They Don't Know Part Seven
Please see part one for disclaimer, codes, warnings, etc.
Early one morning, six weeks later . Chakotay's POV.
Tom leaned over and gently kissed his beloved awake and whispered, "Morning, sweetheart. Did I tell you that you're glowing this morning?"
I of course took his greeting and compliment the wrong way. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means that I love you. And that you are beautiful." He responded uncertain whether or not he should have said anything at all.
"I am a man still. Even though I am in this body right now." I felt so afraid that Tom just wanted me remain female.
"Cha you are as beautiful a woman as you were handsome as a man." He said carefully.
"Were!" I jumped out of bed and started pacing around the room.
"Were?" Tom looked at me in utter confusion.
I stopped my pacing and turned towards him and gave him my best glare. "You said, and I quote, 'Cha you are as beautiful a woman as you *were* handsome as a man.' end quote." I looked at him triumphantly as he looked like wanted to escape.
"Cha, I love you. You are beautiful, and you are handsome, and you are smart,
and you are and always will be first and only in my heart.
I....love....you...and...only....you....forever." Tom said with hope in his
I heaved a huge sigh. "Oh Tom, I'm sorry. I am just so........I don't know. I love you too."
Tom exhaled loudly and gathered me into his arms. I burrowed in feeling protected, loved. It was such a good feeling, but totally alien. Usually I am the one who protects, not the other way around. The holo doctor warned me that my hormones would take some getting used to. He wasn't kidding. That had to be the reason why I'd been so temperamental these days. I pulled away slightly and looked up into Tom's blue eyes. His eyes held so much love my heart melted, and then he kissed me with such gentleness my toes curled.
"Mmmm.....you have to get ready for duty and I have an appointment in sickbay." I regretfully informed him.
"Yeah you're right. I promised Harry I would meet him at 0730 for breakfast today."
"Go get in the shower then, I am going to replicate myself some breakfast while I wait for you." I had never been much of a breakfast person, but lately, I'd been hungry enough for ten. I ate hungrily. Then placed the dishes in the recycler and got dressed to go see the doctor.
In the messhall.
Tom walked over to the counter grabbed himself some toast and coffee, then walked over to sit with Harry.
"Good morning Har."
"Good morning." Harry replied tiredly.
"What's the matter?"
"B'Elanna kept me up most of last night because she couldn't sleep." Harry replied yawning.
"I hear ya, this morning Chakotay freaked out on me because I complimented him."
Tom's comm badge beeped. "Janeway to Paris."
"I need to see you in my ready room before your shift."
"I'll be right there. Paris out." Tom closed the channel and looked at Harry and said, "I wonder what the Captain wants."
"Only one way to find out. See ya on the bridge Tom."
A few minutes later in the Captain's ready room.
"I want to let you know that Tuvok and I have discussed Ayala's counseling. He has been successfully rehabilitated and I am about to put him back on duty."
"I'm not sure if I like the idea of working with him again."
"I understand your concern, I'll make sure he's not on the same shift as you. But eventually, with a crew this small, your paths may cross."
"I'll deal with it when the time comes." ::And not a moment before.::
"Are you sure you're okay with this Tom? Would you like to speak with Tuvok
"No Captain I'll be fine." ::I hope.::
"All right then, you may go." Janeway made a mental note to keep an eye on Tom.
Tom got up and hightailed it out to the bridge anxious to be at the helm where he could then gather his wits. Tom used flying the ship to center himself. He could always think more clearly while flying Voyager. Tom wasn't sure how he felt about the prospect of Ayala's return to duty. He hadn't been able to bottom since the rape, before the rape he had loved to be bottom to Chakotay's top. He really didn't like the thought of running into the man who was responsible for this change. He needed to feel in control of sex with Chakotay now. He never really liked to be in control before or he might still be with B'Elanna. Letting Chakotay be the stronger one suited Tom's needs exactly. He didn't like this change in his thinking and behavior.
In sickbay. Chakotay's POV.
"Please state....ah, Commander Chakotay."
"I'm not on duty, Doctor. I think we can disperse with the titles."
"Very well Chakotay, please have a seat and I'll begin examining you."
As the doctor examined me he asked me if he could also perform an internal examination.
"Why is there something wrong?"
"Not at all. Twenty-fourth century technology can not tell me certain things that a more hands on approach could."
I sighed and said, "I don't see how, those twenty fourth century gadgets tell you everything."
"I may not always have the benefit of these twenty fourth century gadgets, I need keep my twentieth century skills up to date."
"Computer raise a privacy screen around bio bed two. Chakotay please remove your pants and underclothes and lie down on the bio bed."
I did as instructed all the while wondering what the doctor was about to do that required me to be half naked. He inserted stirrups at the end of the biobed and guided my legs in to position, then picked up this long weird silver object and came toward me with it.
"What the hell is that?"
"This is a speculum." The doctor stated.
"Aaaaah..." Chakotay yelped, "that thing is cold." Now I know why women hate pap smears. I felt like jamming that speculum up the doctor's holographic ass.
"I just need to get a sample from you, I have one more thing to do and I'll be done."
The doctor had this long slender wooden stick with one end that looked like a spatula and was inserting it, then I felt him scrape me deep inside. I jumped a little and asked, "What the hell was that?"
"Hold still. I only took a sample from your cervix Chakotay."
"Oh is that all."
"Relax Chakotay, the worst is over."
The doctor prepared the sample for whatever tests he was going to do. Next he placed a latex glove on one hand and squirted gel on the index and middle finger of the gloved hand. He then inserted the lubed digits in me and placed the other hand on my stomach.
"Try to relax."
"Yeah sure doc." ::You're not the one being poked and prodded.::
"Your uterus feels like it is the right size for six weeks of pregnancy. All right I am done now. You may get dressed." The doctor said as he cleaned the
gel off me with a tissue.
I quickly got dressed and left before he changed his mind. I practically ran to our quarters. Once there I showered and redressed, then decided to have a nap. When I woke up it was lunch time and I was starving.
I went to the messhall in search of something edible. Tom was sitting with Harry and B'Elanna. I went and grabbed some vegetarian stew and joined them.
"Hi." B'Elanna and Harry responded.
"Hi love." Tom responded.
"B'Elanna has the doctor ever performed an internal exam on you?" Chakotay
"I damn near shoved the speculum up his ass."
"You should have."
"So Harry you want to get together one of these days and fire up the Captain Proton simulation?" Tom asked in an effort to change the subject.
"Sounds great." Harry responded.
"I should have, just to see the look on his face. Damn am I ever hungry." Chakotay said.
"I would like to see that as well. I've always had a healthy appetite, but I've felt hungrier too." B'Elanna responded.
"What's a speculum?" Harry asked.
"You don't want to know." Tom answered.
All three turned and fixed Tom with an inquisitive stare.
"Exactly how would you know what a speculum is?" B'Elanna asked.
"Sickbay training." Tom explained.
"Uh huh, yeah, sure flyboy, whatever you say." B'Elanna teased.
"Contrary to popular belief, I am not some sort of sexual deviant." Tom
"Yeah you are, why do you think I love you?" Chakotay said with a wink and wide smile, dimples and all.
"Okay sure, I'm out of here." Tom said sounding definitely pissed off as he got up from the table and left.
"What's with up with Tom?"
"I don't know B'Elanna, but I intend to find out."
"Good, then let me know, I don't like it when he responds to my teasing like that. It usually means something big is on his mind."
"I know he had a meeting with the Captain, mayby that's got something to do with it." Harry offered.
The rest of the day went by with out any troubles from the delta quadrant. Tom almost wished something would happen to get his mind off of Ayala.
That evening. Chakotay's POV
"Tom what happened this afternoon?"
"What do you mean?"
"B'Elanna and I were only jesting. Usually you give as good as you get. So why did you take off? Does the meeting you had with Kathryn have anything to do with it?"
"How did you know about the meeting?"
"Harry told me after you left the table."
"Tom, I know you better than that. Now, give."
"Cha, it was just a meeting."
"No, it wasn't. Your actions told me differently. Now give me the truth."
"Okay! She informed me that Ayala is being released."
"Oh fuck. How are you feeling about this Tom?"
"Not good. I don't want to see him ever again. But I know that's not possible, our crew is too small for our paths not to cross eventually. And I don't like that I haven't been able let you top me since the rape."
"Are you worried about how you will react if and when you run into Ayala?"
"Understandable, I feel the same way."
"Let's not talk about this anymore, I just want to go to bed and hold you."
Much later, the middle of the night to be exact. Chakotay's POV.
"Tom, wake up." I shook Tom awake, ordered the lights on at twenty percent and
asked, "Tom do you think I'm sexy?"
"You're waking me up in the middle of the night to ask me if "you're sexy"?"
Tom had this 'here we go again' expression on his face.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Like you're hoping for the red alert klaxon to go off."
"Because I don't know how to answer that question."
"Why?" I demanded.
"I don't know what to say for fear that you will take it the wrong way."
"Oh, well do you think I'm sexy?"
"Honey, you have always turned me on. As far as I know you have never doubted my passion for you before, I hope you're not starting to now"
"No...I just feel unnerved somehow...you used to date B'Elanna before you dated me...'er...and well now I am 'female' for awhile and...I'm scared that you're gonna like me this way too much and when I'm male again you'll want a woman."
"Are you out of your mind? How can you say that?"
"I don't know."
"Didn't the Doc explain that the high levels of estrogen might cause emotional
"Is that all you think my feelings are? Just hormones?"
"Yes, unless there's something you're not telling me."
"No, now you're sounding paranoid. Mayby it is hormones, I don't know. Perhaps
I'm going crazy."
"Yes, but...." he opened his mouth to say more but I cut him off.
"You didn't let me finish."
"My lips are sealed."
"If you would have let me finish, I would have said, 'yes, but you're hot when you're crazy'." He looked at me like with desire filled eyes.
"Yup. Good enough to eat." Tom lewdly threatened.
All I could do was groan in response.
He proceeded to follow through with his threat. It wasn't as if I had never experienced oral sex before. Just never from a female perspective. I knew how it felt to receive a blow job, this was a whole different ball game. His tongue was working pure magic on me and then suddenly stopped.
I looked up to see Tom get off the bed and stand up , never taking his eyes off of me. The way he was looking at me almost made me come on the spot. He must have sensed the effect he was having on me, because he got this look in his eyes as he started to stroke his erection. He gestured for me to follow suit. I wasn't sure if I could. This body still felt sort of alien.
He kept stroking himself, and started to moan. I couldn't stand it anymore and my hand slowly travelled across my stomach and down until it eventually found my clitoris. I couldn't believe how beautiful it felt. My other hand instantly started to stroke my breast and pinch the nipple. A long moan escaped from deep in my throat as I started to slip my finger in and out of myself. "Tom!" I
I pushed my self out towards him, an open invitation for him to take me, but instead of mounting me, however, he walked around to the side of the bed and let his erection quiver above my open mouth like an over size tootsie roll. He didn't even have to ask, I just naturally took it into my mouth and started to suck him off.
He crawled on to the bed and carefully positioned himself with a knee on either side of my face and resumed feasting on me. I could barely concentrate on giving him a blow job as he was performing expertly on my clitoris. It didn't take too long before I felt my orgasm rip through me, causing me to shudder. The vibration triggered Tom's orgasm. After coming back to reality Tom slowly pushed off of me and flopped on the bed with a sigh.
"That was incredible."
"I am surprised you can talk Cha, usually you've passed out by now."
"That was the other me. I'm hungry actually."
Tom looked at the chronometer and asked, "You're hungry...at three in the morning?"
"Yes, I am going to go and replicate my self something to eat. Care to join me?"
"Sure, but not to eat. I'll just keep you company."
A few minutes later found Tom eating ice cream happily along with Chakotay.
"I thought you said you weren't going to eat anything."
"That was before you ordered rocky road mixed with butterscotch ripple ice cream."
"Oh I see."
"You know what Cha, I love you. Your gender is not important. You are."
"That came out of left field."
"No it didn't. Earlier you were asking me if I thought you were sexy and it sounded to me like you were doubting my love for you because of some misguided idea that I may suddenly decide to become heterosexual. But you are wrong because I love you for who you are. I love to spend time with you as a friend and as a lover, I will never regret marrying you. Please don't doubt my love for you."
"I love you, Tom."
"Good. Let's go back to bed."
The two went back to bed and slept entwined in each others arms as the ship flew placidly through the delta quadrant.