Title:  Twice Again
Author:  Cheryl Forbes
Fandom:  Star Trek:  Voyager
Pairing:  Chakotay/Tom Paris
Rating:  NC 17
Series:  1 of ?
Email for feedback:  forbesc@skyia.com
Disclaimer:   Voyager and her crew are the property of Paramount and
not me.  Whatever.

Summary:  In answer to Leone's 30 day challenge.  Tom's 30 days in
the brig have devastating consequences, so Captain Janeway goes back
in time to suspend the sentence and hoping to correct what went
wrong.  Unfortunately events don't go as planned the first time
around.  Will the second?

It was a hollow place.

Almost as hollow as she felt, she thought with chagrin.  She would
have laughed at the small joke if she had the heart.

She didn't want to be here but what choice did she have?  She had
been once already and that had gone horribly, horribly wrong.

What made her think a second time was going to make things any
better?  She didn't but again, what choice did she have?  She had to
do something to correct her interference.

The howling wind whipped through the ruins and at her short locks as
she folded her knees, sat on her heels and waited to be acknowledged.



Thirty days earlier.

"The guardian of what?"

Kathryn was glad to see the doctor's presence at the ambassador's
reception.  She saw little enough of her former and much missed
shipmates since Voyager's return to the Alpha quadrant ten years
previous and his attendance at this boring function was a rare
treat.  With Voyager permanently retired to the Utopia Planetia
shipyard, her valiant crew had gone their separate ways and the only
time she saw any of them now were at official events such as these.
"Forever, now will you please keep voice down?  I'm not supposed to
be talking to anyone about this, up to and including Starfleet's
Chief of Staff."  Growled the doctor.

"Then why are you?"  She replied in a over dramatic whisper, making a
display of shifting her eyes back and forth over her wineglass as if
looking for enemy agents.

The doctor raised his eyebrows in exasperation and gave her one of
his famous `looks'.  It showed borderline disrespect and from anyone
else she wouldn't have tolerated it but this was one of her closest,
dearest and yes, oldest friends after all.  Besides she was in too
good of a mood to let something so small ruin it.

Hiding a smirk, Kathryn allowed the doctor to steer her into one of
the more quieter and secluded corners of the banquet hall.  When he
bundled her behind a potted plant cloak and dagger style, she had to
bite her bottom lip to keep from laughing aloud.  The only thing that
stopped her was the dead serious expression on his holographic face.

"Do you remember Commander Chakotay?"  He said in a hush keeping in

"Chakotay?"  The name was like a thunderbolt to her heart.  It had
been a long time since she'd heard it other than in her nightmares.
To hear it now after all these years was painful and struck her dumb
with shock.  Suddenly all the fun went out this game.

"I've seen him Admiral."

"That's not possible.  He's, he's.-" Kathryn managed to eek out.  Her
throat constricted and became as dry as a Vulcan desert.

"Dead?  Yes I know Admiral, I pronounced him."  The EMH said gravely.

"Then how?"

"In the Guardian's portal."

Answering the questioning look in her eyes, the doctor explained his
outrageous statement.

As part of a select expedition he had been recruited to study the
self-named phenomena known as the Guardian of Forever.  The project
was classed P-119, which meant it was more than classified; it was a
locked and sealed highly guarded secret.  Kathryn guessed the
sentient time rift's existence and location was probably only known
by a handful of top brass and after she heard the doctor's
description, she understood why.

The portal was not only self-aware.  It was friendly.  It wanted
people to use it and in the hands of the inexperienced, that could be
disastrous.  As example of that risk, the EMH had related to her an
incident involving Admiral James T. Kirk a hundred years past.

By preventing a death, one of his crew had wiped out the entire
existence of Starfleet.  It had been a small thing, saving that one
life but in the grand scale it had been catastrophic.  Fortunately
the situation had been resolved and some lessons had been learned.
The entity was a fascinating but as the Enterprise had discovered,
dangerously so.

As the scientist in her took over, the pain and hurt of Chakotay's
death on Voyager lessened and allowed her to ask questions without
clamping up.

"You said you saw him in the Guardian.  How?  Where?"

"The portal flashes random images of what was, what is and what is
yet to be.  It was during one of those cycles I saw the commander.
He was on Voyager, in his quarters talking with you."

Ah yes, one of their late night dinners.  Kathryn closed her eyes
seeing him there in her mind.  Oh how she missed those evenings.  The
pleasant conversations that often lead to debates and sometimes she
thought wryly, arguments were what kept her going when the
responsibility of getting Voyager home seemed to difficult to
endure.  Chakotay always had the ability to ease her stress and help
her to see things more clearly.  The stalwart first officer had been
her rock, her confidante and her best friend.  When he had taken his
life in ritual suicide, a piece of her had died with him.

For the most part, it was a good memory and she thanked the doctor
for bringing it back to her.

"No, no, no.  I'm not speaking of Captain Janeway but Admiral

"Admiral?  You must have been mistaken Doctor.  Chakotay was gone two
years by the time my older self arrived to take us home through the
Borg conduit.  He never met that admiral or this one."  She finished
while tapping the four solid gold pips at her collar.

"May I remind you Admiral, I'm a hologram and as such, have eidetic
memory.  I forget nothing and I know what I saw."  He paused to clear
his throat.  It was an affectation the EMH had acquired when he
wanted to make a point.  "I saw what yet could be."

"What are you saying?"  She sipped at the red wine from the glass in
her hand to wet her parched throat and grimaced.  It was usually her
favorite, a good vintage from a small off world vineyard but tonight
it seemed bitter.

"Have you ever considered what would have happened if it had been
Lieutenant Paris at the helm instead of the commander when we crossed
into Devore space?   If Tom had been at his post and not in the brig
serving time for that Moneon fiasco?"

Kathryn looked sharply at the doctor.  Of course she had considered
it.  Many nights alone in anguished regret and wishing desperately
for Chakotay's objective council she had dissected her reasons for
sentencing Tom to brig time.  However she had ended her futile
musings realizing that if she continued to doubt her decision she
would cease to function effectively as Voyager's captain and
eventually drive herself crazy with guilt.

"You're trying to second guess history Doctor.  I can't know that Tom
would have been able to avoid hitting the refugees' ship any better
than Chakotay did.  There was a nebula, we were flying blind."

"Perhaps, perhaps not.  But I do know one thing.  Tom Paris had
already lived through a similar incident,"

"Caldik Prime, yes I remember reading it in his dossier."

"Yes and he survived.  Mr Paris didn't kill himself in a fit of grief
over lost lives."

"Chakotay didn't have a fit Doctor.  He grieved, yes but he was
rational right up until the end.  He took his own life as a way of
evening out the scales.  It was a traditional and very brave

"And you understood?  If it was OK with native tradition, it was OK
with you?"

"No of course not.  I would have tried to find a way to talk him out
of it but.-"

"He didn't tell you, yes I know.  You weren't aware of his intentions
until you read his note after the fact."

"Yes."  She replied sadly.

"And while were on the topic, what about what happened to our chief
pilot after we arrived back in the Alpha quadrant?"

"I, I don't know."

"Of course you don't, nobody does.  Mr Paris has been missing for
going on ten years now.  His own guilt at not being at the helm and
Chakotay's subsequent suicide drove him away from all of you, even
Harry.  Tom became a hermit on Voyager only leaving his cabin for
duty shifts and after we got back home, boom he was gone.  He had the
whole galaxy to hide out in then."

It was true.  The commander's death had reshaped the bright and
sparkling Tom Paris into a dull and lifeless individual.

He had just been released from the brig when Chakotay had completed
his ritual.  In fact it had been the formally tenacious blond who had
discover his body.  Afterwards the pilot had never been the same.  He
had retreated into himself, only showing his sullen face to friends
and colleagues while on duty or at staff meetings.  To this day
Kathryn still wondered why he'd been in the commander's quarters that
late at night but given Tom's new subdued personality she never had
the courage to ask.  Guilt prevented her from delving too deeply into
the subject.

"So you see what you have to do to save them both."  The doctor said
interrupting her chain of thought.

"And what would that be Doctor?  Visiting the Guardian of Forever?"
She replied with a sharp edge to her voice, the renewed pain of her
first officer's death causing her to hide her sorrow in sarcasm.  It
was either that or crying and admirals did not cry at Starfleet

"Yes," He replied taking her seriously.  "And reverse the sentence so
Tom isn't in the brig serving his 30 days but at the helm where he
was supposed to be all those years ago."  The doctor paused and spoke
with measured eloquence, firmly but with a kind compassion
reminiscent of a Bajoran kai offering redemption to a Cardassian
repentant.  "It's the right thing to do Admiral."

But was it the right thing?  Time was suppose to be linear, and the
past, solid and unchangeable.  That was what she'd been taught and
what she'd always believed.  Oh she'd had her share of tangles with
temporal dynamics, what with the number of rifts and alternate
timelines Voyager had encountered on the journey home, but those
events had been beyond her control.  They had just happened and she'd
gone with the flow.  However to visit the Guardian and deliberately
try change the course time was something all together different.

To Kathryn it was little to close to playing God, and as Starfleet's
present chief of staff she already had enough responsibly weighing
down her shoulders without adding all of existence to it.

But then again it was an incredible opportunity to set things right.
Why would she be given the means and the tools, if she were not meant
to use them?  With one small act she could bring both of her lost
officers back to her.  It was decided then.  She would try.  She had
to.  It was a chance of a lifetime.

Chakotay's lifetime.


Somewhere else thirty days earlier.

"They're not quite ripe enough but in another week, ten days tops I
think they will be.  I think this year's harvest will yield our best
yet.  What do you think Chak?"

Tom Paris, formerly chief helmsman of the Federation starship Voyager
and presently chief wine master and sole owner of Tattoo vineyards
carefully pulled a cluster of plump blood red grapes from the pocket
of his white windbreaker.  He turned them over tenderly in his hand
and displayed them proudly.

"See the green at stock edge Chak?  If we pick now, we'll compromise
the sweetness.  The acidic concentration will be too high and the
wine will have a weedy taste.  Another two, three days and the tannin
levels will even out and we'll end up with one hell of smooth tasting
Pinot Noir."

The proprietal edge to his report softened into the personal.  "I
know you prefer white but I swear you'll like this batch.  And if you
don't, I'll get your brother to run us over some his private stash.
He won't mind, he never does.  Whenever I call he comes and, and, oh
fuck."  His voice thickened before failing completely.

Letting the just picked fruit fall through his outstretched fingers,
the tall, sun weathered blond dropped to his knees.  The fall was
hard, crushing the previously precious grapes into the faded denim of
his jeans and snapping his back molars together with an audible
click.  Tom noticed neither discomfort as hot tears burned a trail
down his tanned face.

"You fucking bastard."  He spat in a hoarse whisper.

It had been more than twelve years but his anger was still fresh and
raw as if it was yesterday.  It was tempered richly with grief and
love but those tender, soft-shelled emotions were harder to
articulate, even to a dead man.

"You should have been here."  He said bitterly as reached out to
caress the cold granite of the headstone with his fingertips.

Here was Dorvan V.  Tom had settled, no fled was more appropriate, on
the first officer's home planet after being released by Starfleet
Command upon his debriefing and return to the Alpha quadrant.  Back
then he had reasoned it had been as good as place as any in his
desire to avoid the post media rush Voyager's return had generated
but in truth, it had been the only place.  Anywhere else he would
have gone stark raving mad.

The lush forests and the rich meadows of this largely agragarian
culture had grounded him and brought him closer to the man whose
presence he missed keenly.  Tom had bought the small winery next to
his gravesite to bring him even closer.

He was sane here and most times with exception of days like these, he
was reasonably happy, although his definition of happiness had
changed some in the last ten years.

At its apex, the ebullient emotion had first captured him while
imprisoned in an entirely different manner.  Seven days into a thirty
day sentence Tom had discovered he was in love for the first time.

Having nothing much to do while he served his sentence for doing what
he felt compelled to do on Monea, he had written a letter of
explanation to his father.  By the end of the soul baring piece he
realized it hadn't been the Admiral's forgiveness he'd been striving
for.  It wasn't his distant father's respect he craved but
surprisingly another's much closer to what he presently called home.
And respect wasn't all he wanted.

The lack of distraction the four cold walls of the cell afforded had
allowed him to explore further into his jumbled psyche.

Tom knew he had feelings, strong ones that more often then not
dictated his actions and landed him into hot water.  His present
residence being a prime example but acknowledging that didn't mean he
understood them.  Sometimes intense emotions such as loyalty and
desire literally blindsided him making him do things that if he
thought twice about, he probably wouldn't have done.  He was ruled by
his heart and not by his head he admitted and now he was hit by yet
another wild emotion, a new one called love.

If not for the force field barring his exit, he would have rushed
immediately out and acted on it.  Fortunately because of the
captain's sentence, he was forced to consider his new found
feelings.  Otherwise most likely he would have tried to seduce the
older man, his body responding first to physical side of love and
then offending him somehow before he had a chance to explain his
sincerity.  In short he would have blown it.  His confinement made
his heart see that it was the head that needed to be dealt with

He would have to tell Chakotay he loved him before making love to

Tom had devoted the next three weeks of his brig time to making the
most important speech of his life and upon his release, he had made a
beeline to the commander's quarters to recite it.  Unfortunately it
had been too late.  There hadn't been anybody there to listen.

"You fucking coward."  Said the distraught man kneeling on the

He had shut down after that, his grief overwhelming him.  Too afraid
to feel anything, he had kept to his quarters when possible, avoiding
any interaction that might make him respond so strongly again.  It
had been lonely but he had his grief and later his anger to keep him

Screw tradition.  Chakotay had taken his life because he couldn't
live with what he'd done and not because some ancient ritual demanded
it.  Having been there himself, Tom had understood the older man's
horror at being responsible for other's deaths.  The ritual had just
been an excuse for him not to deal with it.

"Dammit Chakotay.  I could have helped you."  Tom waited a moment for
his anger to flow out of him before speaking again.  He did not his
next words tainted with the dark emotion.  "I loved you."  He
whispered.  "Still do."

Wiping his face with the sleeve of his windbreaker, Tom stood.

"Gotta go babe.  There's work to be done.  I'll see you tomorrow,
okay?"  Tom cocked his head as if listening for a response from his
forever silent love.  "Okay then.  Bye."

Jumping back into his hover car, a happier but still very lonely Tom
Paris headed for home.


What might have been.

What the hell was she thinking?

Voyager's first officer stormed through the ships corridors berating
his captain's recent unexplained change of heart.

Although he didn't totally believe in the original sentence, he did
believe in being consistent.  It was vital aspect to the chain of
command.  You made a decision and stood by it.  Otherwise you ran the
risk of losing the respect of your crew and when that happened, chaos

Chaos?  Chakotay halted his rampage and stopped to the left of the
turbo lift.

What the hell am I talking about and more importantly, when the hell
did I become such a drama queen?  Chaos indeed.  Next I'll be
rambling on about the forces of evil and the end of the universe.
Spirits man, get a hold of yourself.

He took a deep cleansing breath before entering the lift.

So what if Tom Paris only serves seven of his thirty days.  Chakotay
didn't like the idea imprisoning the man in the first place.  The
demotion yes, he did deserve some punishment but since the pilot's
refusal to obey the captain's orders wasn't done out of malice,
sentencing him to brig time had seemed a little over the top.

The lift stopped and Chakotay exited feeling a little more in control
of his anger.

Okay then so why was he acting like an idiot?  A few crewman passed
him in the hall and he nodded absently to them while noting they were
holding hands.  New lovers, he surmised as he continued to his
destination.  Nice.

Distracted by the sweet display his mind started to wander to his own
romantic fantasies.  It didn't take much since his thoughts were
already halfway there.  He had after all been thinking of Tom.

Again he stopped abruptly.

Was that it?  Was it merely because the current situation had to do
with the affable pilot that he was acting like a spoilt child having
a temper tantrum?  Was he jealous?  Oh god he was.  Kathryn had
showed the younger man a bit of kindness and he had started
questioning her motives.

Did he secretly believe that she had done it to get in his pants?
Chakotay shook his head.  That was ridiculous.  He knew Kathryn had
too much integrity for that and besides she wasn't the one up nights
coveting the younger man's body in her dreams.  He was guilty one in
that scenario.  What a perv he was.  He laughed.  Yeah a pervert with
one big yellow stripe down his back.

Smiling, he got his feet moving again.

I should tell him and get it over with.  Just walk right up to him
and say you make me so hot I've had to wear a size bigger pant these
last few years.  Yeah right Chakotay and then you can go out and
conquer the Borg.  He didn't have enough guts or stupidity to set
himself for that kind of humiliation.  Tom would probably laugh in
his face.

What would someone that young and that beautiful want with an old
warhorse like him?  No, it was better to continue lusting after the
pilot from a far.  That way he could keep `his' integrity intact.  It
was pretty difficult giving an order to someone who thinks of you as
an old fool.  That, truly would be chaos, well for his pride anyway.

Chakotay reached the end of his journey and pressed the door chime.

After a couple of seconds, Tom let him in.


What might have been. . . a few minutes later.

"Consider it parole."  Said the commander standing ramrod straight in
the middle of his living room.  "When you're not on duty, you'll
remain alone in your quarters.  No messhall, no Sandrine's and
certainly no visitors."

"For the next three weeks I'm a hermit.  Got it."  Tom replied unable
to hide the grin on his face.  He was so ecstatically happy that it
was either smile like a love sick puppy or explode and `that' he
hoped to do later, preferably all over this gorgeous man before him.

The commander frowned at his smile.  "Ensign I mean it.  That's an

"Yes sir and thank you sir."

"For what?  Punishing you?"

"No for getting me out the brig.  I know you must have done some
fancy talking to change the captain's mind and I want you to know I
appreciate it."

That had been the icing on his cake.  Knowing that the man he
discovered after writing the letter to his father he loved, cared
enough about him to fight for him.  Visions of knights in shining
armour came to mind.  The regal and proud Commander Chakotay would
make a perfect champion.

"I didn't do anything.  The captain changed her mind on her own.  I'm
sorry Ensign but if it had been up to me, I would let you finish out
your sentence."

The image of a shining knight wavered.  "You wanted me locked up?"
Please, please say no.

"No of course not but the decision had been duly logged and
recorded.  Reversing it was in my opinion bad form."

"Bad form?"  What the hell was that supposed to mean?  This
conversation was beginning to piss him off.  The commander wasn't
acting anything like a hero.  No more like a bureaucrat and Tom never
cared for that kind of cowardly ilk.

"Yes.  In principle, the chain of command can't survive if."

"Fuck the chain of command."  He snapped.  "We're light years from
anyone that would give a shit.  You did want me locked up."

"No, I opposed the captain when she first made the decision,"

"But changed your mind later."  He sneered.

"Stop putting words in my mouth!  Dammit Tom it killed me to know you
were in the brig.  It took every ounce of will power I had not to go
down there and free you!"

"As in rescue me?"  Tom asked hopefully.  He desperately wanted to
like this wonderful man again.


Oh that was truer to form.  Chakotay was the valiant man he believed
him to be.

"And then what would you have done with me?  Claim me as yours?"
Just saying the words sent a chill down Tom's spine.

"Mine?"  Chakotay's brown eyes were clouded with confusion.

"You know if you had, I wouldn't have minded."  Tom purred as he
moved closer to the flustered commander.  "I still wouldn't my
handsome warrior."

Indecision played against confusion in the dark orbs as his words
struck home.

Okay now kiss me, Tom prompted silently.  Stop wondering if you
should or not, just take me in your big strong arms, place your lips
on mine and kiss me.

He laid a hand on Chakotay's cheek hoping to hasten his decision.
The older man moaned low in throat at the touch as he leaned in and
covered his mouth with his full soft lips.  The big strong arms
followed a moment later.

Locked in his tight embrace, Tom molded himself to the hard planes of
Chakotay's body.  The quiver of the well-toned muscles of his hero's
abdomen flitted against Tom's belly and sent shock waves down to his
groin.  He no sooner felt his cock react to the sensuous ripples when
Chakotay palmed his ass and began to slowly pulsate into him.  With
each throbbing beat from the other man's hips Tom could feel his
strength and desire, thrilling him beyond measure.

Lying alone in his cell, Tom could only hope that the commander would
welcome his advances like this.  Being fucked by Chakotay was all
he'd be able to think about.  A number of times his hand had strayed
down to his dick but he had resisted in on the side of modesty.  He
hadn't wanted to whack off in front of the duty officer and be the
main topic of conversation that night in Sandrine's.  He was in love,
not stupid.

In the same way the commander worked his body, heating it and
bringing it to a slow boil, he laid claim to his lips.  Teasing and
tasting, Chakotay's lips and tongue mapped his mouth.

His being was becoming flooded with sensation, tingling from the nape
of his neck to the back of his knees and very soon he would reach
critical.  The older man however by his unhurried pace seemed
unaffected but the rapid heaving of his chest and the trembling of
his limbs told Tom otherwise.  Chakotay was in a very controlled
state.  He was definitely aroused but was keeping himself in check,
taking his time.

Well that was all well and good for him but Tom was nearing exploding
in his pants.  He didn't want to wait, couldn't actually.  They
needed to get naked and they needed to do it real soon.  He extracted
his mouth from Chakotay's.  With their foreheads touching, he placed
his request.

"You need to take me now."

Chakotay smiled lazily.  "I need?"

Oh shit, first foreplay and now word play.  Tom didn't have enough
oxygen left in his brain for the second.

"Okay I need."  He replied in breathless exasperation.  "And badly."

Still smiling Chakotay slipped a hand between their meshed bodies and
deftly opened his trousers.  The cool air of the cabin assailed Tom's
now exposed erection briefly before Chakotay's warm palm encased it.
When he started stroking with the same slow rhythm, Tom closed his
eyes and let his head fall back.  Immediately the hand on his cock
stopped and another was at the base of his skull setting his head
back upright.

"Open your eyes Tom and watch mine."  The commander ordered.

Tom licked his lips and nodded numbly.  Chakotay wanted to watch his
eyes as he came.  Fine, he'd do his best but suspected that when his
climax hit, he'd be unable to keep'em open any better then he could
if he were sneezing.

"Good my young beauty."  His hand started moving again and Tom let
out a gasp.  "Does that feel good?"

Oh fuck, did it?  Was the sky blue?  "Yesss."  He hissed through his

"And this?"  Chakotay began squeezing his shaft with each upward
stroke.  Tom's balls tightened and throbbed in time.

Struggling to keep his eyes opened, he answered in the affirmative or
at least an approximation of it. "Oh god Chak, oh god, oh god, ohhh.-
"  His lids finally fell.

Losing his battle with vision, Tom pressed his sweating forehead into
Chakotay's brow as his orgasm tore through his body.

"Oh yes Tom, come for me.  That's right, come for me."  The older man
said in a husky voice thick with arousal. "Oh spirits you're
beautiful, so goddam beautiful."

Kissing his lips softly, Chakotay continued to murmur endearments as
he milked his cock dry with his talented hand.  When his knees
buckled, the older man let go of his dick and caught him under the
shoulders.  Tom cried out at the loss of warmth at his groin.

"It's Okay Tom, we're not done yet."  His lover said in smooth
comforting voice.

Supporting his weight Chakotay guided him into the bedroom.


What might have been. . . a few heartbeats later.

Slowly, Chakotay slowly, just breathe and try again.

Gulping air into oxygen starved lungs, he made another attempt to
undo the clasp on his trousers.  This time his numb fingers did his
bidding and he slipped out of his last vestige of clothing.  Tom was
already on the bed gloriously naked, his pale skin still flushed with
orgasm waiting to be claimed.

Claimed.  Oh god he'd almost fainted when he finally understood what
the magnificent blond was offering.

The first time he'd said the word Chakotay thought he misheard him,
that his ears were picking up only what he wanted to hear or more
frightening, that his fantasies had started bleeding into reality.
That had scared him for a very long moment.  It hadn't been until Tom
touched his cheek, confirming that what had been said was indeed
real, that the icy cold fingers that had gripped his heart let go.
Then another fear had risen.

In all of his forty-seven years, Chakotay had never suffered a bout
of performance anxiety, until now.

He'd always been an excellent lover, especially now with experience
on his side.  He knew that.  It wasn't an arrogant boast but a much-
deserved fact and one he took great pride in.

When he made love he put his pleasure second to his partner's, which
ultimately fueled his own anyways making it an extremely satisfying
encounter for both.  However his previous lovers had been mortals and
not young gods who only came to him in his dreams.

Rationally he knew that Tom was no different than any other living,
breathing human being but on another level, oh spirits.  Nothing was
more important than performing well for this young man.  Timing was
going to be everything.

In the other room he'd had to bite the inside of his cheek to stem
his own orgasm as he brought Tom to his.  The younger man would
recover quickly enough but at his age he'd only have one shot and
didn't want to waste it while still dressed.  Chakotay wanted to come
inside of Tom.  The hand job was meant to slow him down and as a
safeguard against him having one before him.  In his present
condition Chakotay hadn't trusted himself not finish before Tom if
they headed into the bedroom first.

So he'd had held back and played it cool.  It had been difficult,
especially while watching Tom come but he'd made it through without
shaming himself.


He was startled to see Tom sitting on his heels before him at the end
of bed.  He must have been more wrapped up in his nervous musings
than he thought not to have noticed his movement.

Reaching down he brushed his blond hair away from his face with both
hands.  Tom parted his lips and tipped his head up for a kiss.  This
time he held nothing back as plundered the younger man's mouth
passionately.  It was time to do some claiming.

Pushing Tom back, never losing contact with his sweet mouth Chakotay
eased his body over him.  Once prone he let his hands worship the
tender form beneath him.  The soft hair on Tom's chest and the softer
skin of his shoulders, sides and hips became his new totems.  He
could spend all night paying homage to this splendid body but he
didn't have the much time.  His cock throbbing painfully and weeping
so freely he doubted lube would be necessary for penetration.

"Lube."  He said in a rush erring on the side of safety.

He rolled to the side to allow Tom to fetch a tube from the night
table.  When the pilot returned he held his hand out for it.  Tom
complied by flipping the lid and squirting a generous amount of the
viscous gel into his palm.  That done the precocious blond lay back
with his knees parted and whispered for him to hurry, like he had a
choice Chakotay thought ruefully.

Forfeiting efficiency over extended foreplay, Chakotay quickly
prepared Tom for entry and then swiped a hand over his erection.  He
winced at the slight contact.

"You Okay?"  Tom asked propping himself up on his elbows.

"Yeah just a little over stimulated."  He admitted.

"Because of me?  Really?"  The pilot closed his eyes and flopped back
down on the mattress.   "Oh man I don't believe it.  I make you
horny, oh fuck."  He opened his eyes.  "Do you know how happy that
makes me?"

Chakotay positioned his hips between Tom's pale thighs deciding to be
stunned later.  With careful fingers he leveled his penis with Tom's
glistening hole barely managing to pull them away before his pelvis
shot forward in an instinctive thrust.

"Oh yes!"  His lover screamed as he threw his long legs up around his
neck. "Fuck me Chak!"

Grabbing Tom's shins for leverage where they draped over his
shoulders, Chakotay rammed repeatedly into his silken heat.  Looking
down he spied Tom's arm in a flurry as he worked to bring himself
off, then he looked to his face.  Oh spirits!  The erotic sight was
the last straw.  He couldn't have pictured the total look of
abandonment and pleasure on that beautiful face in million years.
Nothing in his dreams even came close.

With his heart pounding in his chest, he fucked Tom like a madman and
then roaring loud enough to shake the bulkheads, he erupted.  As his
seed rushed hot from his body to lover's, his leg muscles shivered
with exertion.  Biting his bottom lip, Chakotay struggled to stay
upright until every drop had left him.  Finally spent, he collapsed
forward stopping short his fall with his elbows.  Tom legs slid down
his sides signaling the younger man was also finished.

"Happy.  Would die without you."  Tom mumbled before dropping off to

Chakotay laughed, surprised he had the breath to do so.  He, a mere
mortal had made a young god happy.  Incredible.

Being careful not to wake him, he lifted himself from Tom and
resettled along side his long slim body.  He held the younger man
close and cherished his poor exhausted prize.

Tomorrow he decided.  He would let him sleep late.  Chakotay had
already been scheduled to take the helm so he'd take his shift.
Except for a nebula, Devore space seemed fairly routine, so he
shouldn't encounter any problems, well except for Kathryn.  She would
give him hell later for covering for Tom but right now he was too
happy himself to care.

Besides, what could one more day hurt?