Title: Kian
Author:  Cheryl Forbes
Fandom:  Star Trek:  Voyager
Pairing:  Chakotay/Tom Paris
Rating:  NC 17
Series: 1 of ?
Email Address for feedback:
Disclaimer:  Voyager and her crew belong to Paramount and not me.

Summary:  Tom meets Juliet but falls in love with Romeo.

"Potassium Iodide?"

"Yes it's the main ingredient in hyronalin."

With patience worthy of a commendation, Captain Kathryn Janeway
ignored the annoyance in the Holo Doc's voice.

"I know what it is Doctor.  It's the serum used for radiation
exposure." She looked across the conference table at the viewscreen
opposite her. "What I want to know is why you called me and my
officers here to talk about it."

"Because of the third planet in this system.  It has large deposits
of naturally occurring potassium iodide."  With excitement he rushed
on. "Don't you see Captain?  That never happens!"

Commander Chakotay turned his chair to the EMH.  "Forgive me Doctor
for missing Chemistry 101 at the Academy, but 'I' don't see."

The Doctor straightened his shoulders and cleared his voice, as if
preparing for a lecture.

"Potassium iodide is two separate crystalline elements that are
combined together by artificial means for usage against harmful radio
isotopes. In nature they are very rarely found in the same
environment let alone in the same deposit but somehow on this planet
they do." The exhilaration returned to his voice. "It's chemical
mystery that demands to be investigated!"

"Demands?"  She placed her hands flat against the tabletop. "I'll
admit Doctor that it is interesting but we don't have the time to
stop for research now. In a little more than five days we have a
scheduled meeting to attend in the next system that I have no
intention of being late for. I'm sorry but negotiating safe passage
for Voyager takes precedence."

She was going to dismiss the meeting, but the EMH wouldn't take no
for answer.

"I thought we were suppose to be explorers here!" He moved closer to
the screen increasing the size of his head in the projection. "And
with the way you people have a knack for finding dangerous
this new element could become vital to the crew.  You never know."

Oh that was hitting below the belt.  By mentioning the safety of her
crew, he'd hit her soft spot and Kathryn found she couldn't dismiss
the issue out of hand.

It wouldn't do for her people to become affected by some alien
radiation that conventional means couldn't cure. Not wanting this to
be another situation she'd regret later, she tried to think of a way
of conceding to the doctor's request and still make the conference.

"Mr Kim tell me about the planet."

Looking like he was standing at attention while still sitting in his
chair, the ensign referred to the PADD in his hand.

"According to my scans Captain, the planet is marginally M class.
It's bombarded by abnormal amounts of ionizing radiation both
cosmically by its sun and terrestrially by its core."

"Does life survive there?" She queried.

"Yes there is animal as well as humanoid inhabitants. Their
technology level is at par with late 18th century earth."

Damn there were natives.  The Prime Directive forbade contact with
any indigenous species that didn't have warp speed capacity.

"Will the radiation prevent us from beaming up a sample Mr Kim?"

The doctor interjected before the ensign could answer.

"You can't use the transporters Captain, it may effect the molecular
integrity of the mineral. I'll have to go down there and collect a
sample personally."

"Out of the question Doctor we need you here."

"Fine then send someone else but please Captain, don't beam it

Acknowledging that she had already acquiesced to this mission, she
considered her options. They didn't have time to send team down to
the planet, wait for them to find a deposit, harvest it and make the
meeting.  They could however send the Delta Flyer down and rendezvous
with it later. As if reading her mind, Lieutenant Paris spoke.

"I could go in the Flyer Captain and then follow you when I'm done.
No problem."  He sat back in chair smiling.

She smiled and knew that anything would be no problem for Tom if it
meant getting back into the cockpit of his precious Flyer.

"Fine but we'll come back for you. This planet may not have warp
technology but others in this system do and I won't have you out
there alone and unprotected."

Tom hid his disappointment fairly well but not well enough for her
not to notice it.  Sailing through unknown space would have thrilled
him but it would have made her nervous.  Kathryn couldn't risk losing
another shuttlecraft let alone a chief pilot.

"I volunteer as well Captain."


Her stoic and normally "Tom" allergic first officer compelled her

"Voyager will be gone for approximately two weeks and the Lieutenant
shouldn't be left alone for that long."

"Afraid I might get into trouble Commander?"

Kathryn saw the smirk that accompanied the blond's comment and knew
he wasn't really offended by Chakotay. As usual, he was just baiting
the commander and as usual the first officer took the bait.

"That's not what I meant Lieutenant." He leaned forward to look the
mischievous pilot in the eye. "I meant it wouldn't be safe
for 'anyone' to be left alone on an unfamiliar planet.  What if you
were injured?"

"So you want to be there to take care of me just in case?"

Kathryn saw he wasn't even trying now to hide his amusement and when
she looked at the commander struggling for a rejoinder, she found it
hard not to smile herself. Saving him further embarrassment she put
an end to the exchange.

"Then it's settled."  She rose from her chair at the head of the
table. "Be ready to leave within the hour."

Before the room emptied the EMH added, "I'll want to see you both in
Sickbay before you leave for hyronalin inoculations.  The natives may
be able to survive the planet's radiation level but you won't."

The captain watched her officers leave the conference room and she
thought about the truth in the EMH's comment about their knack for
finding danger. Voyager did have a special talent for attracting
trouble but difficulties were inevitable sometimes when traveling
through uncharted space.

Kathryn just hoped that this wouldn't be one of those times.


What the hell was he doing here?

Chakotay moved down the grassy slope to the overgrown ruins at its
base.  Small brown furry mammals disturbed by his footfalls,
scattered before him making waves in the tall sedge.  Finding a low
moss covered wall, he made himself comfortable.

It wasn't that he regretted his decision to volunteer. He found the
flora and fauna, so like Earth's North American deserts, fascinating
and the ruins appealed to his love of archeology.  What he didn't
understand were his motives for being here in the first place. Well
that wasn't totally true; he did have some inkling.

He was here because Tom was and he had been unable to resist the
thought of spending two weeks alone with the dazzling blond pilot.

It was foolish and it was folly.  He knew years ago that the Tom
didn't return his feelings, the Jonas incident had shown him that.
Tom had deceived him with ease and betrayed his trust.  It didn't
matter that it was for the good of the ship.  If their positions had
been reversed, Chakotay would have been unable to follow through with
the plan because his love for the pilot would have made hurting him
inconceivable. Unfortunately Tom didn't have the same compunction and
thus had shown the commander his feelings were one sided. It had been
a hard realization but he'd gotten over it by shoving his desire to a
dark recess in his heart and avoiding the pilot whenever possible.

So what the hell was he doing now?  Nothing in these last years had
shown him that Tom's feelings had changed.  The lieutenant pursued
many relationships, B'Elanna being his latest, but he had never
showed an interest in him. Did he think two weeks alone could change
all that? And if it could, could he or Tom be able to betray B'Elanna
that way?

Shelving his dilemma for the time being, the commander brought out
the Doc's holographic camera to get some candid shots of the vine
covered stone arches that populated the area.


Where the fuck was Chakotay?

Tom threw the spade across the span of the arroyos and sat at the
edge of the meter deep pit he spent the last two hours digging.

Because of the Prime fucking Directive they were unable to set down
by any above ground deposits of potassium iodide.  The crystal
flourished along side water holes but unfortunately so did the
natives of this world.  So that left them to harvesting the element
from an underground watershed at the base of a mountain range.

Tom watched as small lizard like creatures sunned themselves on the
rocks in the dry creek bed.  Maybe radiated was a better word.  It
wasn't overly warm here but the radio-ionic environment did mimic the
conditions of a rocky desert.

Water was scarce and the vegetation was mainly cactus like succulents
and thorny bushes designed to make the most of the harsh habitat.  In
the few days they'd been here he'd seen sheep like animals designed
to cope with the uneven terrain and at night he heard the cries of
predators that fed on them.

Heaving himself up from the edge of the hole, Tom retrieved a small
device from the pocket of his trousers.  He pressed a button and
dissolved the holo front of the cave where the Flyer rested. It was
his third break in less than an hour but he didn't care.  It wasn't
like the commander was here to stop him.  No the commander had
detected something 'old' over the next rise and had abandoned him two
hours ago.  He retrieved a water bottle from the shuttle, reactivated
the screen and flopped down in the dried grasses near the cave

What the hell was the first officer doing anyway?  Tom knew he was OK
because the commander commed him every half-hour but was so fucking
great about a bunch of rocks anyway.  Was he that boring that
Chakotay found a pile of inanimate objects more interesting?

So much for getting to know the guy better.  Tom was a people person
and at some level he was able to make a connection of some kind with
everyone on Voyager.  The commander had been the only exception and
he'd hoped this trip would remedy that. He flipped the top of the
water bottle and took a sip.

The commander's emotional distance had plagued him for years.  It had
started with Jonas and if he knew then what he knew now, he would
have never agreed to the captain's plan.  Tom still remembered the
look of hurt in Chakotay's eyes when he realized he'd been duped.  No
amount of explanation had been able to remove that pain and to this
day Tom still saw traces of it.

He done everything from teasing the commander to just plain old
pissing him off to get his attention but the man still avoided him.
Hell he even approached B'Elanna looking for insights on the first
officer and a possible way to resolve the animosity between them. It
had been while questioning the engineer he had been unwittingly been
drawn into a turbulent relationship with her that she now resisted
his efforts to end.

It might have been worth it if he'd found a way to become Chakotay's
friend through her but she guarded her association with the commander
closely and refused to share it with him. Fuck!

So here he was in an alien prairie running from one person and
chasing another.

Man it sucked to be him.


Chakotay slowly pulled his phaser from the loop in his belt and
followed the line of the rough-hewn wall.

He'd been taking pictures of the wildflowers growing between the
cracks in the ancient plaza when he heard the sound.  Using his tri-
corder he'd scanned the area but the resident radiation had skewed
the readings telling him only that whatever it was, it was big and
that there were two of them.

Reaching the end of the wall, the commander crouched low and made his
body flush with the fortification.  Taking a few deep breaths he
quickly turned the corner with his with arm outstretched and his
phaser ready.

"No!" A high pitched voice wailed.

Chakotay quickly pulled his arm up, using his other hand to steady it.

"Please we have nothing left but our lives!"

Sheltering another form behind her was a terrified young woman.  Her
hair was chestnut and her complexion was a dusky shade similar to
his. The commander holstered his weapon and extended his arms with
his palms facing skyward.

"I promise I won't hurt you."

"You're not a Roke?"

Thankful of the universal translator, the commander tried to soothe
her with his voice.

"No. My name is Chakotay. What's yours?"

She stood but didn't answer him right away.  Starting at his boots,
she let her eyes linger up his frame, over his uniform and back to
his face. She studied it a few moments before answering him.  This
time her words were quiet and controlled.

"No you're not a Roke. My name is Kian." She turned and lowered
herself to her knees to the man propped up on the wall behind
her. "And this is Rad." Her fingers brushed the unconscious man's

Chakotay squatted beside Kian and checked Rad's wrist for a pulse. He
found a weak one but not knowing this species' physiology, he didn't
know if that was normal but using Kian as a visual marker he guessed
it wasn't. Rad was paler and more delicate than Kian.  He also lacked
her long dark mane and was completely bald.

"Can you help him?"  Dark orbs ringed with tears stared at the
commander causing his heart to tighten.

Could he?  The Star Fleet's General Order Number One said no.  The
rules stated he was unable to make full disclosure of his identity or
interfere with a planet's social development. They were good rules
and he believed in them but could helping one man change the
evolution of an entire world? A small dark hand placed itself in his
and he came to a decision.

"I'll try."


"Are you out of your fucking mind?!"

"Lower your voice and remember who's in charge here."  Chakotay
pulled him behind a large boulder out of earshot of their visitors.

"OK. Are you out of your fucking mind 'Commander'?"

"No he needs medical aid and you, Lieutenant, are going to give it to

Tom had almost freaked when he saw Chakotay returning with the two
natives.  It was about all he could do to move the scanners and tri-
corders out of sight before their primitive visitors saw them. He
been quite proud of his efforts and couldn't believe that Chakotay
wanted him to pull them all back out to heal the wounded young man.

"What about a little thing called the Prime Directive?"

Great I finally got his attention Tom thought with chagrin as the
commander stood toe to toe with him. He felt Chakotay's breath on his
face as he spoke.

"What about a little thing called compassion. Helping this man isn't
going to start any wars or revolutions." Tom felt the commander's
hands grasp his biceps. "But it will make one frightened young woman
very happy."

With the commander all in his face, Tom was having hard time coming
up with a rebuttal, so he gave in.

"OK I'll scan him and if he's not too damaged, I'll heal him."
Trying to regain some of his personal space Tom pressed his chest
forward but Chakotay didn't budge or let go of his arms. "You'll have
to distract the girl while I do it so she doesn't see the med-kit."


Chakotay smiled and Tom watched in fascination as dimples formed on
the lower part of the commander's cheeks. Funny, he'd never noticed
them before.  Chakotay's gentle voice interrupted his examination. He
looked up into black irises ringed in ebony.

"We should go now Tom."


Chakotay still held his biceps keeping his face near enough for Tom
to kiss.  Kiss?  Now where the hell did that come from?  Startled by
his own thoughts, Tom brought his hands up flat with Chakotay's chest
and pushed.  The commander released him and stumbled back.

Feeling like an idiot, Tom brushed past the first officer to retrieve
his med-kit from the bushes.


Foolishness and folly.

His own words came back to haunt him as he watched Tom make Kian
comfortable by the fire with Rad's sleeping head in her lap. With
effort he tore his eyes from the blond's lithe form to stare at the

Spirits, if Tom hadn't pushed him back when he did, Chakotay would
have taken that sweet mouth with his and kissed it. He wasn't sure
what it been that made him forget himself.  Maybe it was holding the
elusive pilot in his arms for the first time or maybe it was the look
of wonder on Tom's face.  Well whatever it was he'd have to be extra
careful not to let it effect him again in the future.  He didn't
relish the thought of being court-martialed on sexual harassment
charges. Chakotay did a mental shake and focused his mind on their
current situation.

The lieutenant had been true to his word. He'd healed Rad's brain
injury and in the process had found something interesting. Rad was
dying of radiation exposure.

The young man's thyroid was so weakened it was unable to absorb the
ionizing radiation that caused cell mutations. Tom had detected
nascent malignancies in most of his major organs and predicted he
wouldn't live another five years without treatment.  The interesting
part was that Tom had also scanned Kian finding that she had minimal
damage to her thyroid and was free from any cancers.

How could two people from the same species have such different
reactions to their world's environment?  The only answer Chakotay
could come with was the one of them was not from this world but which

Kian's tolerance to the effects of the resident radiation could be
due to years of generational adaptation and Rad's failure to do so
could be because he was alien to this planet. Then again like he and
Tom, Kian could be inoculated and it could be normal for the
aboriginal peoples of this world to die young.

As the Doc would say it was a chemical mystery and it was one that
needed solving.  If there was someone else on this planet with the
similar warp and more importantly, weapon technology as they, he
wanted to know who they were and what they were up to.  His own
feeling aside, Chakotay had given Captain Janeway his word he would
keep the pilot safe and that's what he intended to do.

Tom finished tucking blankets around their guests and the commander
allowed himself to watch the play of the man's muscles under his
uniform as the pilot left the campsite. As he watched the retreating
form, desire, love and resolve hit him like a sledgehammer.

Chakotay would never let some alien with a hidden agenda take his Tom
away from him. He'd die first.


Life sucked.

After settling Kian and Rad by the fire, he'd slipped back to the
Flyer to retrieve two survival tent kits and was now in the process
of erecting them a few meters from the campsite. He had one up
already and was inside it unfurling the blankets for bedding.

It was obvious to him that Kian cared for Rad deeply.  The shitty
thing was that she was in love with a dead man.  OK he wasn't dead
yet but in few years he would be and she'd be left alone.  She
wouldn't even have the solace of a child for remembrance because
Tom's scans showed Rad was sterile and had probably had been from the
onset of puberty.

After making the bed to his satisfaction he pressed a button on the
floor of the tent activating a long cylindrical pillow. He backed out
of the shelter to start on the other one.

When he emerged, he looked over at the group around the fire.  Tears
came to his eyes as he saw Kian smoothing her fingers over Rad's
baldpate and singing softly to him as he slept.  He cut away to the
commander who sat silently on the other side of the campfire watching
them and Tom features hardened. He didn't seem touched by the
couple's love. The bastard was probably busy trying to figure out
which one of them had the ray gun.

In his frustration Tom hit the release of the second tent with his
boot spilling canvas and cotton over the desert floor in a bloom.  He
picked the tent out from the jumble and began erecting it all the
while mentally kicking himself in the backside.

Two hours ago he had wanted to kiss Chakotay.  Correction two hours
ago he didn't know what he wanted.  It had been while he was treating
Rad that he'd come to the conclusion that his new found fascination
with the commander's face was a sign of sexual attraction.  He'd
almost dropped the hypospray when he felt his groin harden at the
thought of placing his mouth on Chakotay's.

When he was done treating the young man, he'd run at warp speed to
the ruins where Chakotay had taken Kian hoping to see that smile
again. That's when reality reared her ugly head.

After scanning Kian covertly as she left to see Rad, he told Chakotay
about the young man's cancers and of Kian's immunity to them.  As he
watched the commander digest the information, arousal burned in his
veins.   That's when Chakotay dropped the ball.

The first officer starting spouting theories about alien invaders or
some such thing and completely missed the point.  Kian was going to
live and Rad was going to die.  Didn't that fucking matter to him?
Couldn't he feel that in his heart or was it cold as the rest of
him?  Tom had left the ruins in a silent fury.

The lieutenant tossed the blankets into the tent and then followed
them in.  It would be warm in here.  The thermal blankets along with
the coated skin of the tent would protect him and Chakotay from the
biting cold that arrived on this planet after dark.

Activating the pillow, Tom lay back against it and cursed the Prime
Directive once again.  Because of it he'd have to spend the night
here with the commander instead of in his single bunk on the Flyer.
As angry as he was, his cock still twitched in anticipation of lying
next to Chakotay. A sardonic laugh escaped his lips.

Man oh man, his life was fucked on so many levels it wasn't funny.
He had sex with a woman that he didn't want to be with but wanted him
so he could be with a man. Now he wanted to have sex with that same
man who wasn't capable of wanting him and he didn't want to be with.
His head spun and he tried to break it down further.

B'Elanna wanted him but he didn't want her.  He wanted Chakotay but
Chakotay couldn't want him, which was OK because he didn't really
want him to. Oh shit. He stifled another laugh.  That was about as
clear as tomato soup. Tom banged his head against the pillow in
frustration a few times before giving up and leaving the tent. He was
right the first time.

Life really did suck.


"Tom's a funny name for a healer."

"You think that's funny?  My middle name is Eugene."

Kian watched the curious man through the flames of the fire as he
laughed.  He was abnormally tall, well so was the other one but at
least Chakotay looked like one of her people.  This Tom however was
colour of light. Even his eyes, as kind as they were, differed. They
were as blue as the sky on a clear morning.

"Who are the Roke?"

It was Chakotay speaking.  He seemed to be the one with authority
here and she wasn't surprised.  In her tribe, a man with such size
and presence would be chief. Kian bowed to his power and answered him
with respect.

"The Roke are the exiles of my people the Mepae.  They travel in
bands and survive by attacking travelers."

"You exile your own kind?"

"For crimes against our community, yes."  With conviction she
continued. "We are not a cruel people, Chakotay. Banishment is
considered a last resort and if a Roke comes to us from the desert,
he is given nourishment for both his spirit and his body."

"And he is sent on his way again."


"And it was one of these bands that attacked you and Rad."  It was a
statement of fact not a question.  "Were you part of group?"

"No we were alone and I know it was dangerous but it was necessary."

"Why? Where were you going?"

She didn't have to tell him the truth.  Kian suspected that Chakotay
would accept whatever tale she chose to tell. However after the
kindness both he and Tom had shown, she was loath to repay him with

She leaned down and kissed Rad's smooth forehead before telling her


"I know Rad's dying."

Her admission surprised Chakotay. Kian stroked the man in her arms
cheek and spoke softly.

"All of his people are.  They live in the mountains in the north and
are called the Anu.  Old tales say that many years ago they were of
our tribe but became dissatisfied with our laws and religion and
created their own community among the peaks."

"Why are they dying?"

"My father says it's because they have turned away from the light and
are being punished by the spirits."

"Punished how?"  This time it was the healer asking the question.
Kian gazed into his blue eyes.

"The Anu have half our life spans and children are a rarity.  They
have only their books and machines to worship and are denied Ki."


"Yes it doesn't grow in the mountains and when they come to our
villages for trade, our priests refuse share the sacred rock with

Kian caught the look that passed between the two men across from
her.  Grasping the leather thong from around her neck, she pulled her
talisman out from its place beneath her tunic.  She held up the
yellow crystal with indigo striations to a pair of startled eyes.

"Ki.  It permeates all aspects of our lives.  Food is seasoned with
its powder and our priests use it for rituals and healing. Do they
not have it where you come from?"

Thomas Eugene cocked a golden eyebrow at Chakotay who frowned at him
in answer. Kian was trying to figure out the odd relationship between
the two when Chakotay spoke.

"We have something similar in our tribe but it's available to all.
Do the Roke have access to Ki?"

"Yes from the priests when they visit and from small deposits
scattered across the wastelands.  The Roke use it for their food but
not for ritual.  They trade their excess to the few Anu who practice
our religion in secret."

"Anu like Rad?"

"No Rad is what he calls a scientist like his father." Kian touched
her love's lips tenderly with the tips of her fingers.  "He came to
our community with a trading party two weeks ago asking to speak with
my father."

"Your father is a priest isn't he?" Blue eyes flashed. "Rad or his
father figured out that the Anu needed the medicinal properties the
Ki offered and wanted a sample to analyze."

Kian was dumfounded at his vision.  What mystical place produced a
healer like Tom and a chieftain like Chakotay?  The ancient texts
that lined the walls of her father's tent made no mentioned of any
other tribes other than the Mepae and the Anu. They weren't spirits,
they were of flesh and blood like her but maybe the spirits had sent
them to help her.  It was a crazy thought but Kian saw no other

"Kian are you all right?"  She nodded to Chakotay and found her voice.

"My father granted Rad an audience but rejected his theory and
refused him the Ki."

Understanding shone from the healer's eyes. "But you were there too
and you believed him."

"Yes and I had many questions. Rad stayed after his group left to
explain it all to me and together we tried to convince my father.  We
were unsuccessful."

"Is that when he asked you to leave with him?"

"No that was when I offered him my talisman for his research but he
wouldn't take it." She lowered her eyelashes. "So I made him another

"You offered him your heart."  Tom said the words so quietly she
almost didn't hear them.

"Yes and he offered me his. We left during the night taking supplies
and two of my father's horses. On foot the journey would take five
days but with the animals it would only be two or three before we
reached the mountain city."

"How long had you been gone when the Roke attacked you?"  Kian had no
trouble hearing the chieftain's firm voice.

"A day.  Rad fought them and was injured.  We took refuge in the
ruins and that's when he collapsed.  You found us a few hours later."

It felt good telling someone her story but it was also tiring.  Her
head started to droop and her eyes became heavy.  She was almost
asleep where she sat when she was startled awake by a clap of hands.

"OK Bedtime!"

"Tom I think we should talk about what to do."

"Fine Chakotay, you can sit here and talk but the rest of us are
going to sleep."

The healer crossed to her side of the fire and lifted Rad from her
arms. As Kian followed Tom to one of the tents near by, she wondered
again about the hierarchy of his clan. The only one in her tribe that
spoke to her chief that way was his wife. Kian remembered the silent
exchanges they shared and understanding hit her foggy brain.  Now
things made a little more sense.

Tom and Chakotay were mated.


One and a half meters.

Tom stood outside of the tent with his arms outstretched measuring
its width.  Chakotay was already inside taking up his half of the
space.  Would he be still wearing his uniform or will he have
stripped down to his skivvies?  Tom hoped and dreaded the latter.

"Are you coming in here or not?"

Oh fuck the commander knew he was standing out here like an idiot.
The pilot covered his embarrassment with sarcasm.

"Why do you want me to come?"  The answering silence told Tom that
Chakotay had caught the double entendre.

Feeling as nervous as a Bajoran in a room full of Cardassians, Tom
bent forward and entered the tent.  The light from the fire outside
illuminated the interior subtly and he was able to see.

Chakotay lay on his stomach, sans uniform, with his head resting in
arms like a nest.  His face was turned towards the wall of the tent
so Tom was unable to see his eyes but he could see the rest of him
quite well.

Thanks to the technology of the day, the thermal blankets were thin
and molded themselves nicely to the commander's broad back and firm
ass. Tom averted his eyes before he became too aroused and began to
remove his uniform. When he got down to his boxers, he climbed under
the covers to lie on his back beside Chakotay.

Tom stared at the roof of the tent and wrapped his arms tightly
around his torso to prevent his hands from finding his pulsing
erection.  Chakotay shifted, moving the blankets across his cock
creating a sweet friction.  A moan escaped his lips before he could
stop it.


Please don't look, please don't look Tom chanted to himself knowing
that his erection would be clearly defined by the covers.

"What?" He said in a whisper.

The commander moved again and Tom knew without looking that Chakotay
was now on his side regarding him. He kept his gaze straight ahead
and waited for the first officer to do something, anything.

"Do you want to come?"  The voice was low and gentle.

"Yes." He hissed between his teeth.

"Do you want me to help you?"

Squeezing his eyes shut, Tom nodded his head in assent.  If he
couldn't get the thoughtful lover he'd settle for the concerned
commander. It didn't matter which role Chakotay chose to play; Tom
was so horny he'd accept anything if the first officer would only
touch him.

"Take off your shorts Tom."

He released his death grip on his middle and hooked his thumbs in the
waistband of his boxers.  Lifting his ass, he slid them down to
ankles and kicked them off with his feet.  When he was done, Tom lay
still with his arms glued to his sides and waited.

As his mind registered that the commander had moved closer, he felt a
broad palm rest on his abdomen.  The fingers were spreading out like
fan and closing again. Slowly the hand edged closer to the base of
his stomach and Tom sucked in his breath. He felt a gentle caress
along the shaft of his penis.

"Oh please."

Chakotay answered his plea and began moving his hand in long measured
strokes.  It felt so delicious that Tom moaned aloud and lifted his
butt in time with the commander's movements. As his orgasm neared the
pilot brought his arms up and folded them over his eyes.

"Come for me baby."  Chakotay's mouth was by his ear and it was the
closeness of the commander's lips that sent him over the edge.

Snaking his own hand under the covers, Tom placed it over Chakotay's
and climaxed.  The release was incredible and it made him wish they
could do all over again.  He threaded his fingers through the first
officer's holding them to him, as he caught his breath.


Chakotay's voice brought him back from the unconsciousness he'd been
drifting towards.  Not sure of the proper response to give your
superior officer after he jacks you off, Tom just nodded.  The
commander reclaimed his hand and replaced it with something soft.
After gently cleaning him, Tom felt the big man roll back to his side
of the tent.

"Good night Lieutenant."

Opening his eyes for the first time since the experience started, Tom
chanced a look at the commander.  He was back in his original
position facing the canvas wall breathing evenly.  Stifling an urge
to brush his fingers over that strong back, he turned over and tried
to sleep.

As Tom fell into slumber he thought he heard a wolf howl somewhere in
the night.


She'd been right.

After settling Rad comfortably on her breast she'd heard the
unmistakable sounds of lovemaking coming from the next tent.  Kian
wasn't sure how it was accomplished with two men but from the sound
of the moaning it seemed it must be pleasurable for them.

Finishing her morning absolutions she walked back to the campsite
where Rad was chatting with the healer.  He didn't look particularly
well but he was awake and that filled her heart with joy. Tom had
said that Rad would recover entirely from the attack but it would
take time.  Unfortunately they didn't have time.  Her father would be
looking for her and if he found her he'd take her back home.

Kian bypassed the two men to look for the 'commander' as Tom called
him.  If Chakotay really were sent by the spirits, he'd help her and
give her supplies.  She laughed at the irony of the situation.
Unlike her, Father would have no trouble believing that Tom and
Chakotay came from the spirit world.  He would however have a hard
time believing that they were here to help the infidels as he called
them.  Kian found the new worn path and followed it to the ruins.

Careful of her footing as she descended the sedge covered slope she
saw Chakotay sitting crossed legged in the middle of the plaza.  His
eyes were close and his hands rested on his knees.  Kian knew what he
was doing because she'd seen her father do it a thousand times.  The
chieftain was talking to the spirit world. Any doubts she'd had about
his origin dissipated, as she perceived the serene look of grace on
Chakotay's face. She backed away quietly fearful of disturbing his


She stopped her retreat and walked over to him to accept her
punishment.  Kian fell to her knees.

"Forgive me great chief.  It was not my intention to interrupt."

Chakotay smiled and for first time she noticed his beauty. With Tom
it had been easy.  His grace and golden hair took one's breath away
immediately but with the commander it was subtler. His allure was
different. Tom's aura could ignite your senses but Chakotay's had the
ability to ignite your soul.

"It's all right Kian.  I was done anyway."  He urged her to sit
comfortably with his hands.  She acceded and mirrored his
position.  "What is it?"

"Rad and I have to leave."

"Now?  Tom says Rad isn't well enough to travel yet, especially not
on foot."  His voice became solemn.  "And what about the Roke?"

"I know but we have no choice.  If my father finds me, he will
prevent me from taking the Ki to Rad's father for study."

The big man stood and ran a hand through his dark spiky hair.  Kian
remained where she was as she watched the chieftain wrestle with his

"How long will it take?"

"Three maybe four days."

"And once you're there you'll be safe?"

She nodded. "Rad assures me that his that his father will welcome me
into their home."

Chakotay held his hand out to her and pulled her to her feet.  He
continued to hold her hand as he spoke.

"I can escort you to the city but only if you don't reveal my help to
anyone."  He took her chin between two fingers. "Not to anyone, not
Rad's father and certainly not your own, understand?"

Silence would be a small price to pay for help from the gods.

"Yes I understand and I will forfeit my life to you if I break my

The smile returned.  "Well thank you for the offer but your silence
will do. OK?"

"OK."  She responded, hoping she used the odd colloquial properly.

He released her face and steered her in the direction of the camp.

"Now let's go see if we can talk Paris into going with us."

Paris?  Kian followed his lead and wondered if this "Paris" was 'his'


"Captain Janeway will kill us."

"Only if she knows."

Damn he was sexy when he went Maquis.  Tom wondered if the commander
would be terribly offend if he asked him to screw him in the shade of
this big assed boulder they were hiding behind. The blond pilot
sighed. If the man's business as usual attitude this morning was any
indication, he just might be.  Tom put his libido on hold and focused
on the commander's latest infraction of the Prime Directive.

"So what the hell are we supposed to tell her we've been doing for
the last ten days, getting a tan?" Tom inched closer to the
commander.  "And what about the potassium iodide? We haven't even
harvested any yet."

Chakotay ignored his attitude. "We'll tell her we were studying the
flora and fauna and it will be the truth.  We just don't have to say
we did it while at the same time as traveling along the base of the
mountain range. As for the Ki, we should have plenty of time to
harvest it when we return."

OK that was doable.  Tom was never good at reports anyway and if a
small fact, such as they were helping a priest's daughter and her
lover make medical history, failed to make into his logs, well it
wouldn't be the first time he'd left out an important detail. Besides
he couldn't say no to the commander when turned on his renegade charm.

"I'm in but it's your ass that catches the heat if were caught, OK
Commander?" He poked the commander in the chest for emphasis.

"OK Lieutenant."

Chakotay grabbed his hand and Tom lost his breath.  He'd wanted all
morning to have the big man touch him and now that he was, it was
electrifying.  Tom tilted his head and leaned in for a kiss.  When he
was centimeters from his goal, the first officer released his hand
like it was on fire and took a step backward.

"We better get ready. You secure the Flyer, grab some supplies and
I'll pack up the tents." Not waiting for him to answer, Chakotay took
off in the direction of the campsite.

OK now it was personal.  Tom realigned his goals from wanting to
avoid the man because of his cold heart to doing his damnedest to
melt it.

He headed towards the cave and the Delta Flyer and told himself as he
walked that his goals weren't unreachable or too high. Chakotay
didn't have to declare his undying love or anything like that. That's
not what he wanted from the man. No he really only wanted one thing
from the first officer now.

A kiss.


He'd wanted to kiss Tom Paris and he was fairly sure Tom Paris had
wanted to kiss him, so why did he run away?

Chakotay lay back on the thermal blankets in the tent he was supposed
to be packing up and raked his fingers through his hair.

Well first off they hadn't talked about what last night had meant.
It had been a dream come true for him to be able to satisfy the man
he loved sexually but it had also been a nightmare.  Chakotay had
been terrified of touching him any more than he did and thus
revealing the entirety of his feelings for the young man.

What would Tom have done if he'd begun to whisper words of love into
his ear?  If it was only sex for the lieutenant, which it very likely
was, the pilot would have probably socked him the jaw or made some
sarcastic remark.  Both would have crushed his heart and destroyed
the tentative friendship that had taken them years to develop.

Fine said a voice inside him.  Then don't say anything at all and
just take what's being offered to you.  Chakotay considered that.
He'd likely get hurt in the long run but could he possibly hurt
anymore than he was now?  Probably but he'd have better memories in

Then there was B'Elanna.  He'd already betrayed her trust by touching
her lover last night. If she found out B'Elanna would scream and beat
the crap out of him but she'd get over it and move on.

So it was decided. There would be no more running away and no more
false excuses.  Tonight if the blond was willing, Chakotay would
touch him, kiss him and even fuck him.

Tom didn't have to know that what he was really doing was making love.