Title: Dreams Turned Nightmares
Warnings: Major Character Death Warning.
Disclaimer: Tom, Harry belong to Paramount. Titanic belonged to the White Star Line.
Summary: Tom and Harry are young men who unfortunately board the Titanic for a new life.
"Can you believe it? Can you?" Young Harry Kim bubbled as he shouted. He was attempting to keep up with his closest friend, Tom Paris who was tugging his hand as he ran toward the giant ship.
"Come on Har, faster, this is our future." Tom quickly replied.
The R.M.S Titanic was moments away from leaving port, so Tom and Harry sprinted toward the remaining open hatch, with their third class tickets securely in their hands.
They ran up the walkway to the hatch, and Tom handed their tickets to the officer. "Have you being through the inspection?" The officer asked, as he had with everyone today.
"Of course!" Tom replied for Harry as he always did. "Anyway," Tom continued. "We're Americans."
A nod from the officer told them they could board, so Tom stepped back to allow Harry to go first. They quickly searched for their cabin, which was close by. Then Harry grabbed Tom's hand and both men ran for the top deck of the boat.
"Who we waving too?" Tom asked, curious.
"Everyoneanyone." Harry answered.
"Come on Harry." Tom said, pulling gently at Harry's arm. "Let's go get something to eat." Feeling the resistance in Harry's arm Tom continued. "We can come back after we've eaten, ok?"
"OK Tom. What are we getting to eat?" Harry jumped down from the side and Tom wrapped his arm securely around Harry.
They had lunch, or what qualified as lunch for third class, and as promised, Tom took Harry back up on deck.
"Come on, Tom," Harry had been giddy ever since they had boarded 3 hours earlier, and he had yet to slow down. "Let's go right to the front!"
Tom sighed. He knew Harry would be excited over this, but Tom was worn out and just wanted to rest. Although his heart melted at seeing the expression his own sigh brought to Harry.
"Come on then, Harry. Right to the front. But then we have to get some sleep. We can be up bright and early tomorrow."
"OK Tom." They rushed, thanks to Harry pulling on Tom's arm, all the way to the front of the ship. Harry begged to lean over the edge and look down, but Tom refused, until tears formed in Harry's eyes.
"Oh Harry." Tom began. "What am I going to do with you?" Tom wiped away a few loose tears, which had begun to fall, and turned Harry forwards, towards the ocean. Holding him securely around the waist, he let Harry lean over.
"Come on, Har." Tom started again after about 15 minutes of this. "We've been here long enough, I'm tired, it's time for bed."
"Tommm..." Harry whined like a small child.
"Harry, you promised me!"
Feeling chastised, Harry's head went down and he said mutely "Yes, Tom."
"Harry, this is going to be a whole new life to us." Tom said as he put his arm over Harry's shoulder.
They walked slowly back to their cabin, silent all the way. Once inside, Harry went straight into the bed, still wearing all his clothes. Tom just sighed and leaned against the door watching the sleeping man.
He had been tired all day, and he had been a little rougher with what they were going to be doing than usual, but this constant sulking wasn't helping. "Harry, you can't sleep like that. Come on buddy, help me out here."
He pulled Harry's boots off, then his socks. Moving up the bed, he struggled to pull the top off the unwilling body.
Tom hated to do anything to upset Harry, but he needed them to stick together and knew what he was going to say next would do it.
"Do you want me to find somewhere else to sleep Harry?" Seeing no response, Tom went farther. "So you will be all 'alone?'"
The word clicked in Harry's head, and he quickly pulled the top off himself and ran up to Tom. "No Tom! Please. I'm sorry. I'll get ready. Don't leave me."
Tom grinned at Harry's attempt to pull his trousers off with one arm still in the shirt he had not taken off completely. After a few haphazard turns, Harry fell back on the bed.
"Need some help their Har?" Tom was only joking, but Harry was obviously upset, as Tom heard the tears once again begin.
"I'm so dumb!" Harry wailed to himself. "I don't know why you stay with me, Tom?"
Tom didn't know if that was a statement or a question, but he took it as a question. Tom answered as he helped Harry take off the remainder of his clothes. "Your not dumb Har. You're smart, and strong and brave."
A tone of protectiveness came over Tom's voice. "You promise me Harry, if anything ever happens to me you won't let anyone push you around?"
Harry pounced on Tom, pinning him to the bed. "Nothing's going to happen to you Tom." Harry shouted, in an almost desperate voice.
"No. Not now Harry, but someday I won't be there for you, and you'll have to take care of yourself."
"I don't want to be alone." Harry sounded shattered at the thought.
"Let's not think about this now!" Tom rolled Harry back over, and pinned him down. "Now let's get some sleep, ok?"
Harry nodded and settled down in bed, dressed only in his pajama bottoms. He fell asleep almost immediately, leaving Tom to undress, and get in bed with him.
There was another bed in their room, but when Tom and Harry has first slept together, Tom found that Harry shouted in his sleep. He had shouted almost every night until Tom climbed into bed with him. And on every subsequent night, Harry continued to sleep silently provided Tom was next to him. It was a minor inconvenience, but not much to do for a night's sleep.
Tom climbed into bed, carefully nudging Harry across the bed slightly. They would have to spoon tightly tonight, as the beds were not very wide. Tom pulled Harry against him, and soon after he was settled, he fell asleep.
The morning came all too soon, as Tom woke to a dead arm and a heavy weight. He forced open his eyes to see Harry's closed one's above him. Harry's delicate torso was resting on Tom's arm.
"Harry." Tom spoke softly into his ear. "It's morning. Wake up time."
Harry just murmured something Tom was unable to understand, then snuggled further into
Tom's warm embrace.
It was about eight or nine in the morning Tom guessed, so they didn't have to be up yet, but Harry would want to be up on deck, enjoying himself, not just in bed the entire trip.
Tom tried again, this time not speaking, but slowly running his soft hands up Harry's smooth back. He continued until he found Harry's most sensitive spot. He had found out about a few months back, and used it to his full advantage whenever the need arose. Tom began to lightly stroke the spot, almost tickling it, which brought Harry to full wakefulness.
"Tom, stop it!" Harry giggled, pushing Tom's hands away.
"Morning, Har. I thought you would want to go up on deck again today, and not just lay about?"
"Mmmmm" Harry moaned out again. Rubbing back into Tom's warm chest. "Can we stay here for a little while?"
Tom knew they should get going, but he couldn't deny Harry this. It did feel good.
They stayed in bed for another half-hour until they finally arose and started their day.
(Up on Deck)
"Why can't we go right up to the top Tom?" Harry begged.
"That's only for first class, Har. You know that. Only the rich area allowed up there."
Harry pouted and looked saddened. It broke Tom's heart to tell Harry this. He wanted Harry tohave everything, do anything he wanted, but they just didn't have the money to afford anything better.
Tom and Harry had wandered about everywhere there was to wander this day and had met a few friendly people.
They met an Irishman and his family who were very cordial, and had told them about a party that would happen every night until the ship reached New York.
"Can we go Tom?" Harry asked eagerly as soon as he heard.
"Yes Harry, of course we can. We'll get something to eat and then go."
Harry rushed through his entire meal, and then sat on the edge of his seat just watching Tom eat, frustrated that he was taking so long.
"Ok Harry I'm finished. We can go."
That night they danced, drank and laughed. Tom had more fun than he had in a long time, and it only got better when he realised Harry was having just as much fun.
The night went on, and eventually Harry and Tom left for their cabin. The next few days, were basically the same. Exploring, Tom answering more questions that Harry asked and then, another party to end the day.
It was late night on the 14th of April 1912.
"Tom, we've seen everything here!" Harry said, bored. "Can't we sneak up to the top deck?"
Tom sighed. "Harry, we've talked about this. We'd get in trouble if we went up there, you know that!"
"Please Tom. We'd only look around for a few minutes, and then come back down. Please?" Harry continued to whine.
"We'll go up, Harry. Just have a quick look around and then come back down, alright?" Tom gave in and made this deal. He could never deny Harry for very long.
The crept up to the top deck. Managing to avoid any officer or first class passenger on their way up.
"Wow!" Harry spoke in awe. "This is fantastic Tom!"
Tom's heart constricted at what simple things could make Harry so happy. "Enjoy it quickly buddy. We have to go in a minute."
It was approaching 11:30pm, and an officer would be going to all the gates to check if they were locked. So they didn't have long.
Suddenly the ship shuddered, forcing Harry and Tom to grip the sides to stop themselves from falling.
The ship stopped rocking and Harry's panic set in. "Tom, what was that? Is he ship going to sink? Are you ok?"
Tom attempted to calm Harry, but was unsure himself. "Harry, I'm sure it was just an engine that broke down or something."
"But what if it wasn't, what if" Harry was silenced by Tom's lips on his. Tom knew he shouldn't do it, but they were alone, and he needed to calm Harry down.
What surprised Tom most was that Harry didn't pull back. He did just the opposite, pushing further into the kiss, his tongue fighting with Tom's. Tom was thrilled. He'd never felt this way before, and his body was on fire with the contact.
"Hrry." Tom mumbled into the kiss, attempting to break away. Harry only held on tighter and forced Tom's mouth, to be far too occupied to do anything but kiss.
Ten minutes later, they began pulled apart, both breathless. "Harry, I"
Again they were interrupted when people who should be in bed and asleep, were out on deck probably wondering what the shudder had been.
"Come on Harry, we better find out what's going on." Tom grabbed Harry's hand in his and pulled him along. There were chunks of ice along the Port side of the boat.
A group of men walked by them as Harry played with a chunk of ice, and Tom overheard a portion of what they were saying.
"Iceberg hit along the Port side, and we need to know how many compartments have been flooded" After that they were too far away to be heard, but that told Tom all he needed to hear.
"Harry, come here." Harry hurried to Tom, ice in hand, and stood at his side. "Harry, something bad has happened. We need to know more, but I want you to stay with me. Hold on to my hand and don't let go, understand?"
"But what's" Tom silenced Harry again with another kiss, then stepped back.
Tom held out his hand, which Harry quickly took hold of. Harry had always wanted Tom to hold his hand and be closer to him, and now it seemed his wishes had come true.
Tom's mind was trying to work out what they should do. If the worst case scenario happened, women and children would be put on to the Lifeboats. Tom couldn't stand the fact that Harry wouldn't be able to be put on to any lifeboat even after the women and children were all gone. It would be first class men after that.
He'd make sure, no matter what, that Harry would survive.
Time was passing quickly now. As Tom had feared, the lifeboats had been uncovered, and all the crew, were out attempting to calm people. Tom couldn't believe what he saw next. There was a band playing. They were still in the first class section, and the band had obviously been put there to keep people calm.
"Tom!" Someone behind them shouted. Tom turned to see the Irish man they had seen, the one who had invited them to the party.
"Do you know what's going on? I managed to get past the gate, before the officers locked them all up."
"The ships sinking, Bill." That was the Irishman's name. "Did you feel that shudder about an hour ago?" He waited for Bill's nod before he continued. "It was an iceberg. The ship's sinking. Look," Tom pointed over to a group of people and a lifeboat.
Tom lowered his voice, low enough so Harry couldn't hear. "They're lowering the lifeboats Bill. The ship's sinking. You know what's going to happen."
"Yeah." Bill replied, just as quiet.
"Get back and get your family up here. Tell everyone they need to get to a lifeboat. Now! Don't wait!"
Bill didn't reply, as he ran off to do what Tom said.
"Come on Har. Where getting you on a lifeboat."
"No Tom!" Harry wrapped his arms around Tom's waist tightly. "I'm not going to leave you. Please, I don't want to leave you."
"Oh Harry," Tom began, gently stroking Harry's cheek soothingly. "You know I'd never leave you if I could help it. I'll be right behind you on the next boat."
"Why can't I go on one with you?" Harry asked, pleadingly.
Tears were in both men's eyes now, as Tom pulled against Harry into a tight embrace.
"I love you Harry. Remember that!" He didn't give Harry time to respond as he dragged a very unwilling Harry to a lifeboat.
"I'm sorry Sir," The officer started. "No men allowed at this time."
"Come on," Tom pleaded. "Not me. Him." Tom indicated Harry. "He's just a kid."
The officer looked at Harry for a moment, before nodding in agreement. "But only him. Your certainly no child."
"Agreed!" Tom pushed Harry forward. "Go on Harry. I'll be following you soon. I promise you."
"No Harry. You go now, and I'll follow later."
The boat was being lowered. Tom quickly pulled Harry into one last hug, and then pushed him on to the lowering boat. By the time Harry got back up, the boat was too low to get back to the deck.
Their eyes never leaving one another as the boat continued to be lowered. But Harry suddenly jumped off the boat to the deck below.
"Harrryyy! Tom screamed, half in anger, half in horror.
They met up on the second deck, where Harry had jumped to. He was waiting exactly where he had left the boat, almost afraid to do anything until Tom got there.
"Harry." Tom shouted, running up to where Harry stood.
He couldn't be angry with Harry, who was shivering and stood exactly as Tom had told him to do before they came on board. He had told Harry, that if he ever got lost, to just stay where he was until he found him.
"Oh Harry. You're so stupid Harry. Why, why'd you do that?" Tom asked in frustration.
"I didn't want to be alone, Tom. I want to be with you." The pain was made all the more great at Harry's words. Tom, although not really bothered with his own death, had to be concerned. If he died, who would look after Harry?
There were plenty of people who would love to have Harry. He was young, exotic, good- looking. They would probably use the kid, and then leave. Harry was too good for that. He needed attention, someone who would look out for him. "Let's go Harry. We'll try to find a lifeboat we can both go on."
Emergency Flares had been shot off above them ever since the first lifeboat had been lowered. Harry loved fireworks, and just stared at each one in awe from where he was. Tom had been arguing with an officer who had only a half filled a lifeboat, and was preparing to lower it, and Tom had told Harry to sit for him there and wait, which Harry had done.
Tom saw his attempts were in vain. Each lifeboat they were denied entrance on, took a piece of Tom's hope with it.
Tom was getting to the point now where he was begging with each officer.
"Harry, come on let's go." Tom reached for Harry's hand and they headed for the other side of the boat.
Time was quickly going, a fact which Tom was only to aware of. The lifeboats were two-thirds gone and there was a noticeable slope to the boat now. When you headed aft, it was like walking up hill.
It was almost two in the morning now, and the flares had stopped been fired, which meant there were no more distractions for Harry, which further meant, more questions for Tom.
"How many lifeboats are there left Tom? Why is the boat slanting? What will happen to all the people who don't get on a boat soon? I'm tired, can we sit down soon? Why have the fireworks stopped?"
"HARRY!" Tom shouted. "Please honey, stop asking questions, ok?"
"Ok Tom." Harry was quiet from then on, as they continued their search for a lifeboat.
(Twenty Minutes Later)
The ship was at such an angle now that you had to struggle to make it to the back of the boat. The last lifeboat had been lowered, and gone with it, Tom and Harry's last hope.
Tom knew the icy cold water was their soon to be, very real fate. So keeping out of the water as long as possible seemed to be the best decision. They headed for the back of the boat quickly, as everyone else seemed to have the very same idea, at the same time. All rushing to the back of the boat.
"Hold my hand tight Harry! Don't let go!"
They were almost to the very back, and the ship was quickly approaching an almost vertical angle.
"Climb to the other side Harry, quickly."
"But what about"
"I'm right behind you." Tom answered for him.
Harry climbed over the bars, and Tom followed. The lights flicked and went out.
Harry hated being outside in the dark, so Tom quickly pulled Harry to him, hugging him reassuringly.
"It's ok Harry. I'm here. Everything is going to be ok." Harry was shivering slightly but leaned into Tom's embrace.
The boat was suspended totally in the air. All that could be heard were terrible, frightened screams. People who didn't have time to make it to the other side of the bar's were hanging on with there hands, and many of them were letting go, unable to hold themselves.
The boat slowly began to sink, giving Tom only a minute to explain to Harry what to do.
"Harry, listen to me. This ship is going to sink. It's going to suck us down. When we go under swim as hard as you can to the surface, understand?"
Y-yes." Harry was terrified, and Tom was unable to do anything now to help. "Take a deep breath when I tell you Harry, and do not let go of my hand, understand?"
Harry simply nodded.
Luckily, Tom had put a lifejacket on Harry after it became clear there was little chance of getting on a lifeboat. So it would be easier for Harry to re-surface.
"Okay Harry, get ready. Take a deep breathnow!"
They both took a deep breath and then went under the water. Harry felt the incredible force of been sucked down, and then a wave of bubbles helped push him up.
"Tom!" Harry screamed once he reached the surface. He had lost his grip on Tom whilst under the water, and was now panicked without him.
People were scattered everywhere. Screaming out to people who were most likely dead.
"Tom, please Tom, I need you! Harry continued to shout.
"Harry!" Tom shrieked.
Harry spun around and saw Tom swimming towards him. They swam towards an area with fewer people, and Tom pushed Harry up on to a piece of floating wood.
Tom tried to get on himself, but it wouldn't take the weight on so swam around to face Harry.
"W-w-where gonna b-be ok Harry." Tom was feeling the water so cold, that you couldn't imagine unless you felt it.
"Tom, I'm cold. When will we get rescued?"
"S-soon Harry. We're going to be saved soon." Harry believed anything Tom said, and so relaxed slightly at Tom's reassuring words.
A little while later Tom woke the sleeping Harry up. "Harry, y-you h-h-have t-t-o stay a-awake. W-w-when the rescue b-boat comes, you need t-t-o show them that y-you're alive."
"But why can't you do that Tom?" Harry asked, uncertain.
Tom's body was completely numb now, and he knew he would be dead long before any rescue would come. But he wouldn't let Harry die. He was too young, had to much to experience.
"Harry, remember what I said a few days back?" Tom watched as Harry's eye-brows furrowed in thought, and then he spoke. "You told me that if you were not around anymore, that I shouldn't let anyone push me around." Harry smiled at remembering what Tom had said.
Tom struggled, but manage to give Harry a grin. "Yes Harry. Well done."
"But you're going to be around Tom! You promised me we'd be alright!"
"Just promise me Harry. You keep living. Live your life. Never let anyone push you around!"
"Harry, promise me!" Tom's strength was quickly dissipating and he needed this reassurance before he died.
"I'll make sure no one pushes me around Tom! I promise."
A few tears escaped Tom's eyes, and he moved forward for one final kiss. Tom's lips were cold and broken, against Harry's slightly more moist ones.
Tom pulled back and struggled to stay awake for a few more seconds, continuing to stare at Harry. He was laden with thoughts of what could have been, if only they'd had more time. But all too soon, Tom began to slip into cold blackness. Taking one last look at Harry before he finally fell into an eternal slumber.
An hour later Harry again woke up. Tom was in front of him asleep.
"Tom," Harry's now croaky voice spoke. "Wake up." Harry had woken because he had heard the calls from a rescue boat. "We're going to be rescued Tom."
Harry continued to shake Tom for a few more minutes, before the realization of why Tom wouldn't wake up came to him. "No Tom, no, you can't be" He couldn't say the words out loud.
"I'll never let anyone ever push me around Tom. Never." He took a breath before continuing. "I promise you I'll never forget." With those final words, he moved in for a kiss, on Tom's blue, icy lips.
Harry's felt as though his insides had been ripped out. Moving on without Tom would be the hardest thing he'd ever done, and probably would ever do.
Then anger swept over Harry. How could Tom die? Leaving him all alone like this. Tom was supposed to look after, and take care of him. Tom knew him like no one else ever had. He knew how to comfort him, and how to make him laugh. How could he go on?
But then he remembered the promise he had made.
He pulled Tom's arms off the piece of broken wood, and pushed him off into the water. Looking at Tom's face as he sank down into the same icy depths which had killed him.
The rescue crew found Harry, waving to them, while still casting glances at the place where Tom had vanished into the dark depths. "I will keep my promise Tom," he whispered as memories of Tom followed him.
Harry lived a long and full life, keeping his promise to Tom. When he eventually died, his last thoughts were of rejoining the man he loved.