Title:  Changes P6
Fandom:   Star Trek:  Voyager
Pairing:  Chakotay/Tom Paris
Rating:  NC 17
Series:  6 of ?
Email for feedback:  forbesc@skyia.com
Disclaimer:  Voyager and her crew are the property of Paramount and
not me.  Whatever.

Summary:  Chakotay has a heart to heart with Kathryn, Etien and
lastly but not least, Tom.

"Are you banging my helmsman Commander?"

"Kathryn!"

This was not the reason he'd left the bar for.  Not trusting Etien's
home, he had waited until now to report to the captain his new
information regarding the virus.  Chakotay was pretty sure the dark
alley he'd slipped into was free of surveillance devices.

"Oh please Chakotay don't sound so shocked.  We're both adults and
besides I'm asking for purely professional reasons only."

"Like hell you are."

"OK, OK maybe not totally but with all the other subterfuge going on
down there, I need to know something for sure.  I can't make sound
decisions while blindfolded Commander."

He still didn't see why the information was necessary to the mission
but it would be nice to talk to a friend about his new found feelings
for the pilot.

"Yes Kathryn," Using her first name instead of her title, he set the
tone of the conversation. "I am banging your helmsman."  He finished
also using her crude vernacular to further ensure the communication
wouldn't go into her professional log.

"That's bit of change for you isn't it?"  She didn't skip a beat at
the revelation.

"That would be putting it mildly."

"He's your first isn't he?"

"Yes and my last.  I'm keeping him Kathryn."

"Really?  Oh shit you're down there falling in love and I'm up here
missing all the fun."

"Fun?  It hasn't exactly been that.  I've been to hell and back
trying to figure out how I feel about him."

"Yes, yes but it must have been one hell of a journey.  Lieutenant
Paris is an awfully tasty dish, oh but I suppose you know that now."

"I'm learning."  He said evenly knowing she was hoping for another
indignant outburst.

"I bet you are but all kidding aside, watch yourself.  He may be your
first but you're definitely not his.  Tom has an honest soul but I'm
not so sure about his heart.  Love has a different meaning for the
men in the Paris family."

She was speaking from experience he knew.  As a young ensign she had
fallen for the affluent senior Paris and had been heartbroken when
she'd realized their liaison had only been sex for the older man.

"Tom is not his father Kathryn."  He said softly mindful of the
emotional scars she still carried to this day.

"I know that but you're still playing with fire and I don't want you
to get burned.  Promise me you won't fall too hard for him Chakotay?"

"It's too late for that.  I already love him more than anyone else
I've known before."  He smiled.  It felt good to say the words aloud.

"Damn.  Well then promise me you won't let it endanger the mission.
The Doc's started his own search for a cure but even with this new
information he still might not find it in time to save Harry."

"You can count on me Kathryn."

"Yes I know that too.  Well good luck…-" She paused.  "On both
fronts.  Janeway out."

Pressing his fingers together, Chakotay cut the transmission and then
tucked the communicator back into the pocket of his jeans. In a rush
he headed out of the alley and back to the freehouse.  Tom was alone
and he needed to get back to him for more than one reason.  As he
rounded the corner of the brick wall, he ran into another fleshier
one.

"Going somewhere Commander?"

********

"Get out of my way Etien."

Trying to back the dark man back into the alley, Etien stepped into
his personal space.  The maneuver worked, but only marginally.
Chakotay didn't retreat but molded his body along the inner wall of
the back street.  It would have to do.

"Who are you?"

"A friend.  Now let me pass."

"I will 'Commander' after you tell me the real reason why you're on
my planet."

"Don't push me Etien or I won't be so friendly."

There was hint of fear in the mysterious alien's eyes but not for
himself.  Etien was sure that nothing much would frighten this strong
man unless of course you threatened someone he loved. Like the
lieutenant for instance.

"Your 'helmsman' is safe.  My people are watching out for him.
Now
if you want my help, you'll answer my question."

With a searching gaze that sent a chill down his spine, Chakotay
assessed his sincerity.  After a moment the hard set to his jaw
softened and he moved a foot back into the sparsely lit alley.

"How much did you hear?"  His voice was still resolute but had lost
its defensive edge.

"I came in right after your Janeway said something about banging.
She meant fucking right?"

"Yes.  So you know we're not of your world.  We're visitors who
because of unfortunate circumstances have to stay a little longer
than we planned.  Nothing I've told you was a lie."

"Tomai isn't a true Danai then."  Defeat weighed heavily on his
shoulders.  These people were off worlders and couldn't help him or
his population out of the tragic mess they were in.

"At heart I think maybe he is.  Tom hasn't lied to you either Etien.
He celebrates life as much as the Danai do but he was born on a
planet light years away from here."

"Then there's nothing left to hope for.  Hate is going to win over
love."

"I don't understand."

"Corlear is dying Chakotay and I don't mean because of the virus.  Oh
it's a contributing factor, but it's only a excuse."  Etien slumped
down on the dirty lane and the off worlder followed him.

"The Danai and the Corlies are of same species aren't they?"

Etien looked at him surprised.  "Why would you say that?"

"Because you live on the same planet and your metabolisms work in
concert, not well obviously but they do.  Somehow your two groups
evolved in different directions."

There was genuine interest Chakotay's voice as he spoke and it
sparked a glimmer of hope in Etien.  If the dour man had heart enough
to accept the wildly exciting Tomai maybe he could accept the Danai
too.

"We carry the same genetic markers but it has been hypothesized that
the similarities came from sharing the same environment not the other
way around."

"So you don't know for sure?"

"No but it doesn't matter, were separate now.  For centuries our
differences has generated a slow building intolerance and this recent
virus is driving us apart even further.  It will be the end of both
our races."

His companion sat quietly beside him studying the detritus of the
alley floor.  Etien feared he'd lost him until he heard Chakotay's
deep voice resonated off the brick walls.

"It's a wake up call."

"A what?"

"The virus, its not suppose to divide you but bring you closer
together.  The spirits or whatever gods you worship have laid a
common tragedy at Corlear's doorstep to open your eyes.  It's
supposed to be an opportunity for life not a death sentence."

"That's a naive and over simplistic view Commander.  People don't
easily change after years of strife."

"No perhaps not but what other choice to you have?  It's either
change or die."

"Will you help us do that?"

"I can't.  I have directives that prevent me from doing so."

"How convenient for you."

"It's not like that Etien.  I'm not afraid of pushing boundaries.
I've done that my whole life but we're strangers here and as such,
have no right to interfere with your society."

"Then your Harry will die."

"What?"

"I can't get the serum Chakotay."

"But you're a Danai.  I was told you had access."

"Only if I kill and I'm not prepared to do that for anybody."

"Tom was right then.  You are being forced to infect the Corlearians."

"As I said change is hard and for some of us, unwanted.  Hate is
finding ground on both sides Chakotay."

The dark alien closed his eyes and tipped back his head into the cold
wall behind them falling into a meditative prose.  It was how the
handsome man sorted his thoughts, Etien now knew.  He waited
patiently for his decision taking the time to admire his body.  It
was a Danai trait to value beauty when given the chance no matter the
circumstance and it was one he hadn't indulged in for a while.

For so very long he had suppressed his natural urges in the name of
the cause that he had forgotten the pleasures it gave him.  Chakotay
was a strong compassionate being that brought his natural desires
forefront and made him feel truly Danai for the first time in ages.
It was little wonder that a magnificent creature like Tomai loved
him.  Etien was starting to love the man a little himself.

"You'll have to come back to the ship with me and explain to the
captain the situation on your planet."

"Wouldn't that be against your directives?"

"No.  We've already spoken the governing body in your province.
Talking to you should be no different.  Kathryn will understand."

"Then I agree but we should go now, tonight."

"What is it?  Is Tom in danger?" Chakotay sat forward and Etien saw
the fear rise again in his soul stealing ebony eyes.

"Possibly.  You have to understand Chakotay that my people find him
very beautiful and as a result follow his lead.  There are some that
won't be pleased with his popularity."

"But he hasn't done anything that doesn't conform with your
society."

"Oh but he has."

"Like what?"

"He fell in love with you and did so in front of an audience.  So
even if your captain didn't see the fun as she called it we did and
it was infectious as the virus.  In our present climate the Danai are
not supposed to show true affection for the Corlies."

"The beasts?"

"Yes."  Etien flinched with shame at the word.

"And the same people who mete out the serum with death won't like
that will they?"

"No."

"Then let's go get Tom."

Chakotay stood up and held out his hand.  Etien stared at the wide
palm briefly before placing his own, more slender one in the meaty
grip and letting it pull him upright.  Staring down at the alien, who
was half a head shorter, Etien knew a line had been crossed with the
taking the proffered hand.

Ulien was no longer his master, Chakotay was.

********

"You're not hot?"

"No Etien."

The green/gold alien, who was by the way dressed in only a pair of
sheerest emerald pants, played his tattooed fingers down the red and
black front of his uniform jacket.

"Then what about your cock?  You can't possible tell me those pants
give it room to grow.   What happens if you become aroused?"

"I shift a lot."  Tom caught his fingers before they touched his
groin.  "Look do you want to trade fashion tips or do you want a
drink?"

"A drink please.  Something blue."

"Oh fuck what else."

Tom turned quickly on his barstool and ordered two Romulan ales
before the transplanted alien could go on again about the colour of
his eyes.

After meeting with the captain and making a pit stop in his quarters
to change into a uniform, Tom had taken Etien to see Harry in
Sickbay.  While there, the Doc had removed the violet tint from his
irises as a medical safeguard, dumbfounding the tall Danai.  Blue
wasn't a colour inherent in either of the Corlearian races and Etien
had spent the better part of an hour singing its praises.  Tom had
invited him to Sandrine's just to shut the babbling man up.

"When will Chakotay get here?"

"I don't know.  The captain and he have a lot to talk about.  Why?"

"No reason."  Etien said with false innocence and turned lazily on
his barstool facing the growing after shift crowd sipping his ale.

Etien was being coy and all of sudden Tom wished the subject of his
eyes would come up again.  He wasn't sure what had happen exactly
between his lover and the cool tattooed man across from him but it
had been enough for Chakotay to break the rules and beam all three of
them up to Voyager.

In the meeting, nothing had been said that either one of them hadn't
known before.  Well OK to be fair they hadn't known that Etien
couldn't get the serum but that was beside the point.  Chakotay and
the Danai were supposed to hate each other and not act like comrades
in arms.  Tom gulped at his own drink and tried to fight down his
irritation with the fiery blue liquid.

"So his tattoo is real and not fake like yours?"

"Yeah what of it?"  He tried to keep the biting tone out his voice
but failed.  Not that it mattered.  Etien took no notice.

"His has more dignity, more…more…-" He held his glass up and
then
punched the air with it.  "More grace.  Yes that's it more grace."

OK that was bloody well it.  Tom was officially, undeniably and
irrevocably jealous and he hated it.   Being so good at so many
things, flying and fucking being among them, he was unused to
competition and found it left a bad taste in his mouth.

Chakotay had told him he was in love but that had been to a tall,
violet eyed, platinum haired blond much like the package beside him
in Sandrine's.  Before this mission the stalwart commander hadn't
given the regular plain old Tom a second glance.

"How many times have you made love to him Tomai?"

"My name is Tom and that's none of your fucking business."

This time the alien took notice of his elevated tone, as did the
first three tables around them.  Etien swiveled back to face him.

"You honoured me Tomai but I assure you I am not worthy."

"What?"  Etien bore that kind, adoring look again and it confused Tom.

"He does all this for you, not me."

"Chakotay only does what's right."  He blurted out defensively.

"My point exactly.  Now if you're done being jealous of someone as
insignificant as me, how about introducing me to one of your
friends."  He signaled for two more ales.  "The cabin you showed me
is awfully cold and stark and I would prefer not sharing it alone
tonight."

"You, you don't want him?"

"I didn't say that.  Truth be known, I'd take either one of you and
count myself blessed but I know that isn't going to happen.  You love
each other and no one can come between you ever.  If anyone should be
jealous, it should be me."

Shit, shit and triple shit.  What an idiot he was.  Etien was the one
that had lost his love not him.  Tom slapped his forehead and then
turned to his new friend trying to literally pour out his humiliation
from every fibre of his being.

"OK, OK so I'm a stupid fuck.  It's just that he means so much to me
and I'm his first man.  I keep thinking that now that he's gotten a
taste of someone like me, he's going to want to expand his palate
further.  I'm sorry."

"Don't be and he won't.  Chakotay feels too deeply for you.
Besides," Etien smiled and took his hand.  "I don't even think he's
noticed you're a man."

Tom smiled back.  He couldn't help it.  Etien was right.  Chakotay
loved him for who he was not what he was.  He could be as androgynous
as the J'naii for all the commander cared.  Feeling buoyant he
squeezed the Danai's hand then released it to take a healthy swig of
his blue beverage.

"Well come tonight he's definitely going to notice."

"Oh so the answer to my question is never.  Chakotay's a virgin."

"What?  Oh shit yeah."

"And from that eloquent response I'd guess so are you."

"No I've topped before."

"But not with someone who has never bottomed?"

"Well no."  His smiled waned a little.  All of sudden he didn't feel
so cock sure.  "But I remember my first time so…-"

"So nothing.  You were a child the first time someone fucked you,
right?"

"I wasn't a kid, I was twenty."  He said defensively, knowing his
bottom lip was pouting out and unable to stop it.

"The ripe old age of twenty were you?  Forgive me for my
presumption."  Etien finished his drink and ordered them another
round.  "And how old was your lover?"

"I don't know, twenty five or six."  He took the proffered glass and
touched its rim to Etien's before drinking half its contents.

"Was it his first time?"

"No I don't think so.  Will was a charmer and I probably wasn't the
first young cadet he'd seduced into his bed with his gregarious
style."

"Ah style, that's it.  You need to take the commander with finesse
and grace."

"And how the hell am I supposed to do that?"

"Be yourself."  Etien leaned over and ran his fingers over the
delicate hoops in his left ear that he'd forgotten were there.

"Be Danai Tomai."

********

"Do you want something to drink?"

"No."

"You're sure?"

"Yes but if you do…-"

"No I'm fine."

"Me too.  Fine I mean."

"Good."

"Yeah good."

The air went dead between them.

Chakotay crossed the living area of his quarters and sat at the
opposite end of the lounge where his lover was.  After scrutinizing
the length of his nails and making a mental note to book himself for
a manicure in the near future, he peered sideways at Tom.

Oh spirits he looked wonderful in his uniform and if he could only
get over this supreme bout of nerves, he might actually do something
about it.

"The meeting went well?"

"Meeting?"

"With the captain."

Oh damn yes.  How could he forget when he'd spent most of the
conference imaging the taste of Tom's lips on his.

"We're going to meet with Aulnoy tomorrow. Hopefully we can start a
dialogue between them and the Danai."

"Great."

"Yes, great."

Silence reigned again.  Chakotay started to catalogue the pictures on
his vanity shelf when he stopped himself.  What the hell was wrong
with him?  For spirits sake, this was the same man he'd fucked up the
ass in a dark alley and now all of sudden he couldn't even string two
intelligent words together let alone look at him without blushing
three shades of red.

"Do you want to go in the bedroom?"

He tore his eyes away from the picture of his mother.

"What?"

"We don't have to do anything.  I'd just like to hold you for awhile
if that's OK?"

He looked at Tom head on for the first since the younger man had
arrived in quarters.  The still platinum haired but now blue eyed
blond's Adam's apple bobbed up and down his throat erratically.
Damn, Tom was as nervous as he was.

"It is."

"Good."

"Good."

Neither one of them moved and silence reigned supreme once again.

"Do you want me to go home?"

Go?  Oh no he was really screwing this up.  Chakotay wanted nothing
more than to make love to Tom all night long and then wake up
tomorrow morning in his arms.  He took a deep breath and attempted to
convey his feelings to the man that was quickly becoming his
everything.

"No and I don't want you to ever leave."

"You want me to move in with you?"

Oh damn that wasn't exactly what he was trying to say but then again
it wasn't such a bad idea.  Having Tom warm his hearth and home was
definitely appealing.  Chakotay looked harder into those ocean blue
eyes and decided no, it would mean more than that.  It would make him
feel whole.

"Yes."

"Man oh man, you mean that don't you?  Oh shit of course you do.  You
never say anything you don't mean.  You could tell me we were back in
the Alpha quadrant when I was looking at the map of the Delta in
astrometrics and even Seven's handiwork would have to be wrong
because you never could be.  If I saw the sky was blue and you said
it was green I'd believe you and it you said day was…-"

"Tom!"

"What!"

"Do you want to live with me or not!"

"Yes!"

In one fluid motioned the pilot flew at him and his lap was suddenly
filled with a six-foot man.  Long arms and legs seemed to splay
everywhere but curiously everything fit.  With his nervousness gone,
Chakotay wrapped his arms around the waist of his new roomie and
pulled him for a kiss.

Lips so eager engulfed his making him wonder why he had felt so
unsure in the first place.

Perhaps his fear was born from the conflict on the planet they now
orbited.  In the last few days he had seen lots of sex but little
love.  There had been exceptions, like Etien for his people but for
the most part the relationships between the Corlearians had been
dismal.  Then again it could just be that having someone as alive as
Tom Paris for a lover still hadn't registered for him.

It was all apples and oranges, Danai and Terrans, old dogs and new
tricks, whatever.  The whys didn't matter as long as he had him.
Chakotay was still a little afraid because of the dynamo in his arms,
but now he was more frightened of losing him than having him.

"Chak?"

"What baby?"

"I want to fuck you tonight."

Oh damn, he took all of his previous thoughts back.  Now he was
absolutely terrified all over again.  Tom Paris wanted to have him
too, and this was the scary part, he meant it literally.

Spirits!

TBC