark he
didn't turn the lights on
maybe Tom didn't want anyone to
see them talking. Could be a problem
Harry didn't want anymore problems.
He moved into the lounge and
looked out the viewport momentarily
thinking about just how great
things were going to be real soon.
He didn't see the person hiding in
the shadows and he never saw the
blunt end of the bat'leth coming
down to strike him in the back of
the head. He felt the pain and then
everything went black.
####
Tom and Chakotay arrived in the transporter
room, both
noticeably excited and anxious.
Chakotay gave the ensign on duty the
coordinates for their desired destination
and then stepped up on the
pad next to Tom. Nodding their readiness
the ensign initiated the
transporter and they shimmered out
of sight. The door of the
transporter room slid open and the
captain dismissed the ensign on
duty, giving him a fifteen-minute
break. As soon as he was gone she
commed Tuvok and initiated the transporter.
A few minutes later Tuvok
entered the room and gave her the
answer she needed without saying a
word. Kathryn breathed a shy of
relief.
"I will meet you in my ready room
in ten minutes Tuvok." She
told him with little emotion.
"Aye, Captain."
When Kathryn reached the sanctity
of her ready room she activated her
personal log.
"Personal Log Kathryn Janeway. Security
code Alpha Zero Four."
Taking a deep breath she began.
"Today I made the hardest decision
in my life, to put the life of one
person ahead of all others. I could
not allow Harry Kim to go through
with his plan to kidnap Tom Paris.
I had to do something and quickly,
I thought I had two days to try
and work something out but Mr. Kim
forced my hand this morning. I am
deeply distressed that I felt I had
to go as far as I did, but I could
not and would not allow Harry to
destroy all the lives his selfish
act would have destroyed." The door
chime interrupted her. "Computer
pause recording."
"Enter." Tuvok entered and she motioned
for him to sit.
"Tuvok, have you handled the rest
of the problem?"
"Yes captain."
"Very well then, it's done. We will
inform the crew of the
terrible accident at 1200 hours."
Her voiced faulted a bit, a wave of
guilt washed over her. Tuvok saw
the emotion come over her.
"Captain, you did the only thing
you could. Lieutenant Paris
and Commander Chakotay are far too
important to this crew for you to
have stood by and done nothing."
Tuvok knew Kathryn needed to be
reassured that it was for the best,
to hoping lessen her guilt.
"Keep telling me that Tuvok and one
day I might believe you."
She knew by deciding to take matters
into her own hands she had added
more of a burden to her already
heavy load. But at the same time she
knew that there was no choice in
the matter. Harry Kim had to be gone
he was too much of a threat to the
entire crew. She believed that
even if she could have stopped him
this time he would find a way to
leave with Tom.
"Captain, logically ending Mr. Kim's
life was for the best.
He was a menace to himself and the
rest of the crew. By removing him
from the ship you have ended the
possible threat of him stealing a
shuttle at some point and forcing
Mr. Paris to go with him. Which
would cause Commander Chakotay to
follow and then we would have to
follow."
"I get the point Tuvok. Thank you
for your help. Of course
this matter will never be discussed
again. As far as anyone will ever
know Harry Kim died in a terrible
transporter accident on his way to
the planet for his shore leave."
She hoped that if she repeated that
lie to herself enough she would
able to convince everyone herself
included that it was the truth.
"Understood Captain." Tuvok stood
and went to the door.
"Thank you again Tuvok. Dismissed.
See you at 1200 hours."
"Aye Captain." Tuvok left the ready
room.
Kathryn sat back down on her couch
and reopened her personal log.
Though she was sure she shouldn't,
she detailed the entire turn of
events, she would delete everything
at a later date. She just wanted
to get it all out so she could put
it to rest. Once done she leaned
back closed her eyes and cried.
@@@@@
At 1200 hours all crewmembers were
called to the holodeck,
even those who had been on the planet.
The captain stepped forward
and called for attention.
"First I want to apologize to the
people who were on leave. I
promise this will be short and if
you choose to you may return to the
planet. If you choose not to, I
will allow you to do so at a later
date." Standing even straighter
she looked around the room, her eyes
fell on Tom, Chakotay behind him
with his arms around Tom's waist.
They looked so happy and content
she knew what she was about to say
would be hardest on Tom but Chakotay
would help him through it.
"Now on to the reason I called you
all here. At 1100 hours
Ensign Harry Kim was killed in a
transporter accident." There was a
short gasp, but somehow Kathryn
knew it was because Harry lost his
life. It being reminded at it could
happen to anyone.
"While being transported to a spot
he had chosen for his
leave, there was a inexplicable
surge in the transporter's matrix.
When we tried to retrieve Ensign
Kim we were unsuccessful. I know he
will be missed." She didn't really
believe that but felt she needed
to say it anyway.
Everyone just stood for a minute
absorbing what she said. A few
people seemed to be sad from the
looks on their faces. Surprisingly
enough Ken Dalby among them finding
Tom again she noticed that his
eyes were watery. Chakotay tightening
his hold on Tom, leaned in and
whispered something in his ear,
Tom shook his head.
"There will be a memorial service
for Ensign Kim tomorrow at
1200 hours in the shuttle bay. That
is all, dismissed." She turned
from the crowd and wiped her eyes,
she hated herself for having to
lie but she had no choice. The crew
slowly dispersed Tom just stood
there for a minute silently saying
good bye to the first friend he
made on his own. Then he turned
into Chakotay's arms and held on
tight.
"You okay Tom?"
"Yeah I am. I'm upset that our last
conversation was an
argument but that is something I
will deal with. I am sad for his
parents and Libby. But me I am fine,
I have my best friend right
here." To bring home the point he
hugged Chakotay tighter.
"Let's go back to our quarters and
just relax if you want to
talk I will listen."
"You don't mind us not going back
to the surface?"
"Not at all Tom, shore leave can
happen another time. Come
on."
They turned to leave and were met
by B'Elanna, Greg and Gerron.
"Tom you okay?" B'Elanna asked as
she hugged him.
"Yeah I'm fine." He answered softly.
"Tom if you need anything just
let us know." Greg put his
hand on Tom's shoulder and gave
it a supportive squeeze
"Thanks Greg."
"Tom and I were just going back to
our quarters you are
welcome to join us." Chakotay offered
as he took Tom's hand and
motioned for them to leave. It was
going to be a long 24 hours
Chakotay knew.
@@@@@
The service was short, most of the
crew was there which was a
surprise to many. After it was all
over Tom suggested that everyone
go to Sandrine's to have one last
drink for Harry. If anyone was
surprised at this suggestion no
one said a word. There was music and
laughter, Tom called it an Irish
wake, send the dead off with a party
not tears. Though it didn't last
long everyone seemed to have a good
time talking about Harry no harsh
words were spoken though. Tom
noticed Ken standing at the bar
by himself, he went over and stood
next to him.
"Hey Ken."
"Hey Tom."
"You doing okay?"
"Yeah fine, how about you?"
"Oh I will be okay. I know I am going
to miss, Harry, but the
old Harry not the one who had been
around lately." Tom gave Ken a
small smile.
"I know what you mean, my last conversation
with him wasn't
the best. I can't believe that other
then you I may have been the
last one to talk to him."
"Yeah well we both said some pretty
harsh things to him in
the corridor that night."
"No I mean yesterday morning." Forgetting
for a minute his
feeling that the message had not
come from Tom.
"Ken I haven't spoken to Harry since
that night I moved into
Chakotay's." Tom was confused.
"Oh right, well than I guess I was
the last one to talk to
him." Ken shrugged it off. Now he
knew for sure he that had been
right, Tom would have never meet
Harry alone anywhere. Who sent the
message? Why would they want him
to use Tom's name to get Harry to
the observation lounge? Doesn't
matter now he thought.
"I am sorry that your last memory
of him wouldn't be a good
one."
"Thanks Tom and the same goes for
you."
"Thanks Ken. I have to go Chakotay
and I are going back down
to the planet for the day. See you
tomorrow." Tom placed his hand on
Ken's shoulder and then turned and
walked over to Chakotay. They left
soon after that and went back to
the planet surface.
"Chief, I need a favor." Tom whispered
as he kissed
Chakotay's neck.
"Anything Tom." Chakotay moaned.
"Remind me that even when things
change but we will be okay."
He put his head on Chakotay's shoulder
and sighed.
"We will be okay Tom." Chakotay lifted
Tom's head from his
shoulder and proceeded to show him
that no matter how much things
changed in their lives they would
always be okay.
The End