Title: Holodiction P5
Author: Cheryl Forbes
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Pairing: Chakotay/Tom Paris
Rating: NC 17
Series: 5 of ?
Email for feedback:
Disclaimer: Voyager and her crew are the property of Paramount and
not me. Whatever.

Summary: Tom's pregnancy becomes public knowledge.

"He's still the same."

Kathryn watched as the pilot smoothed his hand over "Commander's"
yellow coat and sang softly to him. He was sitting in the easy
chair with the puppy sleeping in his lap this time instead of
sprawled on the rug before the hearth but it still melted her heart.
The scene was picture perfect.

"Yes I programmed him that way to keep him cuddly. My babies don't
grow Tom."

"Mine does." He said quietly as he looked up from the slumbering pup
to her.

"Your what?"

By the steady gaze from his blue eyes, Kathryn guessed she was about
to find out the reason he asked for this meeting.

"My baby. It grows everyday."

"What baby Tom? A programmed one?"

"No. The one I'm carrying."

For a moment she'd thought he was here to ask her for access to the
DIF for some new hologram he'd created and found herself wishing he
was. It would be a whole lot easier for her brain to process than
the alternative.

"Are you telling me you're pregnant Tom?"

"Almost four months. I thought I'd better tell you before I started
showing too much more." The pilot laughed lightly. "Fuck I've
already had to alter my uniform once."

Oh my god he was serious. Automatically her eyes went to his
stomach, which the puppy partially hid. Except for a slight bulge
there wasn't much to see, yet. Her throat constricted.

"How?" The word was barely a whisper but he heard her anyway,
probably more from anticipation than volume.

"Well you take one fake egg, add one part me, one part somebody else
and shake. It was the Doc and Seven's recipe. I was just the pan
they made it in."

"You did this on purpose? Why?"

"Lots of reasons I guess and most of them stupid but it doesn't
matter now. I want this baby more than I thought I ever could." Tom
placed the puppy on the rug and looked at her with earnest. "It's
the most important thing in my life Kathryn."

Unlike before his use of her first name didn't faze her, not compared
to the rest of what he said or how he looked as he said it.

She had mistaken his ethereal glow as an effect of the fire burning
in the grate when she'd first walked on to the holodeck. Looking at
him again she could now see it wasn't dance of the flames that made
him radiant but the life growing within him. Tom was achingly
beautiful in his new form but he wasn't the only one responsible for

"If I asked who the 'somebody' was that helped you make this miracle,
would you tell me?"

His light dimmed slightly. "No, it's not important."

Tom unable to hold her inquisitive gaze, moved his eyes to the puppy
on the floor and without meaning to, answered her question.

"But he knows. He'd have to for the procedure to be performed. You
would need a sample of his ah.ah.-"

"Semen and no he doesn't know. I obtained the sample by an alternate

"After sex? My god Tom do you know how wrong that is?"

"No more wrong than a women going off birth control when she finds a
man she wants to conceive with. It's done all the time Kathryn."

"Not on my ship it doesn't."

"Yeah well there's a first time for everything besides he's never
going find out. I intend to let people think it was my sperm that
was the catalyst and that the DNA was an anonymous donation."

"You can't do this to him. You can't deny him his child."

By this time they both knew who this mysterious 'him' was they were
talking about.

"You can't deny something that's not wanted."

"He'll want both of you if you tell him Tom."

"Yeah but for all the wrong reasons. I don't want him with me just
because his duty demands it and it will. He's pretty fucked up when
it comes to doing what he thinks is expected of him. We can't be
together until he's able to get past that."

"And if he can't?"

"Then I'll probably hurt for the rest of my life but I'll sleep
easier knowing I didn't settle for the next best thing. I know
it'll be hard but I'd rather be without him and raise our baby alone
than have him resent his obligation to me."

"If you felt this way why did you get pregnant?"

"Because it makes me into something I could never be otherwise."

"Like what?"

"One of the good guys Kathryn," He got up from the chair and held his
belly tenderly.

"We're one of the good guys now."


It was his serve he thought as he strode with purpose to his

For the better part of the last year, he and Tom had been volleying
their love back and forth and it was his turn to lob the ball over
their emotional net. Only this time it hadn't been so easy to get
the pilot to join in nor had Chakotay been the only one who wanted to

Since his pregnancy had been announced, Tom had been bombarded with a
plethora of pleas for his company and more than a few marriage
proposals. It hadn't been the amount of the offers that were
unusual, Tom had always been popular, but the nature of them.

Crewmen that had not looked twice at the irresponsible pilot previous
to his delicate condition were now clamoring for his presence.
Spirits, he had even heard that Gerron Tem had gotten down on one
knee for the expanding pilot.

He supposed the reason for the fervor was what Tom now represented.
He was life and hope for them now. The child that grew within him
was the first conceived aboard a ship that hadn't seen a birth since
Naomi's. Everyone wanted to be a part of this new Delta quadrant
baby's life and by extension Tom's. He couldn't blame them. Chakotay
wanted that as much as anybody the only difference between him and
them was that he had a right. The child was his.

From the moment he'd heard the news, he'd known the baby the pilot
carried belonged to him. He wasn't sure how the irascible blond had
managed it but there had never been a doubt in his mind that he was
the father. He knew so on instinct alone because of course Tom had
denied it.

An anonymous donor my ass. Chakotay knew he was the greatest man in
Tom's life and the only one the pilot would allow to father his
child. The young blond may not like him very much right now but he
definitely loved him and not in the superficial way he'd first

Chakotay had seen the fire in those blue eyes burn for him that night
in Sandrine's. Their flames were bright and true and unlike any he'd
seen before. They were eternal. When he'd heard about the baby, he'd
also known they were sincere and that made the difference.

It had been almost a month ago when he'd confronted Tom about the
baby and given his oath to stand with him. He'd been surprised, no
he'd been down right shocked when the pilot had refused his offer and
denied his parentage.

Until today he had stepped back from the pilot and resorted to late
night visits to Sickbay to see holographic displays of the child's
progress. He'd sit for hours in the medical facility fascinated by
his baby's small hands and tiny near transparent body. Lacking the
medical expertise and the doctor's council, he was unable to tell if
it was a son or daughter he'd fallen in love with. Not that it

Reaching the door he wanted, Chakotay hit the chime and waited
nervously. After a few moments the panels swished opened.


It was Friday night and he had a date.

After pushing his jeans down under his extended abdomen to get them
on, he reached for the silk shirt hanging in his closet. Its
brilliant blue shade would accentuate the colour of his eyes and the
delicate fabric the shape of his belly. He didn't for one moment
want Chakotay to forget his condition during his visit.

Donning the shirt, he walked barefoot over to the full-length mirror
to the left of his bedroom door.

Not too bad Paris, not too bad at all. Except for the watermelon
slung low on his hips he looked pretty good for a man in his second
trimester. Tom turned around, lifted the tail of his shirt and
peered down at his denim-clad ass. Oooh nice, tight and touchable.
Chakotay was definitely going to want to fuck it raw. That is of
course, if Tom decided to let him. This was only their first date
after all.

After a month of letting the big guy sweat, he had invited him to
play chess tonight in his quarters with the understanding that the
only piece he was going to get this evening was marble and sitting on
an inlaid ivory board. The commander had agreed in an instant. He
had also agreed not to talk about the baby's father.

Like a bad holo-vid, Chakotay had insisted the child was his and
subsequently proposed as soon as he'd heard he was pregnant. Tom had
been this close to affirming the first officer's suspicions and
accepting his offer of marriage. Common sense had prevented him from
making a complete idiot of himself and appearing as desperate as he

Chakotay needed to see where he was leaping before he jumped whole
hog off a cliff he couldn't climb back up from. OK so it was a
stupid analogy but that didn't make it any less true. The commander
needed time to consider what he was offering. So Tom waited once
again for the big man.

It was only when he'd heard from the Doc that someone had accessed
his medical files and neonatal images that he'd relented. Only Chak
had that kind of authority and interest. The door chime rang.

After tripping and nearly falling over the clutter of clothing strewn
about his bedroom floor, Tom ran for the door. Reaching it, he took
a deep breath, tousled his hair with his left hand and put on his
most devil may care smile.


The doors opened to a vision in black cashmere and denim.


Oh spirits he was beautiful in blue.

Chakotay laughed to himself. Tom could have been wearing a warp coil
and he would have still thought the blond was the most incredible
thing in the universe.

"Would you like something to drink?"

"Tea." Tom nodded and headed for the replicator. "No wait."


"Scotch. I'll have a scotch, neat."


Giving him an indulgent smile, the pilot resumed his course.

Tom returned with his drink and leaned casually against the edge of
the dining room table.

"Anything else?"

Taking a sip of the golden liquid more for courage than for taste, he
didn't really like scotch, he voiced the request that had been
burning a hole in his head all day.

"There is something."

Reaching around him, Chakotay put the glass on the table. He
breathed deeply the blond's clean smell as his face passed the
slender neck. Tom shuddered.

"Think chess, Chak, not sex."

"That's not what I want or rather not what I was going to ask

"No?" Came the shocked reply. "What then?"

Still standing close, he gathered his nerve and asked.

"I'd like to, if you'd let me, touch your stomach."

Tom thought a moment, his white teeth worrying his bottom lip and
then motioned with his head yes.

Slowly, as if approaching a wounded animal, Chakotay came around to
the young man's side and pressed his chest into Tom's shoulder.
Looking to his blue eyes for final confirmation, he cupped his hand
over the silk covered mound.

Feeling Tom's heated skin beneath the cool fabric for the first time
in months caused an automatic reaction in his nether regions he tried
to ignore.

"Is it moving yet?"

"A little. It feels like butterflies fluttering. Here wait."

Tom removed his hand and carefully unbuttoned the front of his
shirt. Another time when he'd been a bit more reckless in opening
the blue garment entered Chakotay's mind unbidden.

"Now try."

Starting with the golden hairs on his chest, Chakotay followed their
trail downwards. Just below the pilot's ribcage was the gentle swell
of their child. Oh spirits this was definitely the most beautiful
thing he'd ever seen Tom wear. He returned his hand and waited to
feel the butterflies.

"I think he's asleep." The pilot said apologetically after a few
minutes of nothing.

He was about to comment that's Okay he had time, when the pilot's
words sank in.

"It's a he?" He stroked Tom's belly in a circular motion.

"Yeah." Tom leaned into him and closed his eyes. "That feels nice."

"We're having a son." He said in awe and stilled his hand.

"Don't stop Chak." Tom caught his wrist and urged him to resume his

When he began to move again, the blond let go of his wrist and
threaded his long fingers into his dark blunter ones directing the
movement. Chakotay pressed his lips into the sweet spot below his
ear, rubbed his nose into the golden hair and let him. In varying
degrees of pressure Tom moved his palm over his stomach, around his
bellybutton in loose arcs and then up the middle to his chest.

With his free arm, he reached around the purring blond to hold his
waist and grated his arousal into his hip. Tom pushed back and
kneaded his hand into a hardened nipple.

"Oh fuck baby." The pilot moaned.

"I'd like to sweetness." Chakotay whispered into his ear.

Opening his now over bright eyes, Tom turned to look at him.

"I wanted to go slowly. I don't want to fuck this up Chak."

With a reassuring hand, he stroked the small of the pilot's back.

"We are going slowly. We haven't made love in months."

"It has been a long time hasn't it?" Tom conceded.

"Yes but if you want to wait, we can."

"I don't think I can. You may not be able to see it for baby, but
somewhere under my gut, my dick's hard and ready for you."

"Then let's go into the other room so you can take me."

"Take you? I wasn't thinking about that."

"Well it's time to stop thinking."

Tom laughed and pulled him close.

"Oh don't worry, I haven't done 'that' for months."


They lay naked face to face on the bed, kissing softly and exploring
each other's bodies. It was funny Tom thought. This was more erotic
and sensuous than the wild monkey sex they'd had before. It was
deeper and felt more right, more real.

"Are you sure about this Chak?" He said between kisses.

Chakotay's broad hands cupped his ass and pulled the gentle swell of
his stomach up under his ribcage. It was a perfect fit.

"It's what I wanted the first time we were together but you moved too
fast for me."

"I was rather anxious." He nipped at one of Chakotay's earlobes.

"Anxious? Oh sweetness you hit me like a phaser blast. I was
stunned and my whole body tingled for hours after the impact."

"Well you got me back the next time. That was the most incredible
blowjob of my life."

"It was my pleasure." Chakotay smiled and his dimples bloomed. Tom
poked him in the ribs playfully.

"Yeah I could see that. I almost came again watching you suck me
dry. Oh fuck, I could almost come now."

"Really?" His lover reached down between their bodies and began
stroking his trembling cock. "Are you close sweetness?"

Like the blowjob before, the commander threw his whole self into the
handjob. He moaned and gasped while his arm moved in a deliberate
motion, making it seem as if he was the one receiving the pleasure
not giving it. It was a mind-blowing experience knowing someone
could want him so much and by the amount of wetness Tom could feel
seeping from the big man's erection on to his leg, he knew that he

"Do you have any lube Tom?" Chakotay's voice creaked.

"What? Oh yeah just a sec."

Rolling back and losing the hot touch on his penis, he retrieved a
glass vial from the bedside table. Chakotay's broad back was to him
when he returned. His lover was leaning into a pillow he'd placed
under his hips and had parted his knees in invitation. Tom licked
his lips at the delicious sight.

Forgetting the oil for the moment, he moved forward and feathered his
fingers down the velvety dark expanse of skin. Leaning forward he
kissed the beautiful man's other dimples at the base of his spine in
reverence. This was all his and Tom was very, very grateful.

Finishing his blessing, he molded himself behind his lover and kissed
the nape of his neck. Chakotay was trembling, and Tom suspected it
was more from nerves than arousal.

"You haven't done this before have you?"

"No." The voice was a whisper.

Oh god the big burly first officer was a virgin. He was nearly
broken by the honour that was being handed to him. Placing the vial
between his legs to warm it, Tom blinked back his tears and began
rubbing a soothing hand over the commander's tight brown ass.

"Are you frightened."

There was a pause. "A little."

"Because of my size?"


Retrieving the oil from its warm enclave, he pressed the release on
the top of the bottle and slicked his finger. After swiping his cock
and coating it, he slipped a digit into the crack of his virgin
lover's ass.

"Is this too big?" He brushed the puckered opening then pierced it.

"Oh, oh no."

Working in an upward spiral, Tom added another finger.

"And this?" He brushed Chakotay' prostate.

"Spirits!" His knees spread wider and Tom was encouraged.

No one had ever touch the big man here and he wanted to leave his
mark. Slipping in the other two fingers and stretching the opening
further, he wiggled his digits over the gland. It was large as would
be expected with someone who produced the seminal volume Chak did,
and allowed all four of his fingers to dance independently. The
commander howled in delight.

"Now Tom do it now before I come!"

"OK baby, OK."

Withdrawing his fingers, he positioned himself between the roaring
man's knees. Tom grasped his hips and brought him level with his
hungry penis. Its salivating tip eased his entrance as he pushed
forward into uncharted territory.

In the midst of Chakotay's moans, Tom fought the urge to pump but it
was difficult. The tight hot passage clamped down him, devouring his
cock, swallowing it and pulling it deeper. Tom cried out in an agony
of self-denial while he pushed slowly allowing Chak to become used to
his size. He would make this joining painless for his lover even if
it killed him.

"Tom!" Chakotay screamed and Tom stop his forward advance.

"Does it hurt?" He said through clenched teeth.

"No dammit! Now fuck me and stop holding back!"

That was when the damn broke. Releasing all of his pent up energy
Tom let go his restraints and slammed Chakotay forward.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck!"

Like a madman he pulsed his cock in and out of his lover's ass. Tom
arched his back to lift his swollen belly upward and allow the total
length of his dick to penetrate Chakotay.

Unhuman noises were erupting from his lover and Tom joined the
cacophony with his own as the burning in veins found their center.
In a hot rush he transferred the heat from his own being into the
fiery furnace beneath him. Rainbows dashed across his vision in a
flurry before all went black.


Tom opened his blues eyes to worried brown ones.

"Are you all right? Should I call the EHM?"

It was a stupid question. The covers were over him and he was in
Chakotay's arms. He was wonderful, simply fucking wonderful but
maybe the commander wasn't.

"Did you come?"

"Yes. Now answer my question. Do you hurt anywhere?"

Closing his eyes, he cataloged all the sensations his body was
feeling right now and all of them were good. Well most of them
were. He did feel a slight twinge low in his belly but that was to
be expected after spewing out most of his bodily fluids into someone
else, right?

"I'm fine." He peered up at the concerned commander. "Did you
really come?"

"Yes and your pillow's a write off." Chakotay pulled him close and
kissed his forehead. "Thank you sweetness."

"You're welcome big guy."

"Now sleep."


"Shutup Lieutenant and close your eyes."

"Aye, aye Commander."

Cocooning himself into Chakotay's arms, Tom gave up and let himself
go again.