Title:  MINE  Part Four
Author:  Cheryl Forbes
Fandom:  Star Trek:  Voyager
Pairing:  Chakotay/Tom Paris
Rating:  NC 17
Series:  4 of ?
Email Address for feedback: forbesc@skyia.com
Disclaimer:  Voyager and her crew belong to Paramount and not me.
Whatever.

Summary:  He loves me, he loves me not.
 

"Mr Paris will you please lie back down!"

"Yeah in a minute Doc."  Tom swung his legs over the side of the bio-
bed.  The captain and Tuvok had just entered Sickbay.  "Tuvok!"

The captain approached first and relief flooded her eyes.  Tuvok kept
a respectful distance behind her.  Her voice was tight as she turned
to the EMH.  "You said he was dead."

"Correction Captain what I said was that Mr Paris had died."  The
captain's lips pursed and her eyebrows rose.  She wasn't getting the
difference.  The EMH tried to explain.  "He went into ventricular
fibrillation and his heart stopped, so in effect he died.  If hadn't
been for Mr Tuvok's monitoring and Lieutenant Torres' spectacular
skill with the transporter, I might not have had the time to
resuscitate him."

Kathryn gripped the Doc's arm.  "A word of advice Doctor.  Next time
start with the part about him being alive, got it."  She squeezed a
little harder in emphasis not caring that the EMH didn't experience
pain.

"Ah, got it Captain."  He humbly stepped back and disengaged his
bicep from the captain's grasp before running his medical tri-corder
over the lieutenant again.  "Besides a mild enzyme imbalance Mr Paris
will be fine.  I would however like him to remain in Sickbay a few
hours."

"Yeah Doc, whatever."  Tom sat impatiently waiting for him to finish
before addressing Tuvok again.

"Tuvok, it was a data PADD.  It must still be on the holodeck."

"What data PADD Mr Paris?"

"I was almost done running my sims when Vorik came in and gave it to
me and when I activated it, that's when all hell broke loose."

The security officer went over to one of his men standing at the
door, spoke briefly to him and returned to Tom as the man left
Sickbay.

"It would seem that the data PADD must have been the trigger that
caused the explosion and disengaged the holodeck safeties."  Tuvok
paused.  "Unlike the construction of the personal transporter, this
clearly indicates we are dealing with someone with exceptional
technical abilities."

"So that should eliminate alot of the 47 people who were on the
Observation deck, right?"

As Tuvok agreed and bent his head to his own data PADD the doors to
Sickbay swished opened.  Commander Chakotay stood frozen at the
entrance his eyes fixed on the lieutenant. He blinked twice before
rushing across the room and pulling him off the bio-bed and into his
arms.  Tom fell into the embrace, burrowing his head in the
commander's shoulder.

"They said you were dead."

Tom brought his head up and kissed the commander full on the lips
before replying, a smirk graced his face.

"I got better."

Chakotay tried to still his beating heart with few deep breaths as
his hands came up to frame the face of the man who was quickly
becoming his whole world.

"I can see that Poocuh."  He smiled in return and his dimples
blossomed.

With one last soft kiss to the lieutenant's upturned lips he turned
to the security chief.  He slipped his arm around Tom's waist,
keeping a tight hold on him as he spoke.  His voice was hard.

"Tuvok, I want to know who did this, and I want to know now."

Tuvok perceived the commander's anger, and although he did not feel
it, he understood it.  He too would demand answers if one of his
family members were similarly threatened.

"I have commander compiled a short list of possible suspects who
excel in the technical field and with his permission would like Mr
Paris' reaction to them."

Tom shifted, tucking his shoulder under Chakotay's.  "OK, shoot."

"Crewman Mortimer Harren."

"Well I've talked "at" him once or twice but he doesn't really pay me
too much attention."

"Vorik."

"Now that's one guy that gives me the willies.  I think he likes to
watch me."

"Explain."

"Well when ever I see him, whether it's in the messhall or on the
holodeck he's already looking at me.  And when I look away sometimes
I can almost feel his eyes on me, still watching."

"Fascinating." Tuvok made a note on his PADD.  "Ensign Tabor."

"Tabor?"

"Yes his creation of Xenobiologist Crell Moset demonstrated that he
has both extensive holo skills and a deep unresolved anger."

"Hell Tuvok you would too if you were asked to create the Cardassian
that killed your grandfather."  Tom shook his head.  "No, no I don't
think it's him."

"Very well."  He made another notation.  "Crewman Kenneth Dalby."

The lieutenant made a whistling sound.  "Now there's one guy that
really has a hard on for me."  One of Tuvok's elegant eyebrows
rose.  "But I'm pretty sure he'd rather just pound his fists into me
rather than anything else."  He looked Tuvok straight in the
eye.  "You know what I mean?"

"Yes Lieutenant I believe I do."

Chakotay looked over at the captain who shrugged her shoulders and
shook her head.  It seemed that this was the first time she'd heard
about Dalby's animosity towards Tom too.  His hand went to Tom's chin.

"Has he hurt you before?"

Tom almost melted from the concern in the big guy's eyes.  He took
the hand from his chin and placed a gentle kiss in its palm.

"Yeah Chak but that was a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away."
The commander wasn't mollified.  "Look, I know the guy hates me but
really he hasn't laid a finger on me in a very long time. So forget
about it OK?"

He wouldn't but now wasn't the time for settling scores, he'd make
time for that bastard later.  He let his features harden again as he
turned back to Tuvok.

"Who else?"

"Ensign Baytart."

"Pablo?  Naw Tuvok the guy wants my job, not my body.  Next."

"Icheb."

"Oh come on, he's just a kid and besides were buds.  I help him out
with astrometrics when Seven's busy that's all."

"I might remind you Mr Paris that Icheb is an adolescent not a child
and he would be experiencing the pangs of puberty at this stage in
his development.  Combine that with his giving of his cortical
implant to Seven, his behavior could become erratic."

"Yeah maybe but I don't think so.  He's a good kid Tuvok."

"Very well."  The security officer came to last name on his list.  It
was a name that because of sentiment he had almost left off but his
training had convinced him otherwise.  This man had both the
opportunity and the skill to execute a sophisticated holo program
such as the lieutenant had experienced.  He braced himself for Tom's
outrage.

"Ensign Kim."

"Harry?"  Chorused the three officers in Sickbay.  The lieutenant
began to laugh, drawing stares from the other two and Tuvok as well.

"No way Tuvok, not Harry."  Tom took in the faces around him.  The
captain was appalled, Chak was sympathetic and Tuvok, well Tuvok was
Tuvok, all impassive and Vulcan like.

"No really it couldn't be Harry."  The faces didn't change so he
tried to explain.  "Look I know he's smart enough and he does like
me, hell he's my best friend but he doesn't like me in that way."

Tuvok found his voice first.  "You cannot be certain of the nature of
the ensign's feelings towards you."

"Yeah Tuvok I can."  Not wanting to betray a confidence but seeing no
other way he went on.  "You see he's kinda in lust with someone else."

"Who?"  This time it was the commander who spoke.

"You big guy."

"Me?"  Tom sidled up closer to his stunned lover.

"Yeah he sorta told me the other day.  He doesn't want to admit it
and I don't think he plans to do anything about it, but there it
is."  He ran a finger down the front of the commander's uniform.
Chakotay reached out and stopped it as it reached his waistline.

"You're sure Poocuh?"

Tom licked his tattoo. "Yeah baby you're making them pant all the way
from Ops to Conn."

The captain broke out the daze caused by watching her chief pilot
seducing her first officer right in front of her. "I think that's
just a little too much information for me, thank you Lieutenant."
She dragged her concentration back to Tuvok and the matter at
hand.  "What's next?  Mind melds?"

"No Captain.  That would be a little too invasive right now.  The
evidence against these men is purely speculative."

"Very well continue with your investigation as you see fit and keep
me informed."  She turned back to the two men who were still glued at
the hip making a quite an erotic spectacle of themselves.  "Chakotay
make sure Tom gets back to his quarters safely and then meet me in my
ready room."

As Chakotay unsuccessfully grabbed at a pale hand that slipped under
his jacket he replied, "Yes Captain I'll be there in ten."

Trying to keep her gaze at eye level and not at the growing bulge in
Tom's trousers, Kathryn waved a hand out to the commander.  "Make it
thirty."  The response however when it came, came from the lieutenant.

"Yes Ma'am!"

********

"Faster!"

Not really needing to be told but enjoying the entreaty anyway,
Chakotay accelerated the pistoning of his hips.   Watching his cock
slipping in and out of the tight hole of Tom's ass was already
causing him to drive towards a quick completion as it was.

"Oh fuck Chak, faster.faster."

Tom was close which was good because he didn't think he could hold
out much longer himself.  He reached around and grasped his lover's
cock and timed his thrusts in unison with his stroking of the weeping
member.

"Oh gods that's good, baby.  So good, so good...."

As Chakotay's orgasm began, he pumped all his fear, worry and love
into the man before him.  Tom's cries became intelligible as he
roared his release and it wasn't long before the commander felt the
warmth of semen in his hand.  Chak fell forward on his lover's back
fighting the blackness that ringed his consciousness.

Tom straightened his knees and brought the commander down to lay
beside him.  He nestled back relishing the feel of the big body
behind him and waited for Chakotay to wake.   As he began to float
into oblivion himself, soft kisses at his nape signaled his lover's
return to consciousness.

"Oh spirits, I love you Poocuh."

"I love you too baby." Tom turned to lie on his back.  He brushed
Chakotay's mouth with his fingertips.  "Chak, why did you wait so
long?"

The commander's mouth quirked in amusement.  "I went as fast as I
could Poocuh.  I promise."

"No, I mean why did you wait so long to love me?"

Chakotay took Tom's hand from his face and brought it to his chest as
the vulnerability in the man's voice touched his soul.  How did he
answer a question that even he didn't know the answer to?

He remembered seeing the brash young man again on Voyager's bridge
all those years ago.   Back then all he had wanted to do was throttle
him but when that passion had changed from infuriation to
infatuation, he didn't quite know.

Was it a year or was it two?  It just seemed one day he woke up and
started noticing the way Tom smiled or laughed.  It was then he knew
he was falling in love and as he saw the pilot use those same charms
to cope or to help others to do so in times of desperation or strife,
he fell deeper.  So no he hadn't waited very long to love Tom; he had
just waited a long time to tell him that he had.

"Actually baby I don't think I waited very long at all."

"Where I come from Chak, six years, two months and 23 days is along
time."

"Oh believe me baby I was head over heels long before that.  You had
me years ago you know."

"Really?"

"Yes really but it wasn't until that night in Sandrine's playing pool
that I felt brave enough to do anything about it though."

Tom lay back, closed his eyes and considered Chakotay's words.  He
had been terrified that it was the recent situation that had caused
the man to be so kind to him.   He'd read about people who came
closer together when they shared a traumatic experience.  He'd also
read those feelings tended to dissipate after the crisis had passed
but maybe that wouldn't happen here. If Chak loved him before this
fiasco had started it was possible that he would love him when it was
over.  Tom letting his fatalism seep through his reasoning thought
yeah, if he was still alive when it was finally over that is.

"What about you Poocuh?  Do you know when did it happened for you?"

Tom laughed softly, hugged Chakotay to him and touched his forehead
to his.  When his blue eyes were staring deep into those ebony ones
he answered.

"Yes."

"When?"

"When you said hello."

********

He sat on the lounge in his darkened quarters rocking the instrument
of his first message to his chest, his fingers trailing over the
crusted blood was still evident on its bore.  He was hardly aware as
he brought his hand to his mouth smearing the residue over his teeth
and gums.

He couldn't use the computers anymore.  They would be watching for
that now but it didn't matter.  He didn't need the comm system
anymore to know they would be together.  They would be.  He had
failed but he would not fail alone.

If he could not have his love, it was still possible to take it from
the other.  He stood up wiping his hand across his chest, marring the
gold of his uniform.  It was time for a sacrifice.  He knew what he
had to do.

This would be the end.  And in the end, he stood letting the clarinet
fall to the floor, he still would be,

M - I - N - E

END OF PART FOUR

Author's note:  I stole a quote from "Jerry Maguire" that I have
always loved and always wanted to use so please excuse my indulgence,
I still love our Tom better than the other one.