Disclaimers: See Part 1
If you haven't read the warnings in Part 1, please do so.
I couldn't believe what they had done. Shetar and Reigh had been
nothing but cruel, demanding and heartless, but this, this was beyond
anything I had ever seen. Watching from the balcony, I saw Reigh lead
Chakotay deep into the markets and abandon him there after making sure
he was completely helpless. I saw the woman press him up against the
wall, and then I watched him slowly slide down it.
"Lady, please don't do this to him." But the cruel smile on her face
told me that she was enjoying this. My heart ached as I imagined what
they were doing to him. By everything holy, he couldn't even protect
"We shall see how proud he is when he gets back."
"You're...you're going to leave him there?"
"It was actually Reigh's idea to make him more tractable, but I agreed."
I remembered the gentle way Chakotay had touched me the night before.
How we had shared and what was being stripped away from him now.
"Lady, please, is there anything I can do to change your mind?"
Reigh came striding back into the room and joined us on the balcony. She
stared down and laughed. I wanted to scream, to leap the 20 feet to the
ground and go get the Com..Chakotay. I was completely unprepared when
she pulled a scarf loose, slid it between my teeth and tied it tightly
behind my head. Then with a sharp slap to my face, she and Shetar
walked out of the room.
"Do not leave my quarters and don't touch that gag," Shetar ordered.
I stared at the door they left open. How cruel could anyone be? He was
fucking helpless down there and they leave me like this. I would rip
their fucking thr.....It was several moments before the device released
me from the punishment.
I knew I couldn't leave the room. I tried that before and Shetar had
found me unconscious on the floor, the door open, my attempted
disobedience obvious. I had to watch him. Don't ask me why. It wasn't
some morbid curiosity, it was a bond. The two of us were stuck down
here. I had to watch. So, I stood on the balcony watching Chakotay
stumble blindly through the market.
I stood there and watched how many women surge and cover his body. Some
of them beat him, others touched him, stroking him, others tripped
him. I saw one climb over him, and the others, gods above, they stood
there and watched like Chakotay was some sort of side show. I couldn't
believe I was seeing this.
I couldn't believe this world. It was insane, absolutely fucking
insane. He was a human being, my mind screamed. More tractable, my
ass. They wanted to break him!
Then the crowd broke up and I saw him clearly. Gods, in only a short
amount of time, he was kneeling close to the wall, covered in welts and
bruises and blood, but what really hurt me was his head was down.
'Lift your head up, Chak. Come on. Lift your fucking head up. You can
do this,' I coached mentally.
As if he heard me, Chakotay's head slowly and carefully came up. He
looked around blindly, listening to the sounds around him. He slowly
and carefully stood up.
'Come on, Big man, walk this way,' I chanted to myself inanely, but I
couldn't leave him there. But my heart screamed as he went too far and
entered another area of the market.
I could see several young girls playing, I assumed Chakotay heard them
when he went to them. I wanted to cry when one of them tripped him and
even I could tell by her imperious stance, she was ordering Chakotay to
kneel. This kid must have been all of ten maybe eleven years old!
Gods above, why couldn't they have done this to me. I could deal with
it. Then I felt tears spill when I watched Chakotay go to one knee for
this...child, only to watch her point him in the wrong direction. I
screamed against the gag.
For the rest of the day, I stood and watched helplessly as he was
Then Shetar came back in. I was nearly wild. Chakotay was headed for
the gates, the columns. People had lost interest in him, and were
basically ignoring him. He was going to die, and they were laughing. No
one was stopping a blind man walking to his death. I looked at Shetar,
her smile was evil, completely totally evil.
"Do you want to save him, Thomas?"
I knelt, put my head down and nodded. She laughed.
Before she finished saying the word, I was headed for the door. I was
ripping the gag out of my mouth. I leaped down the stairs. He was
about 30 feet from the columns. As I spun around the balustrade at the
bottom of the stairs, I realized I didn't have much time. I hit the
doors, and saw him. He was moving faster than I thought he was.
"Chakotay!" I screamed.
He lifted his head and looked around, but stumbled on something. I was
surprised he even heard me above the hubbub of the crowds. He started
to move again and I was having to weave my way through the crowd.
"Stop!" I raced as fast as I could. He was still moving. I tried not
to touch anyone. Just what I needed: get my ass punished while
Chakotay stumbled past the columns.
Finally, in sheer desperation, I threw a flying tackle and took him
"I'm sorry, Chak, so sorry," I whispered, to identify who had just
grabbed him. I sat up and pulled him to me. He had fallen face first.
"Tom?" I heard a note of desperation, relief and fear.
"Yeah, it's me." I released his arms and helped him straighten them
out. You know they had to ache. I rubbed his arms and then released
the manacles. "It's okay. I gotcha, Chak. It's okay." I repeated as
his arms came around him. I held him for a moment, cradling his head to
my chest. Then I took his hand and put it on the column. "You almost
killed yourself, Big Man. Told you, you aren't leaving here without
He felt it, and I saw the realization dawn on his face.
"They were just going to let me...walk through these?"
"Yeah," I panted. We sat there for a few moments until he sat up. I
touched his arms. "Are you okay?"
"Get me the hell out of here."
I slowly stood back up and helped him stand up. "How do the baths
He just nodded, pulling into me tightly. A woman nearby laughed and
made some snide remark, and instinctively I wrapped an arm around
Chakotay. He had jumped at her laugh. I pressed my lips to his
"It's okay, Chak. It's gonna be okay."
We just stood there for a moment, until his breathing calmed. It was
getting so hard to control my temper. Commander Chakotay, one of the
bravest fucking men I knew had his head down and was leaning into me.
"Let's go, Tom," he said, but I knew what he was thinking. 'Why didn't
you let me go, Tom? If this is my life, why didn't you just let me go?'
There was nothing I could say. I reached over and released the leash
hanging from the collar, and threw the hated thing away. That was when
I saw them coming.
"Shetar and Reigh."
I felt him stiffen. Whether it was from fear or anger, I didn't know.
"Come on, Chak," I coached. If he came unglued on them in public, they
would kill him. "You did it for Janeway. Don't fight them. Please,
Chak. Don't leave me here alone."
Still he stayed on his feet.
"Chak, let me give you a quick life lesson from the book of Paris. If
you really believe your crew will come back for you. If you really
believe that, do what they want. When we're free you can come back and
beat the shit out of them. Just consider it a tactical retreat.
"You're right." And I watched a sight that twisted in my guts for a
long, long time. Commander Chakotay went to his knees. Reigh and
Shetar both nodded approvingly. When they were sure all the surrounding
women had seen us kneel to them, Shetar wrinkled her nose.
"He smells like a pigsty. Clean him up."
I almost lost it.
When I got him to the baths, he was being really quiet. Quiet like my
Dad used to get before he beat the crap out of me. Needless to say, as
we both got into the warm water, I was really unsettled.
"You're making me nervous, Com...Chak."
"What do you want, Paris? A song and dance. That had to be the most
humiliating experience of my life."
"More so than when Janeway cut you out of the loop and didn't tell you I
wasn't really a traitor? C'mon, Chak, I made you eat crow over that for
weeks." I was working a lather up in the sponge. I didn't really want
him to remember the incident, but if it would ease the burn of this
escapade, so be it. "The entire 'fleet crew was laughing at you. Now,
the Maquis were threatening to remove certain parts of my body that I'm
pretty fond of with a dull knife and no anesthesia, but come on-wasn't
"Paris, you are the only person who would try to cheer me up by pointing
out I've been embarrassed worse."
"If it works," I said, putting the soapy sponge in his hands, "don't
"Did they hurt you?" he asked, as he began to wash his chest.
"No, they made me watch." I couldn't suppress the angry tone in my
voice. "The entire time you were out there, I was watching from the
balcony. Couldn't say anything, couldn't do anything, but I watched." I
found myself gritting my teeth in anger. The need to choke the living
shit out of something, preferably of the female gender, rose up in me.
Then I saw Chakotay drop his head again.
Considering what he was going through, my priorities changed. I was
more flexible than he was. I could deal with more. Where I would bend
in the face of a hurricane, he would try to stay upright and get snapped
Shetar's words came back to me. 'He's your responsibility, Thomas.'
Hell, he wasn't my responsibility, I was his keeper. She was using me
to keep him from going berserk. Shetar wasn't stupid, she knew what she
was doing. Damn, damn, damn, I hated this fucking world. I looked over
at Chakotay and I realized she wasn't just using me to keep Chakotay
alive. She was using both of us to keep the other alive.
Chakotay shook his head, his jaw jutting out. "I tried, Tom."
My heart twisted and I knew something inside me changed. Like it was
his fault he was blind or that those two made me watch him stumble
around, helpless, embarrassed. Fuck that! This wasn't his fault and I
wasn't going to let him take responsibility for it.
"It wasn't your fault. What? Have you been going behind my back,
asking them to do this to you?" I waited for a response, and when I
didn't get one. "We can't change it, so accept it and move on."
Chakotay sighed and nodded again, but he didn't pick his head up. Okay,
so much for the kind, sympathetic route. I was so glad he couldn't see.
"However, in my presence Commander Chakotay, you sure as hell better
lift your head up high."
Brought his head up all right. I thought he was going to hit me. If
his eyes weren't covered, I knew that man would be glaring at me.
"That's better." Paris cocky tone 101, enough to get one Commander
Chakotay pissed in the span of two heat beats. And it worked, but I
couldn't alienate him completely.
"Chak, this wasn't your fault. They're playing mind games, and one of
those is to get you so embarrassed that you stop fighting. Okay?"
"So, move over to the edge, and I'll get your back."
I lead him over to the edge and had him lean over, and I scrubbed his
back. You know there are just certain things you don't notice on the
bridge of a Star Ship. Like Chakotay would groan like a happy puppy
getting a belly rub when you scrubbed his back really hard. Of course,
I would never share that with the Commander.
"You know something, Tom?"
"What's that?" He reached out and turned me around and took the sponge
from my hands. "Turn about is fair play."
You know, I make sounds like a really happy puppy dog when he used those
thick fingers and rubbed the tension from my back. I started laughing.
"Only you, Paris." He threw the sponge down under me and splashed me in
"Hey!" Without thinking I turned and threw the sponge. Hit him square
in the chest. Left this big old white soapy spot against all that
"People have died for less," he growled. Then he smiled and I thought
my heart would stop. Damn those dimples. I swear they were some sort
of secret weapon. But, he was feeling better. Mission accomplished.
Chakotay dipped under the water and when he came up. It just hit me.
Water nymph came to mind. Shit, the man was so handsome. Get yourself
under control, Paris. The man had just been humiliated, but all that
water sheeting off his body. Oh yeah, it was hot. He ran his hands
through his hair and over his shoulders and chest. Good thing he
couldn't see my reaction to that.
"Are we done?" he asked.
"Uh, yeah," I said, putting the sponge down with a shaky hand, and
wondering why my mouth had suddenly gotten so dry.
We got out and I took him to one of the seats, where we dried ourselves
and I applied the ointment to his back and his knees. He'd torn them up
out there. He dried his hair, and I noticed it was getting longer. So
was mine for that matter.
"By the way, Commander," I said, with as much smart alec as I could.
"Your hair is no longer reg."
His hand went to the back of it. "I'll deal with it as soon as I can
find a barber, sir."
"See that you do." I touched his arm and he stood up, then his hand
touched the back of my neck, and his fingers touched my hair as well.
"Seems the pot is calling the kettle black."
"Rank has its privileges." However, I couldn't suppress the shudder as
his fingers touched the sensitive areas on my neck. His face went
slightly blank, but then it passed. I took his arm, and we reentered
the insanity that was this world.
I got him back up to Shetar's quarters. She wasn't there, luckily. I
got us both settled over in the alcove, and we relaxed, if you could
call it that. We were both leaning against the wall, when I saw Chak
"I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since lunch yesterday."
"Sit tight." I went and got us both a few pieces of fruit. I put one
in his hand. "You're favorite the bright blue ones."
He took a bite, the juice ran down his arm and his chin.
"Geez, just get you all cleaned up and you make another mess. You are
worse than a kid, Chakotay."
"Don't push me too far, Tom. It's hard enough being blind."
I looked at him and realized he must be exhausted. His head was back
against the wall. He finished the piece of fruit. I got a bowl and he
rinsed his hands and forearms. That was when I saw the bruises and
abrasions where he had fought with the manacles. I sighed.
"Why didn't you say something. These can get infected. I would have
put..." I thought of something and reached for the collar. Then I
stopped when his head snapped around. I decided warning him before
grabbing him by the throat would be a good idea. "Easy Chakotay, let me
look at this." He had bruised his throat horribly. I mean black and
blue bruises and red lines from the edge of the collar. "Shit," I
whispered as I ran my fingers over his adam's apple and the tendons.
"Tom, stop," he said hoarsely.
"Does this hurt?" I asked.
"No, in fact it feels pretty good. Too good."
I looked down to see he was getting excited. The next thing I knew was
I was rubbing a thumb over his jaw.
"You want me to stop?"
Maybe this was where he and I differed so much. He believed everything
had a purpose. I didn't mind just taking life on the wing. If it felt
good and wasn't going to get me in too much trouble; I would consider
it. He thought things out. He turned his head towards me.
"Do you know what they did to me out there?"
"I have a pretty good idea."
He turned his head away. It was amazing to see his stoic face show so
much expression, but I had heard that about people that had
blindfolded. They didn't tend to watch their expressions as carefully.
My throat tightened as I saw the pain. I wanted to make him feel
better. A pep talk did not seem to fit the situation. So, I turned his
face back to me.
"Don't let them win, Chakotay."
I stroked his jaw again. My fingers slowed down on the sticky juice on
his chin. I leaned in and kissed the area, licking the juice off.
"Tom, what are you doing?"
Then I drew on his lower lip, sucking the juice off. He groaned.
"Do I really have to tell you?"
For several moments, he let me do what I wanted, and I set about
cleaning all the fruit juice off his face. Then his hands, those big
hands came up and stroked my face.
"Why?" He asked quietly.
"Because I want to. Doesn't it feel good to feel something nice?
Chakotay, I want to share something with you. Maybe heal our hearts
just a little if I can. If you don't want to. Say so. I'll stop."
"What about when we get back to Voyager? What about B'Elanna?" That
was enough to get me to take my hands off of him. In fact, that was a
pretty low blow.
"That's a big 'if' at this point in time, Chakotay," I said angrily.
"We're looking at almost a month since she left us here. How long does
it take to overthrow a crazy captain?" His reaction was instantaneous
and almost violent.
"Don't say that! My crew will not leave me here!" I saw the panic and
his hands closed on my arms to the point of bruising.
"Okay, you're right, they won't. Your crew will do everything within
their power to get you back," I said gently.
And strangely enough, I felt that old familiar pain. Yeah, they'd come
to get Chakotay, but what about me. I wasn't even in this conversation.
He pushed me away. I moved to the other side of the alcove. We sat
there quietly for a minute. I felt more alone at that moment than I had
through this entire ordeal. I couldn't help it. One minute, I was
offering him me, and the next, he was shoving me away, telling me *his*
crew would come for *him*. Hell, Paris, do you really matter to anyone?
And that was how Shetar found us. We both cringed as the door opened.
"Get out here, both of you."
I touched Chakotay's arm and helped him stand up. I could feel the
tension. I could feel his fear, his anger. He was going through what I
went through the first two weeks. Up until today, he could fight, now
he knew he was vulnerable. Try prison Chakotay, I thought to myself.
You learn that lesson the first day. I moved the white silk out of the
way and we walked out.
Almost in tandem we knelt and Shetar gloated. She walked around us as
if we were two dogs she was considering buying. I knew she was moving
as quietly as possible. I knew she was trying to get to him. She
reached out and touched Chakotay's shoulders and he jumped.
"Take him to the couch, Thomas and bind him to it."
My stomach fell. I know I went pale. She wanted me to betray him that
way? Chakotay actually jerked when she said that. His head came up and
his breathing got ragged. Both of our hands were in fists. I stumbled
for some sort of stall, something to stop this nightmare. The moment of
silence drew out longer.
Then Chakotay spoke, "Tactical retreat, Lieutenant."
It was an order. There was nothing in those words that meant anything,
but I know he was ordering me to do it. I took a deep breath and
touched his arm. He stood up and followed me. I stood him at the base
"Sit down, Chakotay," I said gently. I kept my hands on him until he
was sitting. I knelt down and reached for the ankle chains, and I felt
his hand on my shoulder. He gave it a small squeeze. She was going to
rape him, and I was helping her. "I'm sorry."
His hand lifted my face, and I saw a small smile. "Not you,
Lieutenant." The same words I had said to him when Shetar forced us to
have sex in the dining hall. I nodded, and with his hand still on my
face, he felt it.
I closed the anklet and then the other. I was so glad he couldn't see
the tears in my eyes. I moved to the top of the couch and had him lean
back. He extended his hands to me and I bound the manacles together. It
was so powerful to do that, but what was more powerful was the way he
was letting me do it.
I squeezed his hand, and he returned the gesture. I wanted him to have
something to hang onto during this. He then moved his bound hands over
his head. I knew how shattering it was. I attached the chain to the
top of the couch and adjusted them to where he couldn't get much
momentum going. It was better to be held tightly through Shetar's
little games. To pull and jerk just caused more damage.
I looked down at the Commander, spread out for a woman's pleasure
against his will. I wanted to die. I stepped in between he and Shetar
and leaned over under the pretense of moving him, but instead I kissed
him gently. He returned the gesture.
"I shouldn't have pushed you away," he said gently.
"It's okay, I understand."
And that was it. Like I said, something in my heart changed. It was
sort of like on Ocampa, when I was holding his arm, trying to pull him
up. For a long time, I asked myself why I did that, but I knew the
answer. Despite what anyone on Voyager would have told you. I am not
some heartless bastard that only looks out for number one. Sure, there
are times I am a sorry SOB, but I do care about people.
And despite all the women and men I had been with, despite the
protective armor I had built around my heart, and despite our present
situation, I was beginning to seriously care about Chakotay. And as far
as I was concerned, I had twenty-nine days to show him.
Then she started. I retreated to the alcove and tried not to listen to
the sounds I heard. The way she talked to him, like he was some piece
of meat, like he was some stud for hire. She said the same things to
me, but they were worse for Chakotay, more base. I tried not to hear
him pull and twist against the chains, crying out at the torment she was
putting him through, just like I had. I tried not to hear him beg, just
like I had. I tried not to hear him scream when his anger overwhelmed
him and he couldn't control his thoughts anymore. It was worse to have
to watch it then go through. I curled up in a little ball, trying to
block it out.
"You're going to kill him," I found myself whispering. "Stop, please
Then it was quiet. I looked around. Shetar had left. I moved out of
the alcove. I quickly ran to him.
"Chak? Chak, can you hear me?" I touched his neck, his pulse was
strong. He wasn't being punished, he was unconscious. "Chakotay!" I
gently slapped his cheek. Nothing.
I went and got the basin and washed him down. I was starting to release
him from the chains, but I heard a voice ask.
"What do you think you're doing?"
Reigh! "I was releasing him, Lady. I assumed you were done with him."
"Shetar perhaps, but not me." She came into the room as the sun began
to sink. "Kneel there." She indicated a place not far from the couch.
What was going on? What was Reigh doing here? I knew she was second in
command, but why were they doing this? What did they want from him?
I knelt and this time I was forced to watch as Reigh also used him. This
was obscene. Somehow these women had convinced themselves that we
actually were just animals for their convenience. Every fiber of my
Chakotay woke up moments after Reigh started. I wished there were
something I could say to ease the mortification I saw, as he realized
what was going on. This was debasing. It wasn't even him, Chakotay,
the man, that they wanted. They didn't care about him, one way or
another. All he was to them was an animal to be broken to their wills
and that's what they had set out to do. I watched Chakotay bite his
lip, and start to breath hard. I knew what he was going through. To
have your private life ripped out into broad daylight, to be used this
way would destroy you. It had hurt me badly, but Chakotay...Spirits, if
you really exist, help him.
"You are a big man, Slave. Your cock is perhaps the most pleasing
aspect of your body," she said cruelly, raking her nails down his
chest. Then she slapped him. "Answer me, slave."
"Yes, Lady," he grit out.
Damn you, Reigh. I focused my attention on the floor, anything but
having to watch them. I heard Chakotay scream, and watched his body
arch off the couch in the throes of an uncontrollable orgasm. I tried
not to let my hoarse breathing be too loud. Finally, she finished with
him and climbed off.
"Now you can release him."
I moved forward quickly, and began to release him from the couch. Reigh
paused by the door, I was releasing Chakotay's manacles.
"By the way, it was decided that since we'll kill all the male children,
both Shetar and I would carry a child."
Oh my god, I thought, they were. They were really doing this for the
sole purpose of.... Then Chakotay got my attention. His breathing got
hoarse, his hands became fists and he went as pale as a ghost. I
thought he was going to die. I really thought he was going to have
cardiac on the spot.
"You are a breeding horse, Chakotay. You will be bred over and over and
over. Your male children will be murdered, and your daughters will rule
this city. They will treat men like you, just like I treated you."
I closed my eyes, as Chakotay jerked in the grip of a full punishment. I
kept him from falling off the couch, but that was all I could do. I
should have let him walk past the columns.