Synopsis: This is a coda to "Revulsion". In the final scene of the episode B‘Elanna invited Tom to her quarters that evening. The following is one interpretation of what might have happened between them that evening.

Disclaimer: Viacom/Paramount owns Star Trek and its characters. I am just borrowing them briefly, for fun not profit.

"Revulsion: Postscript"
by Julie Evans (comments to Juli17@aol.com)
 

B‘Elanna paced her quarters anxiously. She didn‘t know why she was nervous. Everything was settled. This morning Tom had offered her a way out, and for a heartstopping moment she‘d thought it had been his own wish, to forget everything she‘d said and pretend it hadn‘t happened. But she couldn‘t- wouldn‘t- do that, deny what had taken her so long to realize, and so much courage to admit. Her own honor, which she had only recently begun to value, had demanded that she tell the truth.

So she‘d told Tom that she‘d meant what she‘d said, that she was in love with him. Then she‘d offered him a way out. And babbled on, telling him he didn‘t have to reciprocate, they could just forget it, on and on, while her entire being was terrified he would take her up on it. Instead he‘d stopped her, told her to shut up.

B‘Elanna‘s mouth quirked slightly at that memory. Not the most romantic rejoinder, but she‘d known what he meant. It hadn‘t been a command, or a harsh exclamation of annoyance. Tom had looked right at her as he spoke, his expression both exasperated and affectionate. It had been a request to stop torturing herself, stop trying to save face with him when there was no need. To stop protesting and just kiss him.

Then Tom had taken her hand, pressed himself against her and kissed her. And she had happily, fully returned his kiss, her hand drifting up to touch his face. Tom‘s hand had moved up then to caress her cheek, and at that moment, with the wall at her back emphasizing the feel of Tom‘s body pressed so close to hers, she had felt perilously near to losing control.

And that was the moment the doctor had burst through the door into the corridor, stopping right in front of them. She and Tom had pulled away reluctantly at the interruption, then B‘Elanna had quickly excused herself. Even though the kiss had been impulsive, she‘d felt a little embarrassed to be caught like that in the corridor. Especially by the doctor, who she knew wouldn‘t be able to resist commenting on it the next time they crossed paths. And that hadn‘t taken long.

Well, no one will be around to interrupt us now, B‘Elanna thought, as she ran her hands down the clinging folds of her black dress. Just her and Tom. Gods, she wanted this. She‘d been waiting for this. So why was she so damned nervous?

So nervous that she jumped several centimeters when her door chimed.

"Come."

Tom Paris entered, wearing snug black pants and an open necked white shirt. And carrying a bottle of wine in one hand, and a single red rose in the other. He stopped just inside her door and they stared at each other for a long moment. Then he walked toward her, and B‘Elanna licked her lips nervously as he approached.

"Is that for me, or are you just hungry?" Tom asked in a lightly suggestive tone.

B‘Elanna rolled her eyes slightly as Tom moved by her to set the bottle of wine on the table. Trust Tom Paris to immediately toss off a joke. But it gave her a chance to regain her equilibrium, and maybe that had been his intention. Besides, she was hungry. And not for food, she knew, as Tom turned back to her.

Tom held out the rose to her. "You look beautiful," he said in a low, soft voice.

Tom had told her that before, more than once. B‘Elanna had sensed instinctively that those words fell easily off his lips, that he could and had said it to every woman he‘d met. She had certainly known from the day she‘d first met him on Voyager that he was a natural charmer. But slowly and surely she was coming to believe that he meant that phrase differently when he said it to her. That he meant it sincerely. That he meant her. Even if she couldn‘t quite accept that she possessed such an attribute herself. "Thank you," she whispered, taking the rose from him.

Tom smiled as she brushed one of the petals lightly with a finger. Gods, she really was beautiful. He knew she‘d always dismissed most of his compliments out of hand, and probably with good reason given his reputation. He wasn‘t sure she believed him now. But if he had to tell her every day for the rest of her life, he would somehow make her see how beautiful she truly was. Completely and utterly beautiful.

B‘Elanna hadn‘t planned it, she‘d left all expectations of this evening open. Dinner, conversation, then maybe they would move forward immediately, maybe they wouldn‘t. But the look in Tom‘s eyes as he stared at her with frank admiration and desire completely undid her. She threw her arms around his neck, pressed her body to his, and kissed him. The rose slid from her hand and dropped on the floor.

Tom was only briefly surprised, then his arms slid around her and he kissed her back, opening his mouth to hers as they tasted each other completely. His arms tightened as the kiss deepened, and he was amazed at how surprisingly fragile her slender body felt in his arms, when he knew full well she could take him easily in a fair fight.

B‘Elanna didn‘t feel like fighting fair at all. She moved one hand along his spine, gripped a fistful of his shirt and pulled. Her hand caressed the warm skin of his back just before he pulled away from her.

Tom pulled back, but he kept his hands on her waist, reluctant to break all contact. He tried to even his breathing and think clearly despite the desire that was coursing through his body. He stared at B‘Elanna‘s flushed face, swollen lips, and confused expression. Still, she didn‘t move her hands from where they lightly rested on his shoulders.

"Tom, what-"

"Are you sure, B‘Elanna?" Tom asked hesitantly. She frowned at him as he continued. "I don‘t want to rush you. We can do this as fast or as slowly as you want."

B‘Elanna looked at Tom‘s flushed face, swollen lips, and his shirt half pulled out of his pants, and almost laughed at his sudden attack of chivalry. Suddenly he was the nervous one. Then she felt a twinge of uncertainty herself. "Tom, are you saying you want to date for awhile first?"

Tom smiled. Put that way, it did sound a little after the fact. "I don‘t know, B‘Elanna. Somehow I feel like we‘ve been dating for months. Lunches, dinners, evenings on the holodeck. We‘re not exactly in a normal situation here on Voyager. We‘ve spent more time together in the past few months than most married couples I‘ve known. I think we‘ve gotten to know each other pretty well..."

B‘Elanna nodded. She knew Tom better than anyone on this ship now, even Chakotay. Better than almost anyone she‘d known in her life. "We‘ve been good friends for a long time, even before we started to feel..."

"Attracted to each other?" Tom finished lightly.

B‘Elanna ran a finger across Tom‘s shirt collar. "I think maybe it‘s too late to "rush" things, Tom. And now that we know how we feel..." B‘Elanna hesitated, and cursed herself inwardly for doing it, but she couldn‘t help herself. She had to say it, because it had been nagging at her, even though she had no doubts about how Tom felt. "I think I know how you feel..."

Tom sighed. He couldn‘t blame B‘Elanna for that one. And it bothered him that she was looking at his shirt collar rather than at him. He reached up and pushed her hair back from her face, then rested his palm along her jaw and forced her to look up at him. "You do know, B‘Elanna," he said softly. "I‘m sorry I didn‘t say it right away. I was just so surprised-"

"I know, Tom." She‘d never forget the look on his face when she‘d blurted out those words. "I could see how shocked you were. But I meant every word, even if it took me so long to admit it. I‘ve never said it before, I‘ve never felt-" B‘Elanna shook her head then, maybe she shouldn‘t be saying so much. Tom didn‘t make any reply, he just smiled slowly and his expression was gentle as she added somberly, "And if we hadn‘t been rescued, at least I would have been with you at the end..."

"This way is much better," Tom joked, though his smile faded a little. Now that it was after the fact, he hated remembering how close they had come to never experiencing any of the moments he knew were soon to come, that he had never truly believed would happen. Just like he didn‘t want to remember the scare he‘d gotten when she and the doctor had beamed to Sickbay after their run in with that psycho holojerk this afternoon. "But just for the record, I also meant what I said then. If it was going to happen, the last image I wanted to carry with me- forever- was your face." He moved his hand caressingly along her jaw, and brushed her lower lip with his thumb. "Your beautiful face."

B‘Elanna swallowed, unable to speak for a moment. Then she reached up and pulled Tom toward her. "You‘re right, Tom. This is much better." She pressed herself against him and kissed him soundly, deeply, knowing he felt her heart beating as rapidly as she could feel his.

"B‘Elanna," Tom breathed shakily, when he could breathe again. He pulled away slightly from her and dropped a soft kiss on her ridged forehead. "One last thing. I have to tell you something..."

B‘Elanna smiled at Tom‘s deliberate reuse of her own words to him.

She gave him a teasing look of mingled impatience and expectation.

"What?"

"I‘ve been a coward, too," Tom said softly. "I wasn‘t just shocked at your confession, B‘Elanna. I panicked a little. I haven‘t used those three words very sincerely, in fact the last time I think I really meant them at all was when I was a child. I wanted to tell you how I felt-"

B‘Elanna shushed him with a finger to his lips. "Tom, the words aren‘t that important."

Tom sighed. He took her hand in his and kissed her palm lightly. "I have something else for you besides the wine."

"Dinner? I thought that was my department."

Tom smiled at B‘Elanna‘s teasing tone. "Somehow I think we‘re going to miss dinner. Unless you‘re hungry?"

B‘Elanna smiled back. "Oh, I‘m hungry." She gave him a suggestive look and slid her free arm around his neck. "But not for food."

"Oh, B‘Elanna," Tom said in feigned shock. Then he squeezed her hand, wrapped his free arm tighter around her back and returned her suggestive leer. "Hold that thought. Computer, play song selection Paris 1997 Watch This."

"A song?" B‘Elanna echoed. She knew how much Tom liked certain types of music, especially old songs from Earth‘s distant past. The kind he played in Sandrine‘s. Tom dropped her hand and wrapped both arms tightly around her as the song started. B‘Elanna‘s hands slid around Tom‘s neck and she stared into his eyes as she listened to the words.

"If you‘ve never felt what happens when two hearts fall
together,
Or never seen love written in the stars and knew it was
forever,
If you don‘t believe that destiny can start with just one
wish,
Watch this.

I‘ll show you love, like you‘ve dreamed of,
I‘ve got so much to give,
Watch this.

Don‘t be afraid, you‘ll be amazed
At all the ways that I can
Show you what you‘ve missed,
Just close your eyes, and watch this."

Tom‘s mouth descended on B‘Elanna‘s and they kissed, hands tangling in hair, bodies melding closer together, ravenous for each other and not caring about any of the fears and insecurities that had held their hearts apart until this moment. They no longer mattered.

"A broken heart can‘t always live in fear, afraid to
fall,
I can make those feelings disappear in no time at all,
If you want to feel the world stand still, from the magic
of one kiss,
Watch this.

I‘ll show you love, like you‘ve dreamed of,
I‘ve got so much to give,
Watch this.
Don‘t be afraid, you‘ll be amazed
At all the ways that I can
Show you what you‘ve missed,
Just close your eyes, and watch this."

Tom fell backwards on the bed he and B‘Elanna had managed to stumble into in the midst of their ardor, as their shoes were kicked off, and Tom‘s white shirt was discarded on the floor. B‘Elanna landed on top of him, her black dress rucked up to her thighs. Tom ran his hand up one of those slender smooth thighs and along her slightly protruding spine, where the fastenings of her dress were already parted. He stared into her passion clouded brown eyes and his heart almost stopped as he came to a realization.

Maybe that old adage was true. He was suddenly sure it was true. He‘d been waiting for this woman his whole life. The idea of what he held in his arms was both exhilarating and terrifying. "I love you, B‘Elanna," he whispered, as her mouth descended to trail soft kisses along his throat.

B‘Elanna raised her head and smiled down at Tom. Her heart skipped a beat as she met the passionate look in his cerulean eyes. "Don‘t tell me, Tom," she whispered back softly. Her eyes were shining with love and desire. "Like the song says, show me."
 
 

"Just close your eyes, and watch this."

B‘Elanna closed her eyes, and Tom blissfully showed her- slowly, eagerly, passionately, deliberately, completely, lovingly. And then she showed him back.

The end.

Song credit- "Watch This" copywright 1997, Giant Records.
Written by Smith/Barker/Harbin, sung by Clay Walker