Title: Just Another Winter's Tale
Disclaimer: Paramount's, not mine.
Summary: A holiday PWP
"Oh. I thought the holodeck was free. I didn't know you were about to use
it, Chakotay. Sorry. I didn't mean to intrude," Tom apologised, turning away
from the holodeck doors, intending to leave.
"Tom, wait. You're not intruding. I don't actually have this time-slot
booked, so if you want to use the holodeck, you're very welcome to,"
Chakotay said, smiling. "Although, I must admit I'm surprised you're not in
the Mess Hall enjoying the Christmas party that Neelix is staging."
"I thought I'd give that a miss," Tom responded with a shrug. "I fancied
going for a stroll instead."
"Really? I thought you were always up for a party, Tom. It's not like you to
escape to the holodeck on your own when there's festivities to be enjoyed."
"Actually, Chakotay, it's *very* like me. But as most people never bother to
get to know me, they wouldn't be aware of that, would they?" Tom remarked as
he decided to take the offered slot, keying in the program sequence before
entering the holodeck.
Chakotay stood unmoving for a second or two, then followed the younger man,
stopping just inside the door as a sudden gust of wind blew a flurry of snow
into his face. "Tom. I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry if you thought I
was making false assumptions about you, but I honestly thought you enjoyed
the occasional parties we have aboard ship. You always give that
"Yeah, I know," Tom sighed, pulling the heavy coat he'd purposely worn more
tightly around him. "I give the wrong impressions about a lot of things," he
muttered, turning to face the other man. "Look, Chakotay, it's me who should
be sorry, not you. I shouldn't have got so defensive. I guess it's just this
time of year. I've never really enjoyed it much."
"Oh, I see," Chakotay nodded, although his expression gave away the fact
that he didn't see at all.
Tom picked up on it immediately. "No, you don't, Chakotay," he said with a
slight smile. "You're just trying to be kind and sympathetic, the way you
always are. You actually have no idea what I'm talking about. Do you?"
Chakotay gave a wry grin, and glanced down at the thick layer of snow that
covered the ground. "Busted," he said quietly as he looked back up into
Tom's amused face.
Tom laughed, then gestured with his head towards a path, edged on both sides
with banks of drifted snow. It was quite narrow, and led through a group of
tall conifers towards some unseen destination. "Want to walk with me?" he
Chakotay smiled back at the unexpected invitation. "Yes, Tom," he answered,
rubbing briskly at his arms. "But I think I need appropriate outer wear
before we set off. I'll have to go back to my quarters and get my coat. I'll
only be a few minutes."
"That's okay. I'll wait here for you," Tom said, kicking at a small pine
cone, one of many that lay scattered around.
Chakotay nodded, then left. When he returned five minutes later, Tom was
nowhere to be seen. He looked around, noting the footprints in the otherwise
undisturbed snow that covered the path, and after waiting a short while to
see if Tom would return, decided to follow them.
Snow was falling silently around him as he made his way through the trees,
the firs catching many of the flakes as they drifted slowly down from the
heavy clouds, their branches white, and bending under the weight of the
accumulating snow. It was peaceful. Nothing disturbed the quiet, except the
sound of his boots crunching through the snow beneath his feet as he trudged
along. It was the kind of tranquil setting that he often conjured up for
himself on the holodeck, but he'd never thought that Tom might also enjoy
the serenity afforded by a place such as this. Before he could give any more
thought to Tom's choice of program though, the man in question came into
Chakotay stopped, watching the younger man as he stared through the falling
snow towards a range of low hills beyond the trees. Tom looked lost in his
thoughts, and Chakotay was unsure whether to approach him. The decision was
taken from him though, when, in an effort to ease the numbness caused by the
cold, he moved his feet, and inadvertently stepped onto a patch of twigs
that lay half buried in the snow.
Tom turned around, his attention caught by the sharp sounds of the twigs as
they snapped, and he gave Chakotay a small smile before walking towards him.
"You look warmer now," he commented, looking approvingly at the thick coat
the older man had put on. "Sorry I didn't wait for you," he apologised. "But
I got a bit restless. I didn't think you'd have too much trouble finding me
"No, your tracks were pretty obvious," Chakotay said, smiling. "This is a
beautiful place, Tom," he added, glancing around. "And as different from the
atmosphere in the Mess hall as it's possible to be."
"Yeah, that was the whole point," Tom said, brushing away the snow that had
settled in his hair. "I wanted to get away from formality for a while."
"You didn't like Neelix's idea that everyone should wear dress uniform,
"No, I didn't," Tom confessed, shuffling his feet. He turned to look down
the path. "Come on, let's walk. I'm getting cold standing still."
"Okay," Chakotay agreed, and they set off towards the hills, leaving the
shelter of the trees behind. They walked in silence for a short way, the
wind whipping up the fallen snow and mixing it with the flakes that had yet
to reach the ground, blowing it into their faces and making them sting with
the cold. Chakotay rubbed at his reddened cheeks, then glanced at Tom. "Why
snow, Tom?" he asked. "Why not some equally beautiful and quiet setting,
"Because *this* is what I always wanted when I was a child, Chakotay," Tom
stated, gesturing with his hands at the snow-covered landscape. "This is
what I always wanted Christmas to be like, but it never was. You probably
"Try me, Tom," Chakotay suggested, taking hold of Tom's arm as he came to a
halt. "I don't *always* just nod and smile, you know. Sometimes I actually
*do* understand," he said with a grin, although his words were sincere.
Tom laughed and shook his head. "Yeah, I know you do, Chakotay. And it's
kind of you to offer," he said, touched by the older man's concern for him.
"But I don't want to bore you with my tales of woe. You must've come to the
holodeck with relaxation in mind, not counselling sessions."
"You wouldn't be boring me, Tom. I'm genuinely interested. I'd love to know
about your childhood," Chakotay said, studying the younger man as the snow
swirled around them, large flakes already beginning to cover the trail of
footprints they'd left. "You were right earlier, you know," he continued.
"I've never really got to know you. And that's been a mistake. One that I'd
like to rectify, if you'll let me."
Tom looked surprised. "Really?" he asked "You really want to get to know
"Yes, I do, Tom," Chakotay confirmed. "I've wanted to for a long time, but
I've never really known how to approach you. Or if I should."
"Oh." Tom looked away, staring towards the tall firs that were now barely
visible through the heavily falling snow. "The weather's getting worse," he
remarked as he turned back. "Why don't we head for the trees again. It's
more sheltered there."
"That's a good idea. And perhaps we can talk on the way," Chakotay
suggested, stamping his feet to ease the numbness that had returned while
he'd been standing still.
"What do you want to talk about?" Tom asked. "My childhood? Or why you want
to get to know me?"
"Both," Chakotay replied as they set off towards the trees. "But first I'd
like to know the reason you came *here* instead of going to the party."
"I already told you the reason," Tom answered, frowning. "I wanted to get
away from formality. The idea of putting on dress uniform really didn't
appeal to me."
"But why, Tom? You've worn it to other functions before without complaining.
What's different about *this* party?"
Tom sighed, a haunted look appearing on his face. "It just reminded me of
home," he said quietly. "And all the things I missed out on when I was a
Chakotay frowned, noting the sadness apparent on Tom's face, and in his
voice. "I don't understand, Tom," he said softly. "What did you miss out
"A childhood, Chakotay. That's what I missed out on," Tom replied bitterly.
"And all the fun that's supposed to be had at Christmas. You have no idea
how lonely and boring it was to grow up in the Paris household."
"No, I don't, Tom," Chakotay agreed. "But I'll know if you tell me," he
prompted. "What *was* it like?"
Tom stopped, leaning against the trunk of a tall fir tree as he turned to
look at the older man. "It was like living at Starfleet Headquarters," he
announced, angrily. "*Every* *single* *day*. Even at *Christmas*. We
couldn't even celebrate *that* without it being turned into an official
function. Instead of a nice, cosy family gathering, like most of my friends
enjoyed, from as far back as I can remember, I had to endure a day
surrounded by my father's bootlicking subordinates. It was hell, Chakotay.
And I couldn't even console myself with my presents. Do you know why?"
"No, Tom," Chakotay answered, moving towards him and placing his hand on the
upset man's shoulder. "Tell me," he said softly.
Tom snorted, then shook his head, his gaze dropping to the white ground
beneath his feet. "Because they were only for show," he stated quietly. "My
'presents' were more for *them* than me." He sighed, the weight of
Chakotay's hand on his shoulder relaxing him slightly as he continued. "I
remember when I was six years old, Chakotay. My father gave me these
wonderful models; replicas of sailing ships and old automobiles. But after
I'd unwrapped them, I wasn't allowed to touch them again. They were put on a
shelf in his study for all his colleagues to admire, but I wasn't allowed to
go anywhere near them. I had to content myself with looking at them from a
distance. Can you imagine what that was like for a six year old boy?"
"No, Tom. I can't," Chakotay said, stepping closer, then gently squeezing
the younger man's shoulder.
"Well, it was awful," Tom stated, looking up, his gaze caught by Chakotay's
sympathetic brown eyes. "My only escape was to go to my room and pretend I
was somewhere else. I'd get out some old picture books I had, look through
them for illustrations that depicted the sort of Christmas I wanted, then
I'd lose myself in my imagination. That's sort of how this holodeck program
came about. I know I'm not a child any more, and it shouldn't still bother
me, but Neelix's Christmas party reminded me of too many bad memories, and I
wanted somewhere that was as far removed from them as possible."
"And *this* is what you always wanted Christmas to be like?" Chakotay
queried. "Somewhere cold, and alone?"
"Not exactly," Tom said, still looking into Chakotay's eyes. "I've never
really wanted to be alone. Things have just never worked out for me where
that sort of thing's concerned."
"Yes. I know what that's like," Chakotay remarked quietly. "Things have
never worked out for me either." He dropped his hand from Tom's shoulder,
and looked up at the thick clouds overhead, sighing heavily as the longing
he always felt when he was near Tom began to overwhelm him. He sighed again,
then his thoughts were interrupted by Tom's soft voice.
"Are you okay, Chakotay? You look really sad. D'you want to tell me about
Chakotay was quiet for a moment, unsure what to say. "There's not much to
tell, really," he finally answered, brushing the snow from his coat sleeves
and watching it fall to the ground. "I'm alone. I don't want to be. But...."
"But what, Chakotay?" Tom asked, grabbing the older man's hand before he
could brush at his sleeve again. "What is it? *Who* is it?"
Chakotay swallowed hard, closing his eyes as he summoned up the courage to
say what he'd always wanted to say, but had never dared. It was now or
never. "You, Tom," he answered quietly. "It's you." He quickly looked away,
attempting to pull his hand from Tom's grasp, but the younger man held him
"So *that's* why you want to get to know me better?" Tom asked softly. "You
Chakotay nodded. "Yes," he replied simply.
Tom laughed, shaking his head as he grabbed Chakotay's other hand. "I don't
believe this," he said, gently squeezing Chakotay's cold fingers as he
pulled the other man closer. "I've wanted you since the first day I met you,
Chakotay, but I never thought I'd ever have a chance with you," he
confessed, still shaking his head in wonder. "This *is* for real, isn't it?
You really *do* want me?"
"Judge for yourself, Tom," Chakotay answered, smiling with relief, and
amazed that his feelings were reciprocated. He stepped forward, pushing the
younger man until his back was against the tree trunk, then leaned in and
found Tom's lips, kissing him hungrily as he finally achieved what he'd
spent years longing for.
"Yeah, I guess you *do* want me," Tom said, panting slightly when Chakotay
eventually released him. "D'you want to take this somewhere else?"
"No, Tom. I don't," Chakotay responded, pressing against him. "I want to
take you here. Now."
"Then take me," Tom whispered, closing his eyes and tilting his head back,
snow falling gently onto his upturned face.
Chakotay sighed softly, his lips against Tom's neck. "You can't imagine how
many times I've heard those words in my dreams, Tom," he murmured before
nipping at the younger man's throat. "But they've never sounded quite so
sweet as they did just then." He moved to Tom's cheek, licking at the flakes
of snow as they melted on the warmth of Tom's skin, enjoying the man's soft
moans as he found his lips. Pressing Tom back against the tree, he devoured
the younger man's mouth, fumbling with the fastenings on first Tom's coat
and then his own until they were open, and their bodies could meet with less
clothing between them.
Tom groaned, his erection straining against the material of his pants as
Chakotay's groin met his, their bodies instinctively moving to create the
friction they both craved. He moaned again as hands slipped inside his
shirt, his breath catching at first as cold fingers caressed his skin, the
gentle movements sending a shiver of excitement down his spine. Tom moved
his own hands to Chakotay's waist, pulling him in closer, the older man's
movements speeding up as he rubbed against him. "Chakotay, please," he
whispered. "Please. I need more."
Chakotay stepped back, pulling off his coat and quickly spreading it out
over the snow-covered ground. He tugged at Tom until they were both
stretched out on top of it, his now warm fingers working to undo the
fastenings on Tom's pants. "I want to taste you, Tom," he stated, his
fingers delving inside the younger man's shorts, wrapping around Tom's
erection and bringing it out into the chilly air.
Before Tom could moan about the cold, a warm, moist mouth engulfed him,
making him moan loudly. "Oh, yes. Yes," he breathed. "That feels so good. So
good. Oh..." He trailed off, his hands gripping the dark head at his groin
as he slowly pumped into Chakotay's mouth. He felt the older man's hands
grasp the waistband of his pants, gently pulling them down over his hips,
then further, until they were at his knees. Fingers worked their way to the
backs of his thighs, gently rubbing and massaging them, the effects of the
cold air cancelled out as the actions warmed him. Tom groaned as he felt the
hands slowly moving higher, and a finger found its way between his cheeks to
press insistently at the opening there. It pushed inside him, moving in and
out as another joined it. Tom moaned again, pulling out of Chakotay's mouth.
Removing his coat, he turned onto his front. "Please, Chakotay," he begged.
Chakotay responded instantly, bending over the younger man and running his
tongue between Tom's cheeks, his hands gripping Tom's hips as he began to
probe deeper. Tom looked back over his shoulder, shivering slightly from
Chakotay's attentions, and the flakes of snow that were falling on his
exposed skin. "That's all I need, Chakotay. Take me. I'm ready," he
Chakotay nodded, then opened his pants to reveal his painfully hard
erection. Moistening his hand with saliva, he coated the entire length, then
gently pulled the younger man to his knees. Placing the tip of his erection
at the opening to Tom's body, he groaned softly, then louder as he slowly
With the snow falling on, and around them, they moved together, the silence
of the winter landscape broken by their continual moans and gasping breaths
as they headed towards their goal. Chakotay draped himself over Tom's back
as he moved rapidly inside the younger man, thrusting hard and deep, his
hands around Tom's waist as he pumped his lover's erection, and fondled his
balls. As he moved, his lips pressed against Tom's neck, kissing and sucking
the pale skin, leaving his mark on the younger man.
Tom groaned loudly, and as his orgasm hit, Chakotay erupted deep inside
Tom's body, both men falling forward then as they collapsed together onto
Chakotay's coat. They lay panting, Chakotay's body still covering Tom's
before he eventually moved to one side. He pulled Tom into his arms, hugging
him tightly as they gently kissed, minutes passing before they finally broke
Tom smiled, gazing up through the still-falling snow at the branches of the
tree they were beneath, and his smile grew wider. "Perfect," he said softly,
directing Chakotay's attention to a plant with green, waxy leaves, and white
berries, growing on the tree's trunk, and spreading along a branch a few
metres above their heads.
Chakotay smiled, the significance of mistletoe not unknown to him. "Do you
know that according to one custom, this means we're now promised to each
other in marriage?"
"Really?" Tom asked, gently stroking Chakotay's cheek. "I think I like the
sound of that custom." And his lips met Chakotay's for another long kiss.