Summary:
Tom and Chakotay get caught with their hands on each other
and are forced
to become a not so happy couple.
Tiger?
"Chakotay? Are you all right? You look like you've seen a ghost."
"Not a ghost
Kathryn, more like a phantom. He's not real. Well, he
is but not
in the way that I thought."
"Who's not real?"
"Tiger, Tom's lover."
"I thought you were Tom's lover."
"Yes and I'm Tiger too."
"Excuse me?"
"He loves me Kathryn, not Tiger."
"But you said you were Tiger."
"I am. Small tee."
"What? You're scaring me here Chakotay."
"Remember in
the Verdanian jail when I said I couldn't marry Tom
because it
would be for life?"
"Yes, you said
you didn't want to because someone might come along
you might
want more."
"He did, he came along."
"Tom? You love Tom?"
"Yes, of course I had to marry first him to find that out."
"Sort of puts
a whole new spin on the saying about putting the cart
before the
horse. Wait. He doesn't know you love him, does he?"
"Not yet. I haven't told him."
"Then go, go tell him."
"I can't move."
"What?"
"I'm scared
to death. What if I'm wrong? What if he doesn't love
me?"
"You're kidding.
Not two minutes ago, you had my wise cracking chief
pilot adoring
you and lapping at you like big dopey Irish setter and
you're afraid
he doesn't love you?"
"I prefer to think of him as a Golden retriever pup and, oh spirits!"
"Now what?"
"B'Elanna is at the bar talking to him."
"So?"
"So well, so.oh I don't know. Oh spirits, he's looking this way."
"I think I like you this way."
"What way?"
"So head over
heels in love you don't know if you're coming or
going.
It sort of puts dent in that infallible armour of yours.
Makes you
more human. Fluster looks good on you, Commander."
"Since when
was I such an unfeeling automaton? I did tell you what
I've been
doing the last three years with your pilot, didn't I?"
"Yes but you
didn't show it. No wonder Tom doesn't know you love
him."
"He will."
"When?"
"Right now."
Bolstering
his courage with a deep breath, Chakotay slowly began
walking towards
Tom. The younger man who was staring at him with
something
akin to wonder, broke off his conversation with B'Elanna
and moved
away from the bar to meet him. He walked just as slowly.
The edges
of the room blurred as Tom got closer. When they met in
the middle
of a sea of tables and curious guests, Chakotay was deaf
and blind
to everything and everyone but him. Tom spoke first.
"Poocuh means spirit mate?"
"Yes."
Chakotay was pleased with the question. It was a good lead
in to what
he had to say. He reached for Tom's face but the younger
man pulled
away sharply. The crowd around them went dead silent.
They saw the
impending storm before he did. Chakotay didn't see it
until it hit.
"Then why the
hell didn't you tell me!" Tom yelled in a blaze of
fury.
"You wanted me to read everything else about your damn bloody
culture, why
did you leave out the most important part! Do you
realize how
crazy I've been these last couple of days thinking you
were just
play-acting? Hell for all I knew Poocuh meant thanks for
the good fuck!
I didn't even know it was an endearment until two
minutes ago."
"I'm sorry."
And he was but he was also angry. The last few days
hadn't been
an easy ride for him either and in his opinion he was the
one the greater
beef. Tom may have thought he didn't love him but at
least he didn't
think he loved someone else. That was worse, much
worse.
He stepped up into the younger man's personal space and
growled.
"But at least I didn't lie about it. I just neglected to
mentioned
it."
"I didn't lie."
"No? Then tell me Tom, who's Tiger?"
"Oh shit, that."
"Yes, that."
"Okay, okay
you are but tiger doesn't mean spirit mate. It just
means you're
an animal in bed, like a tiger. Get it?" Tom spat into
his face and
then said with his arms outstretched, "Big, big
difference
Chak, huge in fact."
"Then why didn't
you tell me he wasn't real, if I was he?" That was
hard to say
when you were pissed off.
"Because, because.-"
Tom stammered while his beautiful blue eyes
misted.
Oh damn, he hadn't meant to hurt him. Chakotay suddenly saw
Tom's side
of the issue through those tear filled eyes.
"You were afraid,
weren't you? You didn't want to say it first in
case I didn't
feel the same way." He said gently regretting his knee
jerk reaction
to Tom's hostility.
"Hey!
We're supposed to be talking about Poocuh here not tiger."
Tom pointed
out defiantly with rapidly blinking eyes. The quick
movement of
his lids caused the unshed tears to fall and trickle down
his flushed
cheeks.
Chakotay's
could now see how much his change in demeanor threw the
younger man.
He went with that and continued to speak calmly.
"We're not talking, we're fighting again."
"I know!" Tom yelled in frustration.
"I love you." Chakotay said playing his ace. The crowd aahed.
"I know that
too." Tom said softly while sniffing loudly and wiping
his leaking
eyes with the heel of his hand like a ten year old boy.
It was adorable
and the crowd once again made a sympathetic noise.
"Do you love me Poocuh?"
Tom's bottom
lip stuck out in a pout. Didn't the man know how
incredibly
cute he was when he lost his hard edge? "Oh no fair using
the `P' word."
Oh spirits,
way too cute. Chakotay couldn't be mad him now if he
tried.
"All's fair in love and war." He replied lightly.
"Lame."
Tom offered with a hint of a smile. He was getting to him
and now for
the final blow. If this didn't work, well Chakotay
didn't want
to think about that.
"Maybe.
Now answer my question." Chakotay looked deeply into his
husband's
eyes that were for Tom quite literally the windows of his
soul.
"Tom Paris do you love me because the spirits know I love you
with all that
I am. You're more important to me than, my duty, my
religion and
my life. You're my husband and Poocuh and I intend on
loving you
until the end of my days."
"Oh shit." Tom's eyes lowered in what looked like misery.
"Not the answer
I was looking for." Defeated, Chakotay took a step
back.
The younger man's head flew up when he saw the movement of his
feet.
"I love you Chakotay!" Tom screamed.
Like someone
had just fired a phaser into his chest, Chakotay's
breath was
knocked from his lungs. Knowing Tom loved him and
actually hearing
him say it was two entirely different things. The
confidence
he felt earlier in the conversation failed him. He stood
dumbfounded
staring at his red faced, bright-eyed husband who was
doing about
the same back. Nobody spoke, nobody breathed. A
tangible hush
descended on the holodeck.
"Kahless!
Just kiss him!" Rang a frustrated voice through the Irish
countryside.
Chakotay didn't
know to whom the command was directed at and didn't
have long
to wonder. In a rush, Tom launched all six feet three
inches of
his body at him wrapping his arms around his neck.
"Oh god Chak,
I've loved you for so long." He expelled into his neck
in one hot
breath. "I didn't think I'd ever be able to tell you."
Placing his
hands on his biceps, Chakotay pulled Tom back from the
sanctuary
of his shoulder so he could see his face.
"Tell me again Poocuh."
"I love you."
His pink mouth tried to twist into a sneer but it
collapsed
in a wide smile. "Now are you going to kiss me or what?"
"I would be happy to my beautiful husband."
To the sound
of tinkling glasses and applause Chakotay folded Tom
into his arms
and kissed him deeply.
It was the
sweetest thing and it was the most passionate thing. The
kiss had balance,
fire and heat, tenderness and love.
It was a perfect
thing.
THE END . .
. well almost,
"Hey Tiger did you see the row of outhouses by the stage?"
"Yes Poocuh. Meet you in the last one in five?"
"Make it one."
"Done."
THE END . . . of the beginning.