SYNOPSIS: AU. Alternate ending to
*Real Life*, Tom fails to get
out of the astro-eddy and disappear
in front of the bridge crew
Brass'ka
By Synbou and Leone
synbou@hotmail.com
leone@gondor.adsl.dk
***
3 years earlier...
*I have given this some careful thought,
Captain, and the only
way that I can get out of here is
the same way that I got in,*
Tom concluded.
*Through one of the astro-eddies?
If I had a better idea I
suggest it, but I don't. It's your
call, Tom,* Janeway told him.
*It doesn't like seems that I have much choice,* Tom said.
*Another eddy is forming,* Harry informed them.
*Captain! I suggest that you take
Voyager away from here. This
one seems to be whopper, the biggest
eddy we've seen so far,*
*We are not leaving, Tom,* she said.
*We have to stay close if we
stand a chance of beaming you out
of there.*
*Captain,* came Tuvok's voice from
behind her. *The eddy is
starting to dissipate.*
*Tom, how long before you clear the
eddy?* she asked with a
strained voice.
*It'd better be soon!* he replied.
*The hull is starting to
buckle,* he told her. *... Captain!
I'm being pulled back in.*
*Report!* Janeway demanded.
*The eddy, it's gone ... and so is
the shuttle,* Harry said with
shock.
***
Now...
Ensign Kim's personal log
They say that it gets easier after
awhile. Adapting to the loss
of someone you cared about, I mean.
I must be different because
it has been three years since Tom's
disappearance and I certainly
did not got used to not having him
around anymore. True, I never
got used to not having my parents
and Libby in my life anymore
either. However, it did get better
once I received news from
them from the Hirogen communication
array. At least, I know that
my parents are well, and that Libby
moved on with her life and is
happy. It surely helped me moved
on with my life. Now, that is a
funny concept...
Losing Tom was a different matter.
When the Caretaker's array
propelled us into the Delta Quadrant,
*we* were ripped away from
our families. When the astro-eddy
closed onto Tom's shuttle,
tearing it apart, Tom was taken
away from *us*. Suddenly, I had a
taste of what my folks back home
most have been through. Then
again, they had not been there to
see us being helplessly ripped
away as we saw Tom disappear into
that spacial typhoon, leaving
only debris behind.
Tom had also received news from home.
And not from just anybody
I might add, from his father.
Captain Janeway had allowed me to
read the letter, hoping that I could
find some closure in the
Admiral's words. The letter's
format had been a little too
formal at first, but it had turned
out to be a very warm and
compassionate one. It was meant
as truce during which the Admiral
was admitting that turning his back
on his beloved and only son
was the worst mistake of his life.
The news of Tom being still
alive, after all these years of
thinking that he was dead, was
like an answered prayer for a second
chance. The Admiral hoped
his letter would have been seen
as the first step of many in the
reconciliation process. God knew
that both of them had a long
way to go, but Owen Paris intended
to hold on to his second
chance as firmly as he could.
But Tom, like to many others, was
gone. There would not be any
second chances. It broke our hearts
as we knew how much Tom would
have liked to make amends with his
father, even if it would have
scared the hell out of him -- not
a fact that Tom would have
readily let known. Still...
The letter from the Admiral had affected
the Captain the most. As
she had taken onto herself
to redeem the rebellious Thomas
Eugene Paris, a friendship had grew
between her and Voyager's
Chief Pilot. It had been the same
special kind of affection,
always kept at a respectful distance,
that had developed between
her mentor and herself. She had
sincerely hoped that she would of
have a chance to reunite the father
and the son together.
Now, as I think back to our fortunate
encounter with the T'Ejil
freighter early today, I'm starting
to believe that there is such
a thing as answers to hopes and
prayers.
On the screen of my monitor, there
is a picture of my best friend
taken on that very same freighter
only a month ago. His
appearance changed a bit, but his
blue eyes are still the same.
I haven't felt this happy in a long
time. Tom is alive out
there, and he has been searching
and waiting for us.
***
3 years earlier
The doors leading to Terminal Three
opened and Prefect Em'Aris
walked on the upper level of the
huge cargo bay. From his
particular position, the director
of the International Space
Station Brass'Ka had a good view
of the activities on the lower
deck.
A small vessel had been pulled into
the cargo bay moments ago. In
spite the fact that it was heavily
damaged, the Prefect could
tell with certitude that it was
not a regional design. Sensors
had indicated the faint presence
of life signs on board, he could
only hope that it was not too late
to save the pilot.
As Em'Aris joined the rest of the
personnel gathered around the
craft, he was met by the Chief engineer.
"Noel, what can you tell
me?"
"It's a Federation shuttlecraft from
the Alpha Quadrant," the
male ex-Borg told him, his tone
reflecting his amazement .
"The Alpha Quadrant?" echoed the
Prefect. "It's a long way from
home. Is it secured?"
"It is, Sir. We're about ready to
open the arch," the engineer
confirmed.
"Go ahead," he authorized. "I fear for the pilot's life."
Without wasting any more time, Noel
opened the shuttle's arch.
Preceded by a security officer,
he and a physician entered into
the dark smoky shuttle. Long minutes
passed before Em'Aris saw
them exit with the unconscious pilot
laid on a stretcher. He was
dressed into a black and red suit.
He had fair features on which
dark red blood was contrasting.
As the med team quickly rushed
him to the Medical Clinic, Em'Aris
stayed behind with Noel.
"He's human," the man voiced, allowing himself a small smile.
"Is he going to be all right?" Em'Aris inquired.
"I don't know. It doesn't look good.
He has a severe head
trauma." Noel bit his lower lip.
"God, I hope that he'll make it.
I haven't seen one of my own in
such a long time..."
"The doctors will do their best,
Noel. Have faith," the older man
said confidently, patting his friend
on the shoulder. He looked
back at the craft. "Will the shuttle
be salvageable?"
Noel sighed heavily. "There's nothing
left intact. It's a miracle
the core and hull didn't breach
before he got out of that eddy.
I'll have to see what I can download
from the computer. With a
little luck, we'll learn who this
guy is and where he is from."
"The way he flew through that eddy
was impressive," Em'Aris told
the engineer. "He seems to be quite
a pilot."
****
Now
Captain's personal Log supplemental.
We'll be in range of the Van'ski
asteroid belt in a few hours. On
the other side, we should find the
space station Brass'ka and
with it a long lost friend. Against
all odds, Thomas Eugene Paris
survived the spacial eddy that had
took him away from us three
years ago. He has been patiently
waiting for us to catch up with
him at this space station ever since.
Rumor has it that he made a
good life for himself as Brass'ka's
Chief Flight Officer, no
less. I am not surprised. Tom proven
himself to be a resourceful
and a dedicated officer. Maybe,
most of all, a loyal and caring
friend.
Losing Tom Paris had a huge impact
on this crew. I wonder if Tom
knew just how appreciated he had
become over the years. By being
given a little trust and support,
the brash young man that had
boarded this ship had revealed himself
be the anti-thesis of what
we had thought him to be. The mercenary
turned out to dedicated
Starfleet officer. The traitor was
in reality a loyal friend
whose sarcastic nature had been
hiding a keen sense of humor.
With Tom's disappearance, we also
had lost a ray of sunshine
which had kept reminding us that
whatever happened, whatever you
did, there was always a bright side
to everything. Had Tom not
have this innate ability to bring
the worse situations to its
simplest components, to transform
dramas into jokes to relieve
tension, I doubt that he would have
been the survivor that he is.
This attitude of his had worked
for him and many of his
antagonists had to admit that it
had worked for them too. It
surely had done so for me.
I haven't felt so much anticipation
and enthusiasm in a long
time. I want to have my ray of sunshine
back.
***
3 years earlier
After 8.3 hours of patient waiting,
Noel was finally rewarded by
a set of confused blue eyes opening
on him. Following the
Starfleet's officer arrival, the
engineer had been able to
download what was left of the shuttlecraft's
memory core. It had
not told him much, but at least
he had a name.
"Tom," he called softly. "Don't be afraid. You're safe."
Tom's eyes slowly focused on him.
"My name is Noel. I'm human like
you. If you wonder what this
thing is on my temple," he indicated
with one hand. "It's a Borg
implant. I was Borg. Oh, but
don't worry the Borg are not here.
We are on the space station Brass'ka.
You got injured in a
shuttlecraft accident. I don't know
how you did it, but you
managed to fly through a spacial
eddy."
"Noel," came Doctor Lalika's voice.
"You're bombarding this poor
man with information. Give him some
time to get his bearings
back."
"Oh, I'm sorry," Noel told the tall woman a bit embarrassed.
"Greeting Tom," the doctor said.
"I'm Lalika, the director of
this medical center." As she looked
over her patient's vital
signs, she went on: "You have
to excuse Noel, he has been
waiting for you to awake for a very
long time." She looked down
at him and brushed his pale cheek.
"You sustained quite sever
injuries to your head, spinal cord,
and abdominal cavity. Most
of it has already been treated.
However, it will take more time
for you're spine to heal. So, don't
be alarmed if you can't feel
parts of your body right now."
Tom tried to say something, but virtually no sound came out.
"Don't try to speak. You'll be able
to soon when you get some of
your strength back," Lalika told
him.
"Vo...Vo-ya-ger...?" he finally managed to ask.
Lalika looked up at Noel who came back closer.
"Voyager isn't in this system, Tom,"
Noel answered him. "It seems
that you traveled quite a bit through
that spacial eddy. I'm not
sure how far away Voyager is, but
I'm trying to find out, okay?"
Tom responded with a small smile.
"Go back to sleep, now," Doctor Lalika
ordered with a gentle
smile. "We will be there when you
will wake up."
Tom's eyes close and sleep took him away almost immediately.
Doctor Lalika then walked away, ready
to attend to another
patient. Noel followed her with
a perplex expression on his face.
"Why didn't you told him about the spinal clamp?" he asked.
"He is still too weak for that Noel," she explained.
"But you have to tell him soon,"
Noel insisted not for the first
time. "The sooner, the better."
"I am aware of that, Noel. But we
can't do it now. Everything is
going to be fine. Do not worry,"
she assured him.
With that, she moved on to care for someone else.
Noel resigned himself to wait some
more. He knew that the human
body was a complicated piece of
machinery, with its own quirks
and quarks. Sometimes the best remedy
was to let the body heal
itself. If it was what the doctor
ordered, who was he to
contradict her. After all, even
if he possessed much of the
Borg's medical knowledge, he was
still an engineer, not a doctor.
***
Now
Commander Chakotay's personal log:
After Tom disappeared and was presumed
dead three years ago, Kes
asked the senior staff, the Doctor
and Neelix to meet her in
conference room one. She didn't
tell us why, but let us know it
was important.
When everyone was gathered, she told
us that Tom had asked her to
give each one of us a memento, something
to remember him by, if
anything ever happened to him. He
had told her he didn't want to
leave messages, because he thought
they were too impersonal.
I was surprised, and I thought that
the others were too, the
exception being Harry Kim, who knew
Tom better than anyone else
on the ship. It was standard Starfleet
procedure to record an
"After I'm dead" message to those
left behind, but obviously Tom
had once again disregarded SOP.
After Kes had told us why she had
asked us to be present, she
fulfilled Tom's request and gave
us each whatever he had left for
us. Not surprisingly, Kathryn was
the first to get her gift. As
none of the things were wrapped,
we all saw what Tom had left to
the others. Kathryn received a book
of Irish poetry and an Irish
cross. With tears in her eyes, Kathryn
told us that the cross was
to wish the bearer good luck.
Next was, also unsurprisingly, Harry
Kim. For him, Tom had left
his music collection and a framed
2-D picture of Tom with his
family. Kes told him that Tom had
said that if there was anything
else in his quarters Harry wanted
to keep, he could have it.
After Harry Kim came Neelix. Tom
had left him a cookbook with
recipes for all kinds of different
pizzas, something that Neelix
appreciated. He was always pleased
to get new recipes. He loved
to cook and new recipes gave him
something new to experiment
with. He also got Tom's favorite
Hawaiian shirt, the one he had
often worn to the Resort. It was
another thing that Neelix
appreciated. He'd always admired
that shirt for it was colorful,
and it was only fitting that
he would get it. Also, I couldn't
imagine who else would wear it.
Then it was B'Elanna's turn. She
got a small statuette of a cute
little pig, which made us all chuckle.
Everyone on the ship knew
how often B'Elanna had called Tom
a pig. She also received a
ceremonial Klingon dagger, making
us remember how Tom always
tried to make her accept her Klingon
side.
I was next. The first thing Kes handed
me was Tom's favorite pool
cue. It made me smile, remembering
all the times we had played in
Sandrine's. Especially the
first time Kathryn was there and the
little stunt she pulled, making
us believe that she had never
played before, then cleaning the
table. And the time when Neelix
and Tuvok were physically merged
in the transporter, creating
Tuvix, who had whipped our butts
at the pool table. Other times,
it had just been Tom and me playing;
sometimes late at night when
we couldn't sleep.
Then Kes gave me the other thing
Tom had left me, and for a
moment I stared at it blankly, wondering
where he had gotten a
pair of Ferengi ears. Then I remembered
and couldn't help
laughing. It was the incident with
the two Ferengi playing gods
on that planet. Now, why Tom had
kept those ears was beyond me,
but I was glad he had, and also
glad that he wanted me to have
them. It made me remember the fun
we'd had on that away mission.
Oh, it had been serious, especially
when we discovered what was
going on, but it had its share of
funny moments, not something
hat usually happened on away missions.
Tuvok got a Rubik's Cube. It had
six different-colored sides,
each one divided into small squares.
Kes told him that Tom had
done that, and that Tuvok was supposed
to turn the sides so each
one was a solid color. She said
that Tom had told her that the
Rubik's Cubes had been quite popular
in the late twentieth
century.
When we had all admired the cube,
Kes handed Tuvok a padd. We all
wondered what was on it, including
Tuvok. He activated it and
read the beginning out loud, realizing,
I think, that we were as
curious as he was. It said, "Tuvok,
this a collection of jokes. I
hope it will help you to understand
human humor a little better.
Live long and prosper. Tom Paris."
Tuvok didn't say anything when
he finished reading, but I think
he appreciated it.
Then it was the Doctor's turn. Tom
had left him several disks and
some chewing gum. Kes told the doctor
that the disks contained
all of Tom's secret holoprograms.
The Doctor's eyes widened at
this, obviously knowing what kind
of programs they were. Kathryn
asked him about them, but the Doctor
refused to tell us. He said
that they were private programs
that Tom had mentioned but never
shared with anyone; not even Harry.
I thought that it might be some romantic
programs, and obviously
B'Elanna did too because she commented
on it. The Doctor turned
his head and look at her when she
said that. Then he very
seriously told her that there was
not one romantic program among
them. They were some things that
Tom had used for himself, as a
kind of therapy.
After the Doctor had received his
things, there weren't anymore,
which surprised us. Kathryn asked
Kes if Tom hadn't left anything
for her. Kes smiled and told us
that he had, but she hadn't
brought it with her. Then she told
us that she had gotten a silk
blouse, and a table decoration made
of lace.
All of the things Tom had left us
were thoughtful, some of them
even humorous, and they were so...
*Tom*. There was no doubt that
every time we looked at our mementos,
we'd remember the charming
and best damned pilot in the Delta
Quadrant, also known as Thomas
Eugene Paris. We also knew that
we would miss him.
Now, three years later, we discover
that Tom didn't die, but was
rescued and is waiting for us at
a space station called Brass'ka
and I'm not quite sure how I feel
about that. Of course, I'm glad
that he didn't die. Before he disappeared
in the special eddy, we
had become friends and I've missed
him -- we all have. So, yes,
I'm looking forward to see him and
have him returned to Voyager
here he belongs.
But, I'm also mad at him. For three
years we have thought he was
dead and mourned for him. I know
that until we received the news
that Tom was still alive, Harry
Kim still grieved for him. I'm
*so* mad at him for doing this to
us. I know it's unfair of me.
It wasn't Tom's fault, but a part
of me blames him anyway.
So, I'm not sure how I'll react when
I see him. I think that
either I'll grab him in a bear hug,
or else I'll deck him. I just
don't know which.
***
3 years earlier
It had been a week since Tom Paris
had arrived on Brass'ka. He
had passed the first three days
in the Med Center, healing
physically and getting over the
shock that once again ripped away
from his home. Being propelled into
the Delta Quadrant had turned
out to be a blessing for him. He
had been given a second chance.
Away from prison, he could do what
he always wanted to do, fly.
He also had great friends. It had
taken months for many of them
to accept them. Still, they had.
They had become a family. The
best family he could ever have in
his opinion. Now, he was 300
years away from Voyager and her
crew and he missed them.
Faith was strange thing, he thought.
He had never really believed
in it. Hell, he had cursed
it for so many years. It had taken
the life of his friends in an accident
*he* been responsible for.
It had also brought him into the
Delta Quadrant, where he, of all
people, had become Voyager's chief
pilot. There had to be a
reason for his presence of Brass'Ka.
Brass'Ka was a safe harbor in space
as its name roughly
translated to. It was a space station
that had opened its doors
to people of all kinds not even
a year before. It was actually
two distinct stations. Each part
was located on different side of
the Van'ski asteroid belt. They
were meant to provide assistance
to the ships that needed to cross
on either side. It was also a
place where world leaders could
come and talk, traders could do
business, and scientists could collaborate
and exchange ideas.
"It's a federation in the making,"
Tom said, amazed by all of
what Noel was telling him.
"Yes. There are 320 worlds and communities
part of the Axis," his
new friend added. "It's like the
first days of the Federation. Of
course, there are not many humans
or Vulcans around."
"I've been fascinated by Earth space
exploration history from its
beginnings in the 20th century,
for as long as I can remember,"
Tom admitted. "I always wondered
what it felt like."
"Now is your chance," Noel said.
"We could use someone like you.
We are always in need of good pilots
that can guide ships through
the belt. What do you say?"
"Well, it's not like taking off by
myself to reach Voyager would
make sense," Tom replied thoughtfully.
"This place is also on its
course to the Alpha Quadrant."
"They're bound to pass by Brass'Ka
eventually," Noel agreed.
"Maybe you'll be able to help them
once they've arrived into the
Axis' jurisdiction. God knows what
will happen from now until
then."
"I hope so," Tom contemplated for
a moment. Then, he sighed
heavily as the reality of who he
really was drawn on him. "Noel,
I have to tell you something about
me before we even go further."
his new friend returned his serious
expression. "It's about what
I did in the past."
"Can it be worse than being an ex-Borg?"
Noel challenged with a
small smile.
"I don't know. You tell me."
"If it's about Caldik Prime and your
stay in prison, I already
learned that from your file that
I found in the shuttle database.
I'm glad that you mention it though.
The director likes people
that are honest and forthcoming.
Don't worry."
"Thanks, Noel."
Tom had rapidly made a name for himself
as he joined the piloting
team. His excellent piloting skills,
his experience, and his
medical training had been quickly
noticed. He had become the
leader of the rescue squad in less
than three months. His first
project with Noel had been to design
a new type of shuttlecraft
which would made their rescue effort
more efficient in the
asteroid belt. They had called the
end result the Sentry. The
little ambulance had somewhat of
a Federation look of speed and
manoeuverability . It could treat
50 injured passengers and ferry
20 more. It was armed and
shielded with Borg technology. It was
also equipped with transporters,
replicators, and a tractor beam.
By the of the end year, the Sentry
had become a class of its own,
with four new ships constructed.
***
B'Elanna Torres' Personal log
The Pig is alive. I can't wait to
put my hands on him. I'll rip
his heart out. He won't know what
will hit him! This time, he
will stay dead. I'll make sure of
that.
The first time he died, after that
warp 10 experiment, he and I
had only started to be friends.
Sure, I was sad when we thought
he had passed away. Tom was
a good guy, even though Tom never
made things easy to help change
what people thought of him. Yet,
I was only starting to realize just
how wrong I had been about
him.
The second time he died - well he
didn't really, did he? When he
disappeared, things were totally
different. It broke my heart.
Oh, who am I kidding? I was devastated.
See, then we were moving
beyond friendship. We weren't dating
or anything. But God, did I
ever wished we had been. I don't
think his disappearance would
have hurt me more if we had been.
This wonderful man who tried
make me laugh, to give me a social
life, to make me feel
attractive, and most of all to make
me feel better about myself
disappeared right in front of my
eyes one day. There was nothing
I could do help him. He vanished
before I had the chance to tell
him that I loved him.
Yes, I fell in love with the Pig.
Tom was always there for me even
if I was rude and aggressive
towards him. He always respected
me. Sometimes, he did dispute
the cause of my temper tantrums,
but he never questioned my
nature. He welcomed it. He accepted
*me*.
Then he left me.
How dare he?! For weeks I resented
him for disappearing like
that, for leaving me before I could
tell him that I loved him.
For weeks I refused to believed
that he had died. I dreamed every
night that he would come back to
me so that I could tell him how
I felt. I fantasized that he would
swept me off my feet and that
we would make passionate love. I
guess that part of my dream is
coming true: Tom is coming back
to us. However, is it too late
for the love part?
It probably is. I moved on over the
years as he must have. I
wonder if he is still the same.
He changed a lot during his stay
on Voyager. He became less bitter
and a lot more confident with
his relationships with people.
Wonder if he has a girlfriend?
***
TBC
End of Part 1
Synbou and Leone thank you for reading.
Feedback is always
appreciated at synbou@hotmail.com
Our thanks to PJ in NH, Elli and Zappy Zaps for their inputs.
Copyrights @ May 2002