A Little Love Story
by PJ in NH (upon suggestion of DocJan and Laura Hale)
In the Messhall during a romantic dinner...
T: Tom, is that your foot I feel trying to worm its way into my pant leg?
P: It isn't Neelix's.
T: Neelix? Are you trying to make me sick?
P: No, not sick, just interested. How about we take the wine and head back to my cabin?
T: Your cabin?
P: Maybe your cabin?
P. [smiles back]
Later in Tom's Cabin...
P: Cheers, B'Elanna.
T: [B'Elanna sips the wine.] Very nice.
P: I don't replicate the best Merlot for just anyone.
T: So you went to all this trouble just because you like me, not because you want to get me in the sack?
P: B'Elanna! I'm shocked that you would think such a thing!
T: Don't tell me you didn't think about it.
P: Cross my heart.
[B'Elanna sips the wine.]
T: Mmmmm, this is good. But remember I'm watching you.
P: I'm counting on it.
Later that evening... they took a stroll and ended up in Engineering....hey use your imagination (you think this is easy?!)....
T:[Mmmm, this IS good! Actually, he even tastes good.]
P: You know we should stop. This might be just the wine making us do this.
T: Just the wine? I don't think so.
P: So you want me?
T: I don't just want you, Tom Paris. I crave you. And if you stop I'll kill you!
P: Be still my beating heart!
T: Just as long as the rest of you isn't still!
P: Yes, ma'am.
T: I love an obedient man!
Three weeks later in the mess hall...
P: B'Elanna, you look...um...green.
T: I feel green. I can't keep anything down, and I can't remember ever feeling so tired.
P: [Giggles] You don't suppose you have morning sickness do you?
T: That's very funny.
P: I'm kidding, you can't get pregnant. I've had my shot months ago and...
T: Ssssh...you want everyone to know what we've been doing?
P: B'Elanna, I hate to be the one to break this too you, but everyone on Deck 9 Section 12, and everyone on Deck 4 Section3 either know all about us or they are all deaf.
A few days later in Sickbay....the Doctor provides a lesson in the reproductive system to the Ensign and Lieutenant...
EMH: And thus the sperm attacks the female ova....Now the odds of a human sperm impregnating a half-Klingon/half-human egg is...
P: We know how pregnancy occurs, Doc, and the odds are moot at this point.
T: We just want to know why it happened to us. Tom is up-to-date on his birth control shots isn't he?
P: Of course I am. Aren't I?
EMH: Of course he is...[scans the pilot with his medical tricorder]....um....well...
EMH: You remember that time you changed into a lizard. Apparently, it interferred with your body chemistry. In other words, congratulatations, Mr. Paris, you are going to be a father!
P: Would you rather have someone else be the father?
T: Don't tempt me!
P: You okay, B'Elanna?
T: Do I look okay, Tom!?
P: Maybe it was something we ate?
P: Well I'm not pregnant. If it was just you, I'd say that you were just having another bout of morning sickness.
T: Haven't you ever heard of sympathy morning sickness?
P: Sympathy? How is this for sympathy? Will you marry me.
T: Marry you! I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man on Earth.
P: We aren't on Earth.
T: Good point.
P: And I am the father.
T: Another good point.
T: So what?
P: Will you marry me? //pause// B'Elanna Torres, I love you, will you please marry me?
T: Wait a minute, I'm not finished yet. //Baarfff// Yes, I will marry you.
P: So romantic.
T: Don't push it Paris.
A few days later, the crew gather for The Wedding...
Janeway: Do you Tom Paris take B'Elanna Torres to be your lawfully wedded wife. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, until death you do part?
P: //aside//sickness and in health--oh boy.//
T: //aside// Watch it, helmboy, or you'll have to find another shuttlebay to park your little flyer.
P: //aside// Little?!
Janeway: Ah....Mr. Paris, do you take B'Elanna to be your lawfully wedded wife?
P: Ah, I do?
A few months pass, B'Elanna's starting to show...
P: B'Elanna, be careful with that.
T: Why should I? You weren't careful!
P: It was a mistake. Honest.
T: Mistake. Do you think all these extra hormones surging through my body feels like a mistake! Do you think my continued morning sickness feels like a 'mistake'?[B'Elanna waves the bat'leth back and forth inches from Tom's face] Do you think having to wear those silly engineering smocks is my wardrobe of choice?!
P: Watch it, Torres, you'll take my nose off with that thing.
T: I wouldn't be aiming for your nose, Paris!
T: Just call me by my middle name: Loreena.
P: Anyone ever tell you that you look incredbily sexy when you're angry?
Later, back in their cabin, after they change...
T: So you think I look sexy, huh?.
P: Yep, incredibly sexy.
T: Pregnant and all. I feel like a whale.
P: You look beautiful.
T: I don't feel beautiful. I feel huge!
P: Let me show you just how much I love you, and how gorgeous you are.
T: You're too good for me, Tom.
P: I haven't done anything yet.
T: But you will.
Several weeks later...
P: Dahlia? You want to name our little bundle of joy: Dahlia?
T: What's wrong with Dahlia? It is a lot better than P'Rika!.
P: But Dahlia, it sounds so old. You might as well call her Pansy or Petunia!
T: And P'Rika sounds like a paprika. She not some kind of...kind of...ah..spice child! I'm warning you, Paris...// she points an angry finger at the pilot like only a pregnant, hormonal imbalanced, half-Klingon can//... I won't name her P'Rika!
P: There must be something we can do. Perhaps a compromise?
P: Yes, well you like Dahlia //he grimaces// and I like P'Trika.
T: Smiling. How about Darika?
Several weeks after the birth...
T: I'm so happy!
P: Me too, and doesn't Darika look adorable.
T: She's really taken a shine to Chakotay.
P: She sure has. Though I don't know what she sees in him. But, everytime he holds her she spits up all over his shoulder.
T: And you smile everytime she does that.
P: You trained her well, Mrs. Paris.
T: Now if only I could train you.
Special thanks to Doc Jan and Laura for providing the above pictures!