Title:
Changes P11
Author: Cheryl Forbes
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Pairing: Chakotay/Tom Paris
Rating: NC 17
Series: 11 of ?
Email for feedback: forbesc@skyia.com Disclaimer: Voyager
and her crew are the property of Paramount and
not me. Whatever.
Summary: A not so 'welcome'
welcome home.
"Where's Harry?"
With everything that had happened
in the last day, he hadn't felt
this kind of bone chilling fear
until now. Searching the bio-beds
that lined Sickbay's walls, Tom
looked again for his friend before
turning back to the doctor.
"Please, please tell me he's in
stasis." Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck.
"He's not Mr Paris." The EMH
replied blandly as he began to remove
the violet tint from his eyes.
Tom grabbed his wrist eliciting a
yelp. "Mr Paris!"
"Where the hell is he then!"
"On the bridge!"
"What?" That was not the answer
he was expecting, not that he was
disappointed, no not that.
It was just that when Harry hadn't been
in the last place Tom had seen him,
he had assumed the worst.
Fatalism was another thing he'd
have to work on.
"Well at least that was his destination
when he left Sickbay."
"He's awake?"
"No he found you with his eyes closed,
of course he's awake
Lieutenant." The Doc tore
his hand out of Tom's white knuckled
grasp. "Now can I finish…-oof!"
In a burst of joy, Tom captured
the patronizing hologram's face with
both his hands and kissed him full
on the mouth. Sputtering the EMH
pushed at his chest, seating him
back further on the bio-bed,
breaking the contact.
"You found the cure. You're amazing
Doc!" He gave the EMH and
congratulatory punch in the arm.
The doctor rubbed his arm and rolled
his eyes. "Yes Mr Paris.
However," Sighing, his cold holographic
features melted. "You did
help."
"I did?"
"Yes by giving me access to biological
samples from both Corlearian
races, I was able to synthesize
an antidote to the virus."
"You didn't need a fresh liver?"
"No, of course not." His eyebrows
rose indignantly. "I'm a doctor
not a butcher."
"Yeah whatever. So you made
a serum?"
"I thought we'd already discussed
this Mr Paris."
"Humour me." He felt so good,
that even the Doc's bad attitude
couldn't bring him down.
"Yes and an inoculation. Nobody
on Corlear should ever have to
suffer with the disease again."
"You're amazing Doc."
"Yes you said that." The EMH
raised the regenerator. "Now can I
finish turning you back into your
usual charming self?"
"After you see to Chakotay."
"The Commander? His bruises
are superficial and can wait. I would
rather remove the," He stopped his
impatient diatribe, understanding
dawning. "Oh don't tell me,
he's infected right?"
"It wasn't his fault."
"I didn't think it was." The look
in his photonic eyes told Tom who
he thought was to blame. He
was right.
Switching from the regenerator to
the medical tri-corder the doctor
spoke as began to scan his vitals.
"How long ago did you engage in
sexual intercourse with the commander?"
"About six or seven hours ago."
Tom couldn't help the grin that
accompanied his answer.
"Are you sure?" The EMH's
voice was puzzled.
"Oh yeah." The Doc gave him a disapproving
look and Tom gathered his
face together trying to appear serious.
"It was in the forest when
we're escaping. He didn't
want to come inside of me but I sort of
didn't give him much choice."
He finished apologetically.
The doctor squinted at the tri-corder's
readout.
"You're not infected Mr Paris."
"What?" He grabbed the device
from the hologram's hand to see for
himself. "I have to be.
I felt him come."
This made no sense whatsoever.
The virus was aggressive and it
should have started to work its
way through his system the moment
Chak had cried his name in release.
"That may be true but there's no
sign of the virus in your
bloodstream." Gently the hologram
retrieved the tri-corder from his
numb fingers. "If the commander
is infected, it's possible he's only
a carrier and unable to pass on
the contaminated enzymes. He would
have to be Corlearian to be contagious."
"So he can get sick but not make
anyone else?" He mumbled in
shock. "But I thought he could."
"And thinking that, you had sex
with him?" The doctor was
outraged. "What you did was
tantamount to suicide!"
"No Doc, it wasn't that."
"What was it then Mr Paris?"
"It was survival."
********
"I said sit Commander!"
Fighting the urge to slug her one
across the jaw just as he had
Ulnae, Chakotay obeyed the captain's
order and sat back down in the
chair in the doctor's office.
It would have felt damn good but it
wouldn't have made her a very receptive
listener and right now he had
a few things he needed to say to
his bitch of a commanding officer.
Ordering him into the EMH's office
to tear a strip off of him was
inappropriate. What she should
have done is have the Doctor examine
them all, including Ulien and Ulnae.
Sending the two Danai to the
brig without checking on their welfare
was wrong. Chakotay wasn't
the biggest fan of either of the
men but that didn't mean they didn't
deserve to be treated humanely.
"Kathryn," He began as calmly as
his turbulent emotions would allow.
"Oh don't you Kathryn me!"
She flew from around the other side of
the doctor's desk to perch on its
edge across from him. "What the
hell do you think you were doing
down there!"
"Fulfilling my mission."
"How, by fucking my pilot?
Oh I don't think so."
That's what this was all about.
She was angry over his continued
relationship with Tom.
Initially he had taken her subtle
warnings as friendly advice. She
had been hurt by a Paris and didn't
want to see the same thing happen
to him. Knowing her history
he had understood her concern and had
been genuinely touched by it.
They were good friends and her opinion
was important to him but she was
crossing a line here.
As much as he loved her, he had
no intention of justifying his
reasons for loving the pilot because
his father had screwed her over.
"This conversation is over."
He rose to leave.
"What conversation? You haven't
told me a damn thing."
"Because you haven't been asking
the right questions Captain."
He stood and looked her square in
the eye hoping his use of her
formal title would bring her back
to her senses.
Kathryn pursed her lips at him and
then lowered her head, exhaling
her breath forcefully. Chakotay
remained where he was and gave her a
moment to collect her raging emotions.
She would have done the same
for him. When she looked
back up at him, she seemed more in control.
"I hate that you're with him Chakotay."
"I know." He said softly.
Using the heels her hands, Kathryn
lifted her butt and sat back
proper on the doctor's desk.
Her rage was subsiding and it was
evident when she spoke. Her
voice was almost wistful.
"He gets his looks from his father,
did you know that?"
Chakotay shook his head no and sat
back down. He relaxed his frame
and opened his body and his mind
up to her.
"Sometimes when were on the bridge
and he's done something really
spectacular with Voyager like skim
along the event horizon of a black
hole or finds a tactical opening
that keeps us from getting our butts
scorched, Tom gets this look."
She laughed a small laugh. "His blue
eyes sparkle and his face glows."
She stopped and bit her bottom
lip. "Owen used to do that
when we made love."
Chakotay was well acquainted with
the statement. Only he hadn't
noticed it until recently.
"I know the look. It's beautiful."
He took her hand. "And it makes
you love them."
"Yes."
"And hate them when they take it
away."
"Yes that too." Kathryn gave
him a halfhearted smile. "He's going
to hurt you Chakotay."
"I know."
The words had seemed right and had
flowed easily out of his mouth.
It wasn't something he wanted to
admit to Kathryn and certainly not
to himself, but it was true.
Tom would hurt him. It was a foregone
conclusion that the wild young man
he'd come to love beyond all else
would eventually do something that
would test his patience or try his
soul. It was the price of
loving him and it was one he was more than
willing to pay.
"You don't care do you Chakotay?"
"About what?"
"Tom is going to break your heart
and you don't give damn."
"No I suppose not." He admitted.
"Then you're more fucked up than
I am." She was smiling a cock-eyed
smile and Chakotay knew then that
she had come to some inner peace
with the relationship within herself.
"You're telling me?" He smiled
back at her. "I'm in love with a man
and I'm not even gay. I'd
say my neurosis beats yours hands down."
"You're one sick puppy Chakotay."
"You bet your ass I am and I'm loving
every minute of it."
"OK now we've established we're
both nuts, let's say we get the
doctor to check out our prisoners.
I seem to remember you giving one
of our guests a mean right hook."
"A reflex."
"Yeah, uh-huh. Shall we go?"
Getting up from the desk, Kathryn
headed out the doors of the
doctor's glassed in office.
As she reached the exit she stopped and
spoke over her shoulder in a hushed
tone.
"Off the record, I still don't like
it Chakotay."
"Off the record, I still don't care
Kathryn."
Chakotay saw the muscles in her
back clench through her
uniform. "Understood."
As they headed out into Sickbay's
treatment area, Chakotay
anticipated their next argument.
He hadn't told her that he had
asked Tom to move in with him or
that the pilot had accepted his
proposal.
Proposal, it was an interesting
word.
********
"Tom?"
Harry cautiously ventured further
into the cabin whose panels had
opened automatically at his bio-signature.
The room was dark and
held an eerie quality for him.
These doors should have never opened
for him and what's more, Tom should
have never asked him to meet him
here.
"Tom are you here?" He called
again weakly. There was no answer.
Maybe he hadn't arrived yet.
In his anxiety, Harry had shown up for
the meeting ten minutes ahead of
schedule. It was one his nervous
quirks and one that Tom was well
aware of.
After beaming up the scrabbled he'd
located on the planet, Tuvok's
security report had informed him
that his friend had indeed been one
of the signals he'd locked on to.
A few excruciating hours later,
Tom himself had commed him on the
bridge and had asked him to meet
here of all places.
Killing time, Harry gravitated over
to the transparent shelving that
lined one of the walls of the diverse
but tastefully decorated
cabin. Brightly coloured woven
rugs in block patterns adorned the
other walls warming the room and
drawing the eye to the clutter of
holo images on the clear casing.
Somehow the simplicity of the other
features of the cabin brought the
importance the pictures forefront.
"Pretty." Harry said to no
one in particular about a woman with big
dark eyes and long hair swept up
like a crown around her head. He
smiled and caressed the holo still
with the tip of his finger gently
before moving on.
A man with big hat but a bigger
smile filled the next frame. Harry
didn't know who this guy was with
the white fedora and laughing eyes
but he wished he did. He seemed
real, which was something he'd been
striving for these last few hours.
Harry was about to move on to the
next image when he heard a cry come
from the next room.
Was that Tom? It sounded an
awful like him and it sounded like he
was in pain. Forgetting the
people on the wall, Harry bolted for the
bedroom. As he neared the
entrance the screams became louder, more
desperate and his panic rose.
Was Tom in trouble? Like before, the
panels slid open at his approach.
"Oh fuck, oh fuck, yeah, oh yeah…ohhh!"
His world tipped again, as the first
things he saw were the soles of
Tom's feet. Which by themselves
were pretty ordinary. It was where
they were seated that caused his
senses to swirl. In the dim light
of the candle lit room, they glowed
like two oblong beacons from the
tops of Commander Chakotay's wide
shoulders.
Harry knew Tom had been lusting
over the commander for what seemed
like forever but it was still a
shock to see them together. The
commander was a straight as they
come, wasn't he? What the hell had
happened to change that? Harry
began to entertain his alternate
universe theory again as he watched
the two sweating bodies on the
bed moving together in passion.
"Spirits Tom, I have to come!
I have to, I have to…-"
"Not yet baby, not yet…" Wailed
the man flat on his back.
Harry stood mesmerized as the well-sculpted
ass and back facing him
contracted into molded relief and
held still. Shadows blended from
light to dark over the tightened
muscles making the commander into a
work of art. A priceless one
and being a museum fanatic, Harry knew
from priceless.
Standing quietly on the inside of
the door, Harry let the panels
close encapsulating him in the same
room as the lovers. Harry was
thankful that neither Tom nor Chakotay
heard the quiet hiss.
He knew he shouldn't be here and
should leave, but couldn't. With
all the wacky things that had been
going on since he'd woken from his
supposed coma, this was the only
thing that made sense and he found
comfort in it. This was familiar
even if his friend's bed partner
was a little surprising. Watching
Tom fuck was one his favorite
pastimes. Harry slipped his
hand into his pants.
Falling back deeper into the shadows,
he observed the commander's
controlled movements as he tried
to stem his orgasm while bringing
Tom closer to his. A broad
fist stroked the pilot's cock furiously
as dark buttocks flexed and pushed
in slower contrast against moaning
blond's ass. Talk about your
hand eye coordination, Harry chucked,
quickly slapping a hand over his
mouth. He was beginning to realize
that this wasn't a simple fuck for
his friend and that maybe his
presence wouldn't be appreciated.
For one thing Tom was bottoming,
which was something Harry had never
seen him do. In all the parties
both small and large they had
attended, the pilot was always the
one doing the taking. Many night
Harry sat back in a quiet corner
satisfying himself while watching
Tom top everyone in the room both
male and female. The pilot hadn't
minded him being the voyeur then,
in fact he got off it but this time
might be different.
"Love you Chak, love you, love…oh
fuck!"
Oh yes definitely different.
Shit, he had to get out of here.
"Now baby? Please tell me,
now?" The strain in the gravely voice
contrasted markedly from the commander's
monumental physical
control. Harry blew his breath
out over his teeth in admiration.
"Yes!"
Harry jumped at the pilot's passionate
cry but made no move to leave.
Instead he stroked his bursting
penis faster and watched the
beautiful love play unfolding before
him.
The commander had fallen forward
over Tom bring the lanky blond's
legs down around his waist.
From his angle at the end of the bed,
Harry could see the way their bodies
molded seamlessly together.
Chakotay' cock was so deep in Tom's
ass, they seemed like one
person. When the bigger man
began to move, only brief flashes of
candlelight pierced the space between
their forms. It was like
everytime the commander pulled out,
he couldn't wait to get back in.
Harry wished he knew what that was
like.
Pulling harder on his dick, he imagined
himself Chakotay. Leaning
back on the wall, he closed his
eyes and listened as Tom reached his
orgasm. If he had known that
this was what the promiscuous pilot
really liked, he would have done
something more than just watch.
Letting his own release spill over
his fingers, Harry slid in a daze
down the wall beside the door.
"I love you."
"I love you too, old man."
Sounds of wet kisses and rustling
sheets brought Harry out his
stupor. Crawling on his hands
and knees, he exited the bedroom
hoping the two men on the bed were
still too into each other to
notice the muted light from the
other room.
"What was that?"
"Nothing Chak, come here."
Harry heard as the panels slid closed.
Getting up from the floor, he
did up his trousers and headed for
his quarters to clean up. He was
going to miss his appointment with
his friend but at this point it
didn't really matter.
Harry had just seen everything he
suspected Tom wanted to talk him
about and the pilot wouldn't be
angry with him for skipping the
meeting because in truth, he hadn't.
Tom had known all along that he
was in the room.
********
"How was you little home 'coming'
party?"
"Kathryn I thought were here to
talk about the Danai in our brig."
"We are, we are. I just wanted
to make sure you were feeling better
after your brush with death."
She said over her shoulder after
grabbing a coffee from the replicator
and sitting on the lounge.
"I am." He said calmly not
resenting her bitter remarks this time
around and following her to the
couch.
After finding out he'd been infected
by the virus, she had gone
ballistic and rightly so.
He should have told her about Ulien's
crime in the Doc's office but had
been too intent in focusing on her
lack of protocol to remember his
own. Well that and trying to figure
out how to tell her he'd asked Tom
to live with him. So now in
repentance, he allowed her a few
cutting jibes.
"Thank you for allowing Tom and
I some time alone before this
meeting."
She waved him off with her hand.
"I needed some time to think."
"So what have you decided?"
"Besides getting the hell out of
here, not much."
"May I suggest releasing Ulien and
Ulnae into Etien's custody."
"And not Aulnoy's? He does
represent the governing body and in
effect the law on this god awful
planet."
"True but I think we should leave
the Danai to the Danai. They would
know better how to deal with one
of their own and I expect would do
so in a more human manner than the
closed minded Corlearians."
"And if the Corlearian government
knew about Ulien's transgressions,
it would give them another reason
to hate the Danai. You want them
to make love not war. Is that
what you're trying to tell me
Chakotay?"
"Yes and with the gift of the synthesized
serum, it should go along
way in uniting the planet's two
races."
"But there's no guarantee.
They've hated along time Chakotay."
"People can change their feelings."
"Are you talking from personal experience?"
"Yes I suppose I am."
He could see by the doubtful look
in her eye she wanted to ask whose
feelings had changed his or Tom's
and gave her credit for not asking.
"OK, cut'em lose and call your boyfriend
to the helm. We're getting
the hell out of Dodge."
"Aye, aye Captain."
He was really was going to have
to talk to her about spending too
much time in holo novels.
********
"What's up your holy putridness?"
"Tomai. My fallen angel."
"Your failed assassin, you mean."
Tom stood uncomfortably in front
of the disposed master. The
hair on the back of his arms bristled
and he wasn't sure if it was from
standing too close to the force
barrier of the brig or the black
and red Danai's piercing stare.
"What do you want?"
"I wanted to apologize."
"Oh fuck that's rich. I think
it's a little too late for that
Ulien. You tried to
kill my lover and that's not in my books, a
forgivable offence."
"That was war and I do not regret
my actions."
"Then what then? I really
do have better things to do than speaking
to you."
"I'm sorry for what my lieutenant
did to your Chakotay."
Tom looked over the slimy man to
Ulnae who was huddled in the back of
the cell. The green and orange
inked Danai seemed familiar but Tom
could quite place his face.
"What did he do?"
"He raped him." Ulien said
with the barest hint of satisfaction.
"You're lying." Tom said deadpan.
Ulien had to be bluffing.
Chakotay would never let something
so horrible happen to him.
Stepping back, Ulien arched one
black silk draped arm towards the
simpering man behind him.
"Ask him."
Looking away from the twisted grin,
Tom spoke in a hushed tone to the
man Ulien's hate had twisted.
"Did you?" Was all he could manage.
It was hard enough for him to think
the "R" word, let alone say it
out loud thanks to his experiences
in Auckland.
"No but I wanted to take him and…and
he offered. He was beautiful
and he was yours, but I didn't touch
him." Ulnae sobbed. "Not with
my flesh anyway."
Terror struck Tom's heart.
"With what then?"
"My phaser. I'm sorry.
I was hurting so badly, I needed someone to
hurt as much as I was and he was
there. I could have taken him and
he would have let me but it wasn't
what I needed. I'm so sorry
Tomai."
Oh gods. Chakotay had tried to seduce
his jailer to save him and it
had gone wrong, terribly wrong.
Tom needed to get to him now, not to
talk about the incident, but just
to hold the amazing man. Despite
his ordeal, Chak had seen to only
to his needs and had even made love
to him in the forest. It must
have been incredibly difficult to
allow such intimacies after his
violent assault.
It had taken years before sex had
become more than a reflex for Tom
after his incarceration at the penal
colony and yet after only a few
hours, Chakotay had fucked him with
passion and love. His lover was
now his hero in more ways than one.
"So do you accept my apology Tomai?"
"Yes." Tom was surprised at
his answer but not as surprise as the
creepy alien on the other side of
the force field.
"What?"
"You just made me love him more.
Thank you."
"But Ulnae raped him!"
"Yes I know but he didn't permanently
damage him or me."
It was true. The assault had
nothing to do with how he felt about
Chakotay or how Chakotay felt about
him. There was trauma yes, but
like any other injury, over time
it would heal. Tom would make sure
of that and be with the old man
at every step of the process.
"I have to go now your royal mustiness.
It was a slice."
"But, but…-" Ulien sputtered.
Leaving the frustrated Danai in
the brig, Tom calculated how many
ways he could apply first aid to
the big bear of a man he now shared
a home with. He only came
up with one.